The Danger Of Living With A Narcissistic Personality
In principle, everyone knows that a narcissistic person is someone who is arrogant, arrogant, selfish and a liar.
However, what they have not taught us is that these subjects They can hide behind seemingly affable, seductive and loving personalities. They can and know how to do it. Today’s society, in fact, makes it even easier. Social success, so relatively easy to achieve with a certain skill in social networks, can hide real toxic people.
Why does the narcissistic personality give rise to coexistence problems?
They are, apparently, charming people, the kind that seduce and have a great power of conviction. They are intuitive, detail-oriented and know how to make you feel special. They are people who know how to fall in love.
And they are dangerous. If they can guess what you like, it’s only because they need to receive your admiration. If they are charming, it is because they cannot stand not being the center of attention. If they seduce, it is with the aim of catching you and having you at their feet. If they convince, it is because they have the ability to repeat things so much that they manage to make you doubt even yourself.
And they don’t fall in love, because they are incapable of it.
We are talking about people with narcissistic personality disorder. Luckily, “pure narcissists” are a rare bird; However, people with narcissistic traits are everywhere. Meeting them and sharing some part of your life usually always leads to problems. And falling in love with someone with narcissistic traits, if these are pronounced enough, can seriously harm you.
Seen from the outside, from a distance or in retrospect, it may seem very easy to detect if someone is a narcissist. If he is arrogant and arrogant, if he does not know how to listen and lacks empathy, if he lies, if he has a great need for control… Then he is a narcissist.
We all know the theory and we all think that we will never feel attracted to someone who meets these characteristics. However, no one is out of danger. Because the narcissistic personality, in addition to having all these characteristics that we have numbered, usually has another one: the ability to camouflage.
The public image of the most dangerous narcissist will be impeccable, his capacity for seduction will be so great that his pathology will go completely unnoticed, even in the eyes of his victim.
So much so that the victim of a narcissistic person she will not be able to deduce what is harming her until after a lot of suffering.
2. They trap empathetic people
We have said that no one is out of danger of falling into the network of a narcissistic person, but those who have it most difficult are empathic people.
Empathy is, without a doubt, a virtue. Nevertheless, It is also a double-edged sword, because if you go too far you may end up not being able to find limits when it comes to wanting to help the narcissistic partner. And that is precisely why it is common for narcissistic people to feel attracted to empathic people: they know how to detect that they are going to have their attention for a long time.
The narcissistic person is, by definition, incapable of love. For the simple reason that she doesn’t even love herself. and uA relationship in which one of the two is a narcissistic person will always be a toxic relationship.
The narcissistic person first seduces and then, when he feels that he has already achieved his trophy, he transforms. He will begin to systematically devalue his partner, he will react with anger to everything that does not satisfy him, he will constantly manipulate the situation, he will seriously damage the mental health of the person he claims to love, he will distance him from his friends and make him believe that he is guilty of all the problems.
4. They don’t let you get away from them
The only solution to a toxic relationship is to nip it in the bud. But with a partner with a narcissistic personality this is not so easy to achieve. First, because we have already mentioned that the influence of narcissism can be truly devastating and make you unable to find any way out, at the same time your self-esteem has been deteriorating.
And then, because even having been able to detect the danger and make the decision to get away from it, the narcissistic person will not tolerate a definitive no, he will always have you on his list of victims and when you least expect it he will return. with his best weapons of seduction.
And having been in love with someone and then being able to understand that what he is promising you is impossible to happen (because narcissists don’t change, can’t change), it’s really hard to deal with.
At this point, the recommendation is to ask a professional for help.
5. In most cases, there is no treatment possible
Narcissistic people are, in reality, people with many emotional deficiencies and they often feel depressed and empty. Organizing your life around a lie and not being able to love is not something to be envied. In fact, narcissists are the first victims of their own pathology.
And they have a difficult solution. His own personality makes him unable to change. The most common thing is that he is directly incapable of recognizing himself as a narcissist, and everyone knows that the first step in solving a problem is always being able to recognize it. But even if he were to see himself as he is and agree to go to therapy, he would be unable to find a professional he could trust. Because I couldn’t help but think that the professional is not good enough for someone like him.
Hence the myth: Narcissus drowned in his own image.
Emotional education to combat narcissism
We live in a society that encourages narcissism. Appearance is overvalued, always seeking success is encouraged, likes and followers are pursued, and perfect images are applauded although they have nothing to do with the real images.
We must combat this trend. We must emotionally educate our young people and reinforce social models that break with the dictatorship of appearance and focus on respect, empathy and solidarity.
This is, without a doubt, the great challenge of today’s society.
