Social anxiety is a response of intense fear or discomfort when faced with interaction situations with other people. This can manifest itself in many ways, such as fear of being judged, of doing something embarrassing, or even just starting a conversation. This type of anxiety affects both personal and professional lives, and learning to manage it is crucial to being able to interact freely in the world in which we live.
What is social anxiety and why does it appear?
Social anxiety is a form of anxiety characterized by excessive worry about how one is perceived. This fear of judgment can cause the person to feel physical symptoms (such as sweating or tachycardia) and cognitive symptoms (such as thoughts of self-reproach). In essence, the brain perceives interactions as “risk situations” and responds with an anxiety alarm that becomes an obstacle to interaction.
Strategies to manage social anxiety
There are several techniques that can help you manage social anxiety effectively and regain self-confidence in interaction situations.
1. Work on and tolerate your intrusive thoughts
One of the main challenges in social anxiety is self-criticism and intrusive thoughts that generate insecurity. People with social anxiety often struggle with distorted thoughts such as “I’m sure I’m making a fool of myself” or “everyone will notice that I’m nervous.” A key tool is learning to identify these thoughts and question their validity.
To do this, it can help you to think about whether you have objective evidence that confirms these beliefs or if you are being too harsh on yourself. Instead of resisting or trying to eliminate these thoughts, it is also important to accept that they will appear and that they are normal. By focusing on tolerating the discomfort that these thoughts produce, you reduce their power and allow them to weaken over time..
2. Practice gradual exposure to feared situations
Gradual exposure is an effective technique for dealing with anxiety, as it allows the brain to get used to situations that initially seem intimidating. The key is to approach each situation progressively, starting with less intimidating interactions and increasing the level of exposure as you feel more comfortable.
For this I recommend that you make a list of the situations that intimidate us and in each of them add progressive levels from lower level of anxiety to higher level of anxiety. Go over the levels little by little by practicing exposure and thus lowering the anxiety levels of each of the situations.
3. Develop communication skills
Many people with social anxiety fear running out of topics of conversation or making inappropriate comments. Developing communication skills improves confidence in these situations. One of the easiest to practice may be active listening, which allows me to show interest in the events in other people’s lives and maintain a fluid conversation.
4. Breathing exercises to reduce the anxiety response
Anxiety causes an acceleration in breathing and heart rate. Practicing breathing exercises will help you calm your nervous system when you feel anxiety increasing. There are different ways to do it, including apps that can help you with your breathing exercises.. Regularly practicing breathing exercises will help us calm down and if we do it before social situations that do not generate stress or anxiety, they will help us go into them more calmly.
5. Practice self-compassion
Self-compassion involves treating yourself as kindly as you would a friend.. Social anxiety often makes people hard on themselves, so cultivating self-compassion can help reduce self-criticism and shame.
I recommend that in social situations in which you begin to question and criticize yourself, you imagine answering yourself as if you were doing it with your best friend, trying to be kinder and finding the reason why perhaps I made that mistake or have come to think differently. that way.
6. Visualization of successful situations
Before facing a situation that causes anxiety, visualize a positive outcome. Imagining that you feel calm and in control reduces the likelihood that anxious thoughts will dominate your mind. Find a place where you feel calm and after relaxing, practice visualizing that moment that generates so much social anxiety and being successful..
This type of visualization reinforces a sense of confidence and helps mitigate negative thoughts.
7. Ask for professional support
If social anxiety persists and significantly affects your life, seeking support from a therapist can be very helpful. Therapy offers structured techniques that help identify thought patterns, challenge irrational beliefs, and develop tools to manage anxiety in social situations.
In conclusion
Social anxiety is a common experience, but it can be overcome with a gradual approach and specific practices. Controlled exposure, developing communication skills, and self-compassion are key steps to reconnecting in a healthy and balanced way with others. Working on each of these areas will allow you to advance at your own pace and regain confidence in social environments, so you can enjoy interactions without the weight of anxiety.