How To Express Emotional Pain In An Appropriate Way: 8 Tips
Regardless of our intentions and our interests, our emotions always determine the way we behave. But, although we cannot take total control of our emotional facet, we can modulate the way in which it is expressed. And this is especially important when what happens to us has to do with the so-called negative emotions, which are those linked to psychological discomfort.
Know how to express emotional pain in an appropriate way in our lives and in our personal relationships It is, therefore, very important, because if this task is left unattended, moments of crisis can aggravate the problems in which we find ourselves involved. Outbursts of uncontrolled anger, unjustified hostility, adoption of a paralyzing defeatism… These are psychological states that can sink us even further if we do not manage them well.
Why it is important to express emotional pain in a healthy way
If there is something in which human beings fail when it comes to managing our emotions, it is trying to deny what makes us feel bad. Whatever we do, we will always have experiences that make us suffer, and trying to pretend that they have not occurred or that they do not affect us is not something that helps; on the contrary.
If we try to deny or omit what makes us feel bad, it is more likely that at the least appropriate moment it will make us act in an unexpected way that is difficult to control. Emotions always make their way through our actions and the way we express ourselves, and we better be prepared for them. Modular, even a little, those moments in which our emotional side takes control.
Therefore, if we find ways to channel the emotions linked to psychological discomfort, we will be able to prevent them from being misinterpreted or causing more pain to other people.
How to modulate and express emotional pain well
In order to make your emotions psychologically painful, the following tips can help you.
1. Talk about it with someone close
Being able to fit your own ideas about what you feel with what others think about those ideas helps a lot.
On the one hand, it allows us to verbally express how we feel, and all this in a safe environment in which we feel supported. For the other, allows us to relativize the importance of some events that cause us emotional pain. And, seen from a somewhat more serene and distanced perspective, some events lose dramatic power and we are able to face them in a more constructive way. Having a second or third opinion helps detect those ideas that are based on excessive pessimism.
2. Release tension in a controlled way: do sports
There are painful emotions that lead us to a state of tension and constant alert. To be able to express its effects in an adequate and healthy way, there is nothing like doing sports. If we exercise our muscles, part of this “overload” of energy will be invested in these tasks that require us to control our attention focus well. After these sessions, the emotional pain may still be there, but we will no longer experience it from a feeling of alarm.
3. Have an explanation prepared about what is happening to you
You should consider the possibility of informing the rest of what is happening to you. so that they know how to correctly interpret certain unusual behaviors on your part.
The simple fact of having this information prepared will ensure that you do not avoid facing these situations (improvising a “report” about what is happening to you precisely when you are suffering the consequences of that discomfort is not comfortable and you may prefer not to do it, if necessary).
4. Avoid heated discussions
When we are fully suffering the effects of emotional pain, it is not the time to argue. If there is any indication that conflictive situations may appear, it is worth leaving the discussion for another time. Also, it’s good that you explicitly say that you’re putting off that conversation for exactly that reason. Especially in these situations, honesty is a value to be claimed.
5. Use relaxation techniques
Intervening on physiological processes can greatly reduce anxiety. Doing this, we act on one of the fundamental aspects of behavior and mental state experienced, since reducing anxiety creates a chain reaction that will generally be beneficial.
6. Write a diary
Keeping track of how you feel daily will help you better understand what is happening to you as you express that emotional pain. Rereading those pages will make it easier to work constructively to solve the underlying problem whether by modifying things in your environment or working on your emotions and your philosophy of life.
Binge eating is a common trap that many people who are going through bad times or are prey to anxiety fall into. Eating offers an immediate reward, a sensation of pleasure that allows us to mask for a short period what we would like to forget. Therefore, the best possible trick is to have very systematic control over what you eat, and not expose yourself to temptations. For example, literally stay away from the most addictive food.
8. Remember that no one has the absolute truth
Something that helps a lot to express emotional pain in a healthy way is to be aware that oneself does not have the absolute truth about what is happening. That means anger, sadness, or feeling defeated They are not elements that are there, existing independently of us, as if they were realities that we know and nothing more. We not only know them: we also create them.
