Every day people like you and me come to therapy (or coaching sessions), confused, overwhelmed or affected by this endless situation.
The most unexpected emotional contradictions invade us without mercy, caused by misinformation (excessive at times and contradictory and inaccurate at other times), and by the difficulty we have with these circumstances of recovering the way of life we had and now long for.
We feel sadness and discouragement many times, and with more intensity than we are used to. Anxiety takes over our peace and engulfs us in unpleasant sensations of fear and chaos.
Stress sneaks into our lives without asking permission and our cortisone often reacts to the point of making us sick.
Anger and rage take the reins of our daily lives more often than we would like.
The physical and emotional fatigue, generated by the inevitable departure from our comfort zone, takes its toll on each of us in one way or another.
The frustration of seeing our life projects “on pause” leads many people to despair.
There are many young students, or those looking for work, who do not see the horizon of their professional careers There are a large number of couples who have stopped their cohabitation or marriage project due to the chaotic reality of COVID-19. Thousands of professionals and entrepreneurs, from multiple sectors, have seen their expectations and their businesses collapse with incalculable emotional pain.
Many children and adolescents are immersed in the silent fear of having to go to school with the possibility of getting sick or bringing home the illness and in some cases the death of a loved one (this is how they think about it in silence).
Many of our young people are betting on a dream abroad (work, Erasmus, studies.) “stuck in time” seeing how their projects have been interrupted without a date or calendar.
The whole society is damaged, some facing evidence of losses and others with silent but very toxic suffering. It is a suffering capable of sinking anyone’s emotional fleet, regardless of their strengths or abilities to manage emotions in the past. It is a suffering that does not discriminate against people, social classes, intellects, self-esteem, beliefs, circumstances. It devastates without looking back and leaves the feeling of restlessness in the corners of life, of this life that we are living here and now.
The need to adapt to the present
The implacable virulence with which this disease is destroying our dreams leaves no other way out than reinvent our model of living life This year is the year of learning to live in the present and learning new ways to live fully.
Therapists and coaches are helping each person discover, recognize and strengthen those personal and psychological resources that they already have, but do not see. We also help those who do not know where to get strength from, or how to increase self-confidence. We help them unlearn old behavior patterns and we help them manage their emotions for their happiness.
We all have the inner strength necessary to face this and many other moments in life. It is a matter of looking within ourselves and listening carefully to what happens to us in order to make the necessary decisions to improve our daily lives.
The key is to accept the reality we have and focus on the small details that make our lives easier and more pleasant. If we can change the “complaint” mode to the “gratitude” mode we will have enough energy to stabilize ourselves and enjoy life as it is now.
Our lesson as a society, and as human beings, is to learn to convert our here and now into unique, exceptional moments and create a reality according to our needs to achieve well-being.
To compensate for the psycho-affective loss of social distancing in our lives we can introduce small gestures that will be our great allies To do this, a good option is to recover sensory stimuli, in this way we will be able to reset our brain.
Definitely…
Masks have robbed us of the images of people’s faces and with them the affective messages of a smile or facial gestures of acceptance, joy and other codes of non-verbal language. They also prevent us from developing our sense of smell and prevent us from capturing the smells that generate so much well-being for us due to their affective connotations. I suggest that you use fragrances and air fresheners that evoke nature, the sea, pine trees, flowers, etc.
Social distance prolonged over time is isolating us and each time we are closing ourselves in the small circle that is allowed to us.
The proposal in this case is be careful not to lose contact with our friends, groups or social networks, but not to feed back toxic emotions that are on the surface (anger, sadness, fear, indignation…), but to strengthen the emotional ties that a simple virus can take away from us.
We are in the era of present consciousness. Let’s accept reality, be grateful for what we have, add to the lives of others and create a day to day savoring the small moments.
At the end of all, this pandemic reality invites us to live, since it shows us human vulnerability and that our final destiny is to die. Let’s live without fear of life, it’s the only thing we have.
