Appreciative coaching is a type of coaching that is based on appreciative inquiry a change methodology that helps discover the strengths of a person, group or organization, and that helps recognize, capitalize and use those beliefs and behaviors that are and have been useful.
It focuses on what we want most, and not on what we don’t want, and it focuses on living appreciating, living feeling gratitude for everything that life brings us.
Understanding appreciative coaching
This week, Miriam Subirana, collaborator of the Mensalus Psychological and Psychiatric Assistance Institute, talks to us about appreciative coaching and the power of the image.
Sometimes we are closed in a vision that does not allow us to move forward, a construction that only values the negative part of reality. What can we do in these cases?
We live in a reality created by our conversations and the stories we tell each other. If these stories contemplate the negative part of life, it may be difficult for us to connect with the other positive part that pushes us to make a change.
Appreciative coaching focuses attention on that other part that the person is losing sight of. Instead of dwelling on the problem, the coach suggests imagining what we would do if the conflict did not exist. The objective is to visualize another more positive scenario.
Everything is based on the power of the image. For example, if I come home every day thinking that I will be bored with my partner, it will be difficult for me to find a fun time together. Well, as coaches we could ask the following question:
In this case, the person would begin to respond to situations in which they would laugh and, not only that, they could visualize themselves in this jovial and relaxed state that they have not experienced for a long time. Through appreciative coaching we accompany the individual on a journey towards the imagination of dreams so that their attitude in the here and now changes.
Is it easy to have a clear image of what we want to change?
Not always. In fact, this is one of the basic points to discuss. If we do not have a clear image of what we want to change, it will be very difficult to implement the work areas for the change.
Change happens because there is an attractive element that pushes us towards action or because the discomfort generated by “non-change” is unbearable (in this second case it does not matter whether there is an image of the future or not). Well, the problem appears when the discomfort is not unbearable but there is no attractive future image. So… What moves us?
Here arises the need to create a dream.
And to draw this dream, what can help us?
In this case, the therapist or coach is in charge of asking questions that help the individual reflect on themselves. One of the elements we use to establish a dialogue is the language of abundance instead of the language of lack.
The language of abundance seeks what we want to gain from the dream. For example, in the case of those people who want to stop smoking, the usual speech responds to “I have to stop smoking” (an obligation). From appreciative coaching we would ask “what do you want to gain if you don’t smoke?” Visualizing this desire will help the person build a positive image.
Likewise, we will also place special emphasis on highlighting the strengths that the protagonist possesses. Searching for the resources that were useful in the past and connecting again with those situations (continuing with the first example, we could help the person detect moments in which they laughed and were nourished by others, including their husband) evokes feelings necessary for change.
In short, we understand that appreciative coaching focuses on the dialogue of what we want instead of what we do not want, is that correct?
TRUE. Instead of focusing on the problem, we focus on what would happen if it did not exist. Appreciative coaching seeks the positive vital core, that which gives life to the person. Once said nucleus is detected, it makes it grow. And how does he do it? As we mentioned, through the power of the positive image, the language of abundance and the connection with one’s own strengths.
What message would you like to convey to our readers before ending this interview?
Images create worlds. We generate the reality we live with the images in which we believe and project ourselves. The change begins in the images we have of the future.
Appreciating and recognizing the best of “what is” awakens our positivity. Let us not forget that every human being needs to be appreciated and recognized. When we appreciate, we move forward: our mind opens to receive and learn.
To live appreciating is to feel gratitude for everything that life brings us. Whether positive or negative, good or bad, we can decide to see the positive side that helps us value and progress.
