Yes, it is true that appearances, for better or worse, matter a lot nowadays. But it is no less true that in many aspects of our lives, or even in those that are most important, aesthetics are no longer so relevant in human relationships.
In the end, a pretty face or good skill when choosing clothes is of no use if you don’t even know the most basic principles to maintain a friendship or a relationship.
And no matter how much they say, Inner beauty is not something isolated within each person, but rather it is manifested through his actions and his way of externalizing his thoughts. In the end, no matter how internal it may be, if we do not do what is necessary to put it into practice and make it influence our relationships, it does not exist.
Fortunately, in the same way that we can take more or less care of our image, inner beauty can also be developed by investing a minimum of time and effort in it. Let’s see it.
Inner beauty is the set of social skills that facilitates the establishment of more or less stable personal ties. If conventional beauty attracts attention, inner beauty is not only capable of attracting attention; It also keeps people up to date with what we do and wants to stay in touch.
Thus, inner beauty is not a quality in itself, but a set of characteristics that are highly valued by others and that influence our ability to socialize and even connect emotionally with others. This is a group of characteristics that lead us to establish emotional bonds that do not always have to be loving, but that usually go hand in hand with affection, empathy and understanding.
How to develop this type of beauty
Below you will find several useful tips on how to develop inner beauty.
1. Make a list of your flaws and strengths
This is a very useful first step to know what the current situation is, At what point in our personal evolution are we? and how much road we have ahead of us. To do this, you can write down on a sheet of paper, in list format and organizing everything in two columns, what your defects and your strengths are, just as you perceive yourself.
Based on the previous action, prioritize which weaknesses you want to work on more to improve, and how you can use your strengths to make it easier. An alternative version of this is to write down how you plan to be even better at what you already excel at, although it is advisable to start with the aspects where you don’t like yourself as much, so that there are no strong imbalances.
2. Make a list of what you think they believe about you
This is a second step to stop and analyze what you should improve and what not from the point of view of others.
To do this, write down two other columns of your strengths and weaknesses, but from the point of view of others in general. It is better not to stick to the criteria of a small group of people, because this would give more strength to the biases and possible prejudices on the part of that group. The idea is to write something that represents “others” in general.
Once the above is done, analyzes to what extent these possible defects are based on something real, and to what extent they are wrong assessments. Think that practically no one outside of you knows you completely, because everyone knows you as long as you relate to each other in a very specific context.
Once this is done, prioritize what you think is most urgent to change about yourself, according to what you think is the opinion of others. Is this similar to what you did in the previous step where you focused on your point of view? From the combination of these two lists, the aspects to work on most to develop inner beauty appear, although you should give more importance to your criteria than that of others.
3. Work on your values
In inner beauty there must always be a series of values that guide us and establish What is it that we want for ourselves and for others?. Being consistent in this aspect helps us connect more and better with others, since it expresses commitment to ideas of the common good.
4. Learn basic communication skills
Many times, the image that others have of us appears damaged by not knowing how to communicate well. Learning these fundamental skills is the most useful thing you can do, even if it takes months or years. Know how to practice active listening, get used to being assertive, make sure the conversations are useful for both … All of this will enrich your social interactions.
Many times, we can overlook what others want or what matters to others. Solving this through practice and constant self-correction allows us to consolidate another of the great pillars of inner beauty: the ability not to think only of oneself.
6. Make your day count
Personal development can be a very powerful source of motivation. Therefore, beyond the time dedicated to your responsibilities, try not to fall into a life surrendered to passivity and free time spent doing nothing (although the latter is important to rest). Read, learn, see new places…anything you think helps you grow as a person.
