Anxiety, as you have probably read in other articles, is an emotional state that our brain generates as an adaptive response when faced with stressful and/or threatening situations because they could bring pain, discomfort, loss, insecurity, economic deprivation, etc.
This state is felt on a physiological level with nerves, palpitations, rapid breathing, sweating, tremors, feeling of tiredness, weakness, inability to concentrate or not being able to think about anything other than what is worrying us, insomnia, gastrointestinal problems, and avoidance. of the situation.
So that, Anxiety is the fear response we feel in a situation or the consequence of it of that context of events that logically we do not want to face due to the changes it represents.
Fear is a natural emotion in all people when faced with the feeling of uncertainty The common denominator of threatening situations is usually not knowing what to do, what to say, lack of control, not having the tools, skills or abilities to face or solve that situation; Then we feel worried and therefore we cannot stop thinking about it, which makes us uncomfortable and we cannot think clearly to find a way to deal with it.
There is also that discomfort produced by fears that are more subtle, more personal, and that each person feels according to their experience and different experiences. What has suffered in some situation that is similar to what is now presented and to which the brain sends us this alert, because From experience, in a similar situation, we have suffered a lot, and we do not want to repeat it
This anxiety can also be the fear of feeling sadness or anger, because we have concepts about these emotions that we relate to people we do not want to be like, because at the time they were classified as victims or complainers, or have beliefs such as that we must be strong. and strong people don’t break down.
These fears have the function of protecting us, because they are showing us that there is a situation or emotional discomfort that must be resolved or attended to.
An experience linked to change
On the other hand, anxiety is presented as an indicator of changes to living conditions that, due to our way of seeing life, we associate with failure, with psychological states that we reject because we see them as a symptom of weakness or vulnerability. It is possible to feel anxious about being in a situation where we are victims, and we relate that to toxic or weak people, for example.
Besides, Anxiety can even appear when faced with new experiences that are good and bring fantastic things with them: a new love, entrepreneurship, pregnancy… Situations in which we feel afraid for not knowing how to respond to them because they are new, and we do not know how to face them because we do not have the tools or skills to respond and learn to live with them, most likely influenced by the idea of not being able to face them, perhaps also because we do not feel completely deserving of what happens to us.
Each person is different and we cannot generalize with ideas and messages from others that seem to magically solve anxious states. That is why it is important that, in the presence of anxiety, we review the context and understand if it is an external or internal cause that is causing it, and that preferably accompanied by a psychotherapist, treat the discomfort in a personalized way, to confront the situation. or the emotion that is generating it and undertake the best way to solve it.
And what do I do if I have anxiety?
Ignoring anxiety and starting to meditate is what should not be done because by not wanting to assume how we feel and “intelligently manage emotion” believing that “everything is in the mind” we are invalidating ourselves, leaving ourselves in the background, affirming that we are not important enough for ourselves, and This form of inattention and lack of love causes much more pain and more anguish.
Focus on what message your body is transmitting to you through that shape, on how it feels. Is it telling you that there is a problem? That there is the possibility of a problem or that you are living in a way that is not consistent with your values and the way you feel? Are you facing a situation where you have no control? Or that you are facing a new experience that you don’t have the tools or skills to face? Are you not allowing yourself to feel and cry because you associate it with weakness?
Anxiety as a response to certain circumstances can be channeled First, from understanding the situation and verifying that it is normal to feel this way, giving space to drain the emotions. We feel relief when we can answer why this affects us in this way.
Acceptance is key Accept that life is about having ups and downs, that feeling is an inherent part of being alive and that we cannot control everything, that inopportune situations are going to happen because life deals at random and that it is okay not to be prepared to face them, that that It doesn’t make us weak. Paying attention to what causes us discomfort and what hurts us is what we should do, it is like when our stomach hurts and we go to the doctor, we focus on the pain and discomfort to seek the appropriate treatment.
The best antidote for anxiety is pay attention to you with love how you pay attention to a child to understand what is happening to him, because seeing him in pain hurts you and you want to help him, in addition to making decisions and acting on the context that causes the discomfort.
Above all, seek therapeutic assistance to have a person who will help you understand and find solutions, who will accompany you and support you in these moments where everything looks gray and few things seem to make sense.
