Betrayal is one of those circumstances that we can suffer in silence for a time, and that can hurt the heart of the betrayed person. Whether on the part of a partner, a friend, family members or a co-worker, this situation awakens very intense and painful emotions.
And the loss of trust that occurs with the “traitor” makes reconciliation with that person very difficult. In fact, in many cases, After betrayal there is a grieving process in which it is time to accept the situation. A complicated grieving process, because the circumstances are not ideal to heal the wounds.
Over time, however, one can rebuild one’s life and move on. You may even forgive the other person.
Overcoming betrayal is not easy, and if we care a lot about the person, it can affect different areas of our life. Now, these delicate and painful situations can sink us for a time, but they can also provide valuable experiences and learning of incalculable value for and for life.
But, What to do when they betray us? How to overcome this delicate moment? In the following lines we give you some keys to do it.
1. Analyze the circumstances in which the betrayal occurred
After a betrayal, and as in any grieving situation, the first stage that the person experiences is shock. Betrayal is such a painful situation that some people experience a knot in their stomach and terrible disappointment and sadness. In this situations It is important to talk to someone close, because channeling these types of emotions may not be easy. Talking to other people can also allow you to see things from another perspective.
It is also important that you analyze the context and the reason why the betrayal occurred. For example, if we are talking about a partner’s infidelity, you may not have taken the other person’s needs into account. It is good to do self-criticism once the denial phase passes
2. Don’t be hard on yourself
It is common for anger and sadness to appear in these situations. Sadness is usually experienced when a person begins to recognize the extent of the situation. Despite the pain and the feeling of betrayal, It is also common to remember good things about the relationship and what one misses. If you feel betrayed it is because the other person was important to you.
The truth is that during times of sadness you need to release those emotions, and, in fact, this can happen at the same time that you feel anger. Emotional instability is common in these delicate moments. What you should do is treat yourself with compassion, and if you have to cry, do it! The important thing is that you don’t be hard on yourself.
3. Don’t hold a grudge
While we should treat ourselves kindly, we should also not hold grudges toward other people. When we feel anger, we experience a need to vent, especially against the person who hurt us. We feel like taking revenge.
However, this is not a good way to channel emotions, and what we can achieve with this action also harms us. The best alternative is, in fact, not to hold a grudge
Acceptance is one of the best decisions we can make to regain well-being and mental health. Because just as I said in the previous point, recreating ourselves in frustration or anger The only thing that will lead to it is that we are the ones who suffer the most Accepting something like this is not always easy, but in the article “Self-acceptance: 5 psychological tips to achieve it” you can find useful information to achieve it.
5. Take your time
Acceptance can take time because you have to follow a series of stages and you need time to reflect on what happened. Now, as we explained in the article “Does time heal everything? Science answers.” Time is good to see things from another perspective, but To heal emotional wounds we must also do our part
6. Be sincere
It is important that, throughout the process, you are honest with yourself and with the other person. Connect with yourself and not avoid reality It is one of the best ways to face problems On the other hand, if, for example, you want to overcome infidelity, sincerity is the best way to do it. In this sense, you can learn more in the article “Overcoming infidelity: the 5 keys to achieving it.”
7. Sorry!
Forgiving that person who has betrayed you does not mean that you have to accept them back into your life or that you agree with their behavior, but rather that It is an act of maturity, in which the situation has been accepted and the person is freed from feeling resentment. In fact, forgiveness has many benefits. In the article “Forgiveness: should I or should I not forgive the person who hurt me?” you can check.
