Divorce is one of the most painful experiences that a family can suffer, since not only the marriage ends, but also the dreams and hopes placed in that relationship and the unity of the family environment.
That’s why divorce It is a complex grieving process which can sometimes be complicated by legal disputes and the battle for custody of children or material assets.
If you are experiencing this situation firsthand, in the following lines you can find a series of tips that will help you live this stage of your life in a more adaptive way and with less impact on your self-esteem.
1. Accept the divorce
Getting over a divorce is not easy, because when the time comes to leave everything we have experienced behind, there are many memories that hit our minds again and again. Accepting that the situation has come to an end is not easy, but it is necessary.
Recognizing that you are going through a period of grief and accepting it is the first step to be able to look to the future with optimism, since it is common to deny this new reality as a form of protection. The impact of the breakup is so great that it is difficult to assimilate it
That’s why you must be honest with what you really feel. Accepting divorce includes living the grieving process without running away from it. Understanding that pain is normal at this stage of your life will help you reduce it. Don’t run away from your emotions and what you feel, because over time it is possible to regain normality.
Feeling bad is not bad, and crying is very helpful in relieving pain. The same thing happens when sharing our thoughts with others, and that is why it is good to express feelings as a form of catharsis.
Have contact with close people can help you get through this difficult time in your life, while isolating yourself and seeking solitude can make the situation worse. In these difficult times, surround yourself with those who love you.
3. Take advantage of the divorce to grow
Don’t waste the pain of this delicate situation, but use it to motivate yourself to grow, pursue new goals, and enjoy new activities. Take advantage of this opportunity to focus on yourself, because now you will have more time for it.
The fact of feeling bad can allow you to empower yourself in the face of life if you know how to channel pain and accept your negative emotions This can lead you to experience new situations if you are able to take the initiative. Many times, even the most adverse situations can be taken advantage of.
4. Engage in pleasurable activities
Happiness is not something static but dynamic, and we are the ones who have to go for it with our habits, our actions and our positive attitude. Scientific studies suggest that Pleasurable activities such as physical exercise can reduce discomfort and improve our emotional balance, as they help us release neurochemicals related to happiness and pleasure, such as endorphins or serotonin, among others.
Scientific research also suggests that going outside and exposing ourselves to the sun (always in a healthy way) increases the production of vitamin D in our body, which is essential for the functioning of the immune system and favors the production of endorphins, hormones related to pleasure.
5. Participate in an Emotional Intelligence workshop
Emotionally intelligent people enjoy greater well-being and happiness, according to studies. Luckily, emotional intelligence is something that can be worked on and acquired. The key components of this practice are: emotional self-knowledge, emotional self-regulation, self-motivation recognition of the emotions of others and social skills.
There are many workshops that train their participants so that they can become emotionally intelligent people. In the article “The 6 best Emotional Intelligence and Personal Development courses” you can find the best selection of these workshops.
6. Don’t get obsessed with finding a new partner
Separating from the partner with whom you have lived so many moments and becoming fully happy again can take time, and although sometimes it seems that the best way to not feel alone is to be with someone, this is not the case.
Recovering emotional and psychological well-being requires a process of assimilation and acceptance that we must not avoid, because it will allow us to empower ourselves in the face of change and adapt better to this new context. Find happiness again It is in us and not in others.
7. Go to psychological therapy
Sometimes it can be complex to get over a divorce, especially in cases where there are legal disputes or children are involved. In these situations, the help of a psychology professional is decisive to regain emotional balance.
Divorce can be a highly stressful experience and experts speak of “post-divorce trauma” due to the acuity and high intensity of the emotional reactions that the person experiences after separation.
Feelings of having been hurt, humiliated, psychologically abused, or betrayed can lead divorced people to states of anger, states of depression, anxiety lack of impulse control, as well as multiple emotional and behavioral difficulties, such as, for example, uncontrolled consumption of medications or other drugs such as alcohol.
Likewise, divorce entails the loss of multiple roles in a person’s life, which may require the acquisition of self-awareness and social/relational skills to face this new life challenge.
Mensalus Institute: experts in divorce therapy
In this context, psychological assistance may be necessary to be able to face this arduous challenge, manage the crisis effectively, stabilize emotionally and accept the reality of separation.
If you identify with the previous lines, the Mensalus Institute of Barcelona, one of the most prestigious psychology centers in Spain, can offer you solutions and help you with the difficulties you are going through at the moment.
This clinic has more than 30 years of experience in psychotherapeutic practice, and in addition to offering in-person psychotherapy, it also provides online therapy service. Mensalus is made up of a team of psychologists highly specialized in divorce therapy so therapeutic sessions with their professionals can provide you with positive resources to face this process of change and provide you with the necessary tools to face this stage of your life with great strength and security.
