Happiness has become the impossible desire of those who escape unpleasant emotions at full speed, fleeing without knowing where or why. At least consciously.
“You are here to be happy” A well-known soft drink brand has spent 4.2 billion dollars to make us understand it. The reality is different.
We know that happiness and joy are not the same thing and that Sooner or later, sadness appears on the scene, an emotion that is more unpleasant than negative..
This emotion appears when we have the feeling of having lost something valuable, be it a person, an object, or even an opportunity (who has not felt sad when an illusion has fallen, or when we realize that Aren’t we the same person as before the pandemic?). The loss does not have to be perceived as irreversible, and the more significant the loss is to us, the more sadness we will feel.
The sadness It helps us to be introspective, to analyze a situation without excessive optimism and to evaluate a problem.. On a social level, it invites others to feel empathy and encourages them to help us.
In addition, we are less demanding with those who are sad, as it works as a safeguard against responsibilities or schedules (sometimes too profitable for those who appear sad!).
When it comes with force, it does not come alone. It is followed by feelings of lack of physical and mental vitality, loss of enthusiasm and slowing of metabolism.
Let’s propose some suggestions to manage sadness
These are several key ideas for learning to manage sadness.
1. Sadness is part of the emotional rainbow that we can feel
Receive the emotion and reflect on what it indicates to you. If you try to avoid it it will reappear. In general, when we talk about emotions, “what you throw out the door comes back out the window.”
2. Shame for being sad?
When they tell us “you don’t cry”, “be a man”… we learn to hide sadness as if it were part of something that is not normal. Try sharing it! Socializing emotions helps us manage them. Feeling understood makes our sadness lose intensity so that we can detach ourselves from it and look at the situation more objectively.
3. It doesn’t matter if you don’t really know where it comes from and where it’s going!
Sometimes we stay stuck in the “need” to resolve our sadness; that is, knowing perfectly where it comes from. This excess analysis can cause some paralysisgetting us into a vicious circle from which it is difficult to get out.
4. Take time to be sad
You don’t have to sink if you live the emotion. It’s not that dangerous.
If you have important decisions to make, consider the possibility of postponing them if you think that sadness has taken you.
6. Don’t forget the physical
Get the best sleep you can, exercise, and engage in the activities you like to do or used to like to do. This point is crucial.
People often say “because I’m sad, I don’t do what I like because I won’t have the same time.” Go against this scheme, do things despite being sad! This does not mean that you do not have moments to embrace sadness, it is not a call to avoid it.
7. Learn from past crises
Look back at those experiences where you felt failure, loss and pain in the past and try to relate them to your current situation.
8. Pay attention to the thoughts that accompany sadness
Often this emotion comes hand in hand with particular ways of approaching reality.. These “sadness glasses” are graduated so that life seems grayer than it is. Thus, sadness tells us that our successes are worth less than our failures, that things are more difficult than they are, that a mistake will have more painful consequences than it will have, and that we have little ability to influence the results we expect.
Concluding
Definitely, fleeing from sadness is fleeing from a part of life. Trying to amputate the pain will cause it to become more entrenched than necessary, causing it to stay with us like a phantom limb that orbits our daily lives.
