We all receive criticism from time to time. Sometimes they may not be true, but on other occasions they can help us consider what we are doing wrong. It is not the same to criticize us to our face and explain the reasons for the criticism, than to do it in a public place in front of other people and without explaining to us what they consider we have done wrong. But what to do in those situations in which they make us look ridiculous? Do we pretend we haven’t heard it? Do we get angry and let the situation get out of hand?
You may not be able to stop someone from criticizing you, but what you can do is change the way you perceive criticism. When you find yourself in this situation, we invite you to try these 10 tips to better handle criticism You will surely appreciate it!
1. Evaluate the criticism and the person making it
It is important to be objective to know how to respond and act. There is a big difference between constructive criticism and criticism from someone who only wants to hurt you to discredit you. Therefore, Evaluate if what that person says is true
What to do: Try to distance yourself from the situation and lower your ego, just as if the situation were happening to someone else and not to you. Breathe deeply and don’t let yourself get carried away by anger.
2. Recognize your emotions
The pressure of the moment can dominate you if you are not able to recognize your emotions or what bothers you about criticism. When someone hurts you, especially someone close to you, it is still best to let it go to avoid unnecessary confrontation. But It is important that you recognize those emotions because they can tell you that something is not right. If you don’t pay attention to your emotions, the problem may become bigger and even eternal. Recognizing the message they send you is the beginning of being able to deal with problems appropriately.
What to do: Before you give in to impulse, pay attention to what your emotions are trying to tell you. Ask yourself: If this emotion could speak now, what would it say? What would I do? Or… What can I do to get out of this situation in a relaxed way?
3. Set clear limits on habitual criticizers
You can decide who and what you tolerate in your life. Because both in your personal life and in your work life you can encounter people who criticize you, but You decide the limits you set for that person and how you are going to feel about what they say about you It is good for your well-being that you stay away from this type of toxic people, as it can affect you emotionally. At work it can have a negative impact on your performance, your creativity and can harm a good work environment.
What to do: Decide what you are going to do if the critic continues with the criticism. Try to convey, calmly and delicately, that you are not willing to tolerate this situation. For example, you can tell them that this time you are going to let it go, but if it happens again, the relationship with that person will end. When you make it clear where the limit is, you gain respect. Be sure to take action if it happens again.
4. Search for the hidden truth
Close people, co-workers or someone in line at the supermarket They can respond to our actions, and their behaviors can reflect our own words Their criticism, however harsh or spiteful, may hide some aspect of our own behavior that we have refused to see, but which may be true. For criticism to be constructive, it looks for that hidden truth, even if it is not always easy to accept it.
What to do: Instead of reacting angrily to criticism, have the courage to ask yourself: Does this criticism have any truth? Then ask yourself or the other person again if there is anything you can do so they don’t feel offended.
5. Don’t let them tell lies about you
When someone spreads rumors or lies that can affect your work or relationships, you can’t ignore it. In these cases it is better that you face the problem head on to clear your name
What to do: To clear your mind, take a few deep breaths and grab a piece of paper. On one side, she writes the rumor or lie. On the other side, write the lie as you see it. Meet with those people who may have misinterpreted your actions or words and calmly explain how you feel and what really happened. Even if they don’t believe you, at least you were able to defend yourself, so you can move on with your life.
6. Solve problems from the heart
If you speak from the heart and honestly, it is much better than reacting impulsively and resentfully. Acting like this makes you a great person, and doesn’t allow the situation to get worse
What to do: In difficult situations, reconnect with yourself and your heart. Simply close your eyes and breathe. Think of something nice or something to be deeply grateful for. Once the anger has subsided, revisit the problem and ask yourself: What can I do to resolve this situation? What is my next step? Listen to the answers that arise from your heart.
7. Follow your path
When an insult from someone immature reaches you, instead of making yourself adopt the role of victim, go your way. Don’t let criticism distract you from your goals Think of those comments as just noise.
What to do: Don’t let harmful criticism get to you, and don’t let all the critics knock you off your game. Not every criticism requires a response. Stay focused on keeping important things in your life so you can continue to give a lot to others.
Sometimes what affects you is not your fault. The person who criticizes you may have a self-esteem problem or is going through a bad time On these occasions, it may be their way of saying that they need help. For example, your roommate may be having a hard time with his partner and criticizes you for not cleaning up the dishes. In this case, you may be in his sights for being a person close to him, but what really happens to him is that he is not capable of managing so much emotional pain. Reach out to him instead of fighting with him.
What to do: When you detect that this may be the problem, ask him what’s wrong. You can also tell him that you know he is having a hard time and that this is affecting your relationship.
9. Be polite but firm in public
Humiliation, whether from a boss or a co-worker in a meeting, or from a family member, can be embarrassing and uncomfortable. Don’t criticize critics or fight with them This will only hurt you. Be polite, be calm and control your impulses.
What to do: If someone has legitimate reasons but has verbalized them inappropriately, smile and say something to break the tension, and also add: “If there is something that has bothered you, I would like to talk to you about it later.”
10. Don’t take it personally
If you have heeded the above advice and adjusted your behavior but they continue to criticize you, it is time to move on. Unfortunately, Some people criticize to project their own problems onto others So don’t take it personally.
What to do: Instead of wasting your energy and attention on critical comments, free yourself from them, accept them, let them go, and move on with your life.
