Emotionally Dependent People: Their 8 Characteristics
Emotionally dependent people are an example of the extent to which some individuals are able to unite their lives with that of others. And although on the surface we all seem free, chaining ourselves to the decisions of others can become habitual; in some cases, to clearly harmful extremes.
In this article we will review the characteristics that define emotionally dependent people and the habits and signs that indicate the presence of this pattern of thought and behavior.
In theory, all human beings are unique, unrepeatable and with a constant personality; However, that does not mean that our way of thinking, feeling and acting is not deeply influenced by our interaction with others.
In most cases, the influence that an individual has on another person is limited, sometimes becoming somewhat deeper due to persuasion. However, some people are more likely to develop emotional bonds of dependence on others. In this case, your actions are totally mixed with the actions of that other person.
How to recognize These signs that indicate that we are dealing with an emotionally dependent person ? The main ones are the ones you can read below.
1. Feelings of inferiority and low self-esteem
This is a constant in emotionally dependent people. They are cruel to themselves, They have a very damaged self-image and their style of attributing causes to what happens to them leads them to blame themselves when something bad happens and attribute everything to luck or others when something good happens to them.
Thus, this low self-esteem makes it natural to seek the protection and guidance of some authority figure, someone who can watch over you and lead your life to a successful conclusion.
2. Doubtful attitude
Emotionally dependent people constantly doubt, and their actions are marked by indecision. The reason is not simply a lack of assertiveness (you can be assertive by being clear about what you want) but simply not believing in your own criteria to set goals.
In the context of relationships as a couple or friends, for example, this means that adopts a passive role and action is taken only when the other person has clearly indicated the lines to follow.
3. Feeling of guilt
This characteristic is also explained by the previous two, and consists of the ease with which emotionally dependent people assume that the bad things that happen around them are their fault. For example, if your partner is frustrated because she hasn’t achieved one of her work goals for the day, they believe they haven’t given her enough support.
This characteristic makes it easy for them to assume situations of abuse directed against them as normal, since They blame themselves for the anger that gives way to violence
4. Belief in romantic love
In Western societies, emotionally dependent people believe intensely in romantic love, since it expresses the definitive bond of dependence between two people. In practice, this means that the other person has clear power over them, since the challenge of staying with them even though they break their commitments is an incentive in itself.
This type of person is also characterized by investing whatever is necessary in the emotional bonds that they have already created. That’s why, They tend to sacrifice themselves over and over again for other people , even if it is not reciprocal (something that is common). This is not done freely, as a result of reflection, but systematically, and as a reaction to the fear caused by breaking contact with that person.
In some way, the personal relationships of the emotionally dependent person mortgage them, making them less free in the future.
6. Fear of loneliness
Loneliness is something terrifying for emotionally dependent people, and that is why they bet everything on being united to someone. They do this through great sacrifices in order to be accepted and, in general, to be relevant to someone. The result is disastrous, because They have a reason to constantly deny their autonomy and complying with the demands of others.
7. Submission
Another of the fundamental characteristics of this psychological profile is submission and accommodating character. They fear the idea of ​​exhausting the patience of those with whom they are emotionally attached, and They try to satisfy all demands ; sometimes even needs that have not been expressed.
8. Difficulty perceiving manipulation
Emotionally dependent people often fall into manipulation because of the characteristics mentioned above. In these situations, they do not recognize that they are being manipulated, since that would cause them to fall into cognitive dissonance: the idea of ​​the other person taking advantage of the situation clashes with the belief that maintaining that relationship is beneficial.
