What Is SELF-CONTROL: Definition And Techniques

The will is a power that the mind has to direct our actions from day to day. It is formed through a psychological process that takes place in a conscious mental state and enjoying complete freedom of action (there are no forces that force a certain action) by which a response of action or omission is generated in the face of an internal or external stimulus.

Will: definition of the RAE

The RAE Dictionary describes the will, among other meanings, with the following terms:

1. Power to decide and order one’s own conduct.
2. Intention, spirit or resolution to do something.

Following this definition we see that three basic aspects come together in the will:

• The decision to do or not do something.
• An intention to carry out this decision.
• The impulse to execute the action.

Therefore, to know how the will is formed, we will have to focus on these three aspects:

1. Make a decision

People do not act randomly, we do not usually choose our actions at random, especially those that have to do with matters of importance, in these cases we do so after a cognitive reasoning process in which we contrast and evaluate the advantages and disadvantages of the possible behavioral responses (deliberation process) and We choose the one that seems most appropriate to us, the one that brings us the most benefits (for example, whether or not to stop smoking, change or maintain my attitude towards certain situations or people, prepare for competitive exams, look for a new job, change address, etc.). The key to deciding on an option is in the convictionthat is, becoming convinced that, faced with a specific situation or question, the chosen response option is the best possible.

2. The intention to act accordingly

How to act when making a decision? The decision made about something induces a desire to carry it out, a “wanting” to do it. It is a state of mind that predisposes us to act in a certain way. The RAE dictionary defines intention as “the determination of the will in order to an end”. It is defined in a similar way by Franz Brentano (19th century philosopher) who points out: “Intentionality is the common characteristic of all psychological phenomena. It is the property that directs a specific act or event towards an object or goal located in the external world..

It is linked to a proactive attitude and it is usually conditioned by an emotional aspect: the expectation of obtaining a benefit, well-being or pleasure, or the avoidance of harm that is attributed to the stimulus in question. It also depends on the perception we have about the sufficiency of our resources to carry out the chosen action, both psychological (self-knowledge, self-esteem, intelligence, emotional sensitivity, etc.) and material or economic resources that are required under the circumstances and whose lack can nullify the intention (for example: “I know that the decision is the right one, but I don’t feel able to carry it out”; O well: “I don’t have enough financial resources to do it”).

3. The impulse to act

The intention opens the door to execute the decided action and this requires additional energy, an impulse, which is the psychological force that moves the person to carry out a certain action and persist in it until its completion. It is related to motivation, which is a mental state that activates, directs and maintains a person’s behavior towards specific goals or purposes. It involves the activation of proactive psychological forces (illusion, usefulness, obligation, need) but which can be stopped by impeding forces (fear, shame, reluctance, etc.).

What is self-control? Self-control allows us to control important aspects of our daily life: attention, thoughts, emotions, desires and actions (every day we make decisions to resist impulses that “tempt” us with the expectation of obtaining something pleasant). In this sense, we should avoid negative interferences in the process of will formation, overcome temptations that modify or eliminate it and suppress unconscious actions that are beyond our control (manias, ticks, obsessive-compulsive behaviors, verbal expressions and repetitive gestures, inappropriate habits, etc.).

The central question is: to what extent can we control our volitional impulses and put our decisions into practice? It all depends on the willpower and self-control we have to make the decision made or to dominate the tempting impulse that arises from within us. To know how to work on self-control, it is first necessary to know what self-control is and what its components are.

Self-control: definition in psychology

What is personal self-control? The meaning of self-control is the ability of a person to regulate your own behavior, thoughts and feelings.

Kelly McGonigal, health psychologist and expert in neuroscience applied to the relationship between the mind and the body, points out three different aspects within the concept of self-control:

1. The ability to resist temptations.
2. The ability to do what needs to be done.
3. Awareness of long-term goals.

How to learn to have self-control? McGonigal indicates that the most effective way to learn to control ourselves is to understand how and why we lose that control. To do this, he invites us to dissect each of our mistakes: what leads us to give in to a temptation or to leave for tomorrow what we want to do today? How can we transform the knowledge of our failures into strategies to succeed? ?

On the other hand, it must be taken into account that Complex mechanisms intervene in the formation and control of the will. both psychological and physiological, and among them are:

1. Psychological in nature

The will requires a mental state of self-awareness, that is, a mental state in which the person has the self awarenessthat it is she who is thinking, and she is doing it here and now (although in reality situations in which we are not aware of the real factors that influence our evaluations are very common).

Self-awareness is essential to focus attention, analyze information and make a decision. In situations in which it does not predominate (for example, in automatic cognitive processes or in states under the influence of narcotics) will disappears and we lose control of our actions. The importance of consciousness in relation to will is defined by the philosopher of science David Chalmers based on three faculties of consciousness:

1. The deliberate control of behavior.
2. The ability to access your own mental states.
3. Integration of information through a cognitive system.

2. Physiological in nature

Will is a mental phenomenon that arises as a result of a set of underlying biological processes, therefore, the influence of the organic brain structure and its functioning (conditioned by genetics and epigenetic factors) is undeniable. However, will is not determined by genes or biological processes, it depends rather on other mental phenomena such as perception, interpretation, emotionality, attitude, motivation, etc.

The brain structure involved in decision making is centered on prefrontal cortex, which has cognitive functions, and the limbic system that is responsible for the emotional aspects that influence volitional processes. The control function depends on the communication between the two, that is, on the amplitude and directionality of the neuronal connectivity: the greater the intensity of the neuronal connections in the prefrontal cortex direction towards the limbic system, the greater control of their actions the person will have.

According to neuroscientist A. Damasio, systems are located in the prefrontal cortex through which emotion contributes to choice and decision making. It is a function of behavioral regulation through affective information, as it links action alternatives to bodily reactions (rapid heart palpitations and skin sweating) depending on whether they are perceived as pleasant or unpleasant. This implies that the probability of a response will depend, to a certain degree, on the intensity of the force exerted by the emotion associated with the event in question, which will drive the decision towards those behaviors that do not disturb our emotional stability, otherwise feelings will be produced. of guilt, irritation, shame, frustration, etc. (exposure to an emotionally charged stimulus can override our rational cognitive system and lead us to impulsive actions).

There are distortions that affect the will formation process. During the training process, factors inherent to the person or induced by the environment may appear that introduce modifications or paralyze it. Leaving aside those that escape rational control (invincible obfuscation, uncontrollable passion, alcoholism and drug addiction, etc.) and following the previous scheme, the most common are:

1. Lack of conviction

If we are not fully convinced of the goodness of the chosen action, it will be very likely that we will give up carrying it out. Doubts generate insecurity and reduce expectations about the expected result. Doubts may arise:

• About the appropriateness of the chosen action, considering the consequences that could occur if the expected result does not occur (“if it goes wrong it will be a disaster”; “maybe it is not the right time”; “I should think about it again”).
• About personal capacity or the sufficiency of available resources. (“it may not be worth it”; “it is very difficult to get it”; “I won’t be able to do it”; “I don’t have the means”; “I’m ashamed”).

One of the dangers of doubt is that it opens the door to persuasion, suggestion and seduction, which are processes intended to direct or change a person’s attitude, behavior or emotions toward something or someone by using words to convey new information or new reasoning. They are instruments that social agents (companies, politicians, religious leaders) use to modify our choices and direct them in favor of their interests, which is why we have to come to the conviction that our decision is the correct one, since a person fully convinced of something It is difficult to manipulate.

2. Lack of sufficient motivation

Motivation is associated with the value that the result of the action has for us, so that The more satisfaction and benefits it brings us, the more excited we will be. in getting it. When the pleasant expectations about the expected result are overcome by the difficulties that this entails (whether real or imaginary), we insist on finding excuses not to carry it out and apathy and its main allies appear: laziness, apathy, procrastination. , prejudices, etc., even self-deception, which induce the mind itself to invent a justification to delay or cancel the chosen action (we ask ourselves: is it really necessary? Is there no other option? What if it doesn’t work? OK? Should I wait for more information?

3. Conflict between reason and emotion

In many actions, emotional forces tend to come together, both positive (love, enthusiasm, altruism, responsibility, obligation, etc.) and negative (fear, anger, shame, jealousy, etc.) that affect our decision by promoting or rejecting it. The struggle between what reason tells us we should do and what emotion prompts us to do (especially when it is under the domination of passions) generates internal tensions that can modify the will and suppress action (such as the fear of suffering physical pain in a medical test or the shame of speaking in public).

In this aspect, psychologist Leon Festinger’s theory of cognitive dissonance can be framed, which refers to the discomfort, tension or anxiety that people experience when their beliefs or attitudes conflict with what they do (for example, we know that we should punish to our son, but in the end we don’t do it because we feel bad). This displeasure can lead to an attempt to change beliefs or attitudes (even leading to self-deception) to reduce the discomfort they produce (a typical example is that of the smoker who says: “smoking two or three cigarettes a day is not harmful”).

How to control impulses? How to exercise self-control? Following our approach, to strengthen the will it is necessary to know in which step of the will formation process we are most vulnerable: in the lack of conviction; in the insecurity that weakens the intention; in the lack of energy for the impulse or in the emotional force that dominates our will at a given moment. By virtue of these four factors, the strategies can be grouped as follows: self-control techniques and exercises to maintain self-control:

1. Believe in your decision

How to have self-control? Strengthening the belief that the decision made is the most convenient. We must consider all the elements that affect the issue to be decided:

• Sufficiency, veracity and coherence of the information obtained from it
• Evaluation of available resources
• Assessment of consequences

Based on all this, carry out a reasoning process appropriate to the circumstances that will lead us to obtain arguments that confirm the validity of the decision taken. The full conviction that the chosen response is the most appropriate drives the intention to carry it out by eliminating or reducing doubts about it.

Psychologist and Nobel Prize winner Daniel Kahneman points out that we make decisions based on two systems of reasoning:

• he implicitwhich is intuitive, fast, automatic, frequent, emotional, stereotyped and subconscious (typical of impulsive or vehement people)
• and the explicitwhich is slow, logical, calculating and conscious (sometimes it is too slow, as in indecisive or insecure people).

Most of our daily decisions follow the implicit system, which is more likely to make errors (these usually appear unnoticed by our conscious mind). However, when the explicit system intervenes, in which we invest greater cognitive effort, the probabilities of making the correct decision are greater.

2. Get motivated

Another self-control technique consists of obtaining enough energy to initiate the volitional impulse towards action. For it we will focus attention only on the incentives of it, that is, in the benefits that we will obtain if we execute it, which act as the axis of motivation, projecting them repeatedly in our mind until the reluctance to initiate the determined action is eliminated (for example, if we have the illusion of take a trip but the laziness to organize it is an obstacle, we will have to mentally insist on the exciting aspects that prompted us to think about the trip). In this sense, we should ask ourselves if we are considering all the benefits or advantages that the action would bring or are we only taking into account a few, since there may be other incentives that we have not taken into account.

On the other hand, without prejudice to the different cognitive-behavioral techniques applicable, they can be used as simple and easy to apply self-control training techniques:

3. Use self-instructions

Self-verbalizations or self-instructions are a system of “talking to oneself” to give yourself some guidelines of behavior, thus favoring the internalization of mental processes (it is about using the role of language due to its ability to replace direct experience). How to improve self-control? When a tempting thought appears towards something desirable and that involves doing something that we should not or not doing what we should, we must recover the self-conscious Self so that it pushes aside this other tempting and foolish Self and tell ourselves: Why am I thinking about doing (or not doing) this if it’s not what I had decided? We have to learn to tell ourselves: “I have to do what I have decided, because it is right and it is good for me, so: GO FORWARD, I must not go back.”O well: “STOP I shouldn’t do it”. To promote the learning of this technique, Donald Meichenbaum’s model for cognitive-behavioral modification can be used as a reference. Here you will find more information about Meichenbaum’s self-instruction training.

These instructions consist of a self-control exercise and must be repeated every time we are faced with this type of situation, and over time, they will become a habit or pattern of behavior that will act spontaneously and unconsciously (a series of research has shown that resisting repeated temptations has an impact on the mind by increasing neuronal connections in the direction of the prefrontal cortex towards the amygdala). Behavioral training can also be done, to encourage appropriate ones and eliminate those that are not. It is done with small challenges (not eating something like that, not smoking after eating, getting up as soon as the alarm goes off, etc.) and little by little we increase the level of the challenge to be overcome.

4. Practice concentration

This exercise to develop self-control consists of training to help us control and focus attention. An example can be keep attention in a mental image and avoid distractions for an increasingly longer time (mindfulness technique). This practice increases the focus of our mind on the self-conscious Self, which is the mental state with which we control our will. Meditation has proven to be one of the most effective ways to increase willpower. Research on it indicates that three hours of meditation increases self-control and the ability to concentrate, and after eleven hours of mediation practice you can see visible changes in the brain (meditation increases blood flow in the prefrontal cortex and also , it seems that neural connections between the areas responsible for self-control are improved).

5. Reward yourself

How to improve self-control? Another of the most effective self-control techniques consists of reinforce successes. Exercising control of the will is sometimes difficult and painful, especially because it involves a fight against ourselves: our sensible Self against the tempting Self, which is why it needs continuous reinforcement, that is, in addition to the satisfaction and well-being achieved. , it is also advisable to give yourself a self-reward for each success achieved in this control (a prize, a small pleasure, etc.). It is evident that the mastery of the will requires a considerable effort, it implies the mastery of reason in the face of the stimuli that the environment presents to us, but whoever achieves it exalts his person, provides security and self-confidence (improves self-esteem) and He feels stronger because he perceives that he controls his life and enjoys freedom.

In the following article you will find more emotional self-control techniques.

This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to What is self-control: definition and techniques we recommend that you enter our Cognitive Psychology category.