Depression is a disease that affects 5% of the Spanish population , according to studies carried out this year. Therefore, most people know, or even live with, someone who suffers from depression to a greater or lesser degree.
In view of these statistics and the difficulties that this condition entails, it is important to know how we can accompany these people, making their daily lives a little easier. Therefore, in this article we will review several tips to help a person with depression taking into account that this is a psychopathology that can be very serious.
First of all, it is necessary to clarify that, despite talking about depression in general terms, it can present in different forms and many degrees depending on the person. However, there are a series of common feelings or thoughts that tend to prevail in all people affected by depression, and that help identify this psychopathology.
Likewise, in order to help a depressed person, or at least make things easier for them while they are in the process of recovery, It is necessary to first know how you feel and what you think , even if only in an approximate way. Knowing what feelings and beliefs flood the mind of a person with depression, it will be easier for family and friends to be able to accompany them. This involves putting aside prejudices about what “people with mental health problems” are supposed to be (a concept that in many cases is associated with many stereotypes and a certain stigmatization).
There are some psychopathologies similar to major depression, although in most cases they are alterations that are included within the concept of mood disorders Therefore, although it may be useful to know, for example, the differences between unipolar depression and the depressive episode of bipolar disorder, or the keys to distinguishing between major depressive disorder and dysthymia, it is generally mental health professionals those who care to take these nuances into account; The tips that we will see later usually help in all the ways that a mood disorder with depressive symptoms can present.
Some of the thoughts and sensations of a person with depression are the following.
1. Self-devaluation, hopelessness and grief
Depressed mood is characterized by being accompanied by feelings of hopelessness and guilt feelings that cause great distress in the person who experiences them.
Usually, the depressed person thinks that there is nothing that can be done to improve or fix the situation, as well as experiencing great disregard or contempt for themselves.
Since the person is perfectly aware of both his suffering and the anguish that this causes in the people around him, feelings of guilt for causing suffering in others They are also very common.
All of these reflections end up causing anxious symptoms in the person that manifest themselves through palpitations, tremors, a feeling of suffocation, and a very disabling general malaise.
2. Need for social isolation
Due to previous thoughts and beliefs, it is common for the person suffering from depression to end up rejecting a large part of your social life and relationships This need for solitude or isolation can end up degenerating into almost total lack of communication and personal abandonment.
At the same time, this isolation aggravates feelings of hopelessness and contempt so it becomes a vicious cycle for the person.
3. Feeling of lack of energy
The lack of strength or energy to carry out any type of activity, no matter how simple or elementary, is one of the main symptoms or complaints that the person reports.
4. Fluctuations and changes in symptoms
It is common for people who suffer from depression to experience a series of fluctuations in your mood throughout the day Just as the intensity of the symptoms does not have to be stable during the development of the disease.
Most patients report that their symptoms are milder in the afternoon and that the discomfort is almost always accentuated in the mornings. These cyclical swings generate great anxiety in the person, who anticipates and tries to predict when he or she is going to feel bad.
How to help a person with depression?
Although the above points are only a small part of the wide range of symptoms, feelings and thoughts that can circulate through the mind of a person with depression, knowing them can be of great help when it comes to try to help her and accompany her during recovery
It is necessary to point out that This is not therapy and that for a person with depression to be able to overcome it, psychological intervention through a professional is necessary. Below are a series of suggestions to help anyone suffering from this type of affliction.
1. Suggest the help of a professional
As mentioned above, no matter how good the intentions of someone trying to help a depressed person, non-professional support and advice cannot cure a person with depression in and of themselves.
The first thing to keep in mind is that Depression is an illness that can be very serious and that therefore therapeutic intervention at the hands of a professional is necessary.
In this case, something that can be done is to persuade the person and convince them to seek help or psychological assistance. Although this task is not going to be easy, it is extremely necessary. Through calm conversations with great tact and subtlety the family should insist on the idea of visiting a professional and, if necessary, offer to accompany them.
2. Avoid life advice
Although the desire to help is always positive, suggestions to encourage the person through advice to make them feel better, to reflect on what they have, or through continuous invitations to go out and do activities are absolutely ineffective, even becoming counterproductive and causing more discomfort in the person
3. Take into account the complexes associated with gender
Various research shows that gender roles and Stereotypes about what it means to be “a man” and “a woman” can get in the way of seeking help by people suffering from depression. For example, many men consider exposing their emotional vulnerabilities to be humiliating, which makes it more difficult for them to commit to the process of improving their mental health; and many women decide to stop prioritizing their well-being so as not to stop supporting their loved ones from the role of “mother” or “wife.”
Therefore, to help a person with depression, we must consider whether that individual is prone to being affected by these gender roles and talk to them about their problem in a way that does not make them feel guilt or shame for giving their mental health the importance it deserves.
That said, what a person with depression really needs is that the people around you are empathetic that they express their understanding and that they can be by their side when they need it.
5. Strengthen your strengths
Due to decreased self-esteem and the undervaluation he suffers, The depressed person tends to reject and not admit the progress they make during the treatment process. These people tend to highlight their deficiencies or shortcomings and ignore their potential and successes.
To help you, it is vital that your closest circles are able to put emphasis on those skills, abilities or successes that the person possesses.
6. Respect their silence
It makes no sense to force or force a person with depression to speak or convey what they feel, as well as to be sociable, given that It’s not something that’s under your control These types of approach attempts usually cause more tension and feelings of incomprehension in the person.
7. Give hope
The feelings of hopelessness associated with depression lock the person in a tunnel from which they are unable to see the exit. Therefore, it is advisable that family members or people around you transmit to you, through coherent discourse and without being overly optimistic that even though I am not able to see it now, there is a way out.
It is necessary to convince him that depression is a disease with treatment and cure and that if he follows the intervention guidelines he will improve.
8. Do not ask for explanations
On many occasions, and with the intention of trying to understand what is happening to them in order to help, the person is pressured to try to tell what causes this suffering. However, depression is not an illness caused by a single factor, and in most cases not even the person themselves knows what has led them to such an extreme.
Therefore, asking for rational explanations when the person is not in a rational situation does not make any sense, and will only trigger feelings of frustration and irritation
9. Take care of your own emotional health
Finally, it is necessary that whoever accompanies the depressed person through their recovery is able to avoid the possible psychological effects that this may cause.
Depressed moods can be contagious if the person is not aware of it. Seeing someone you love suffer can trigger great emotional distress, so the person must be protected from this possible risk.
