Common Communication Problems Between Parents and Adolescents

Adolescence is a stage of change that is fundamental in psychological development; However, it is also a time in our lives when it is relatively common for us to experience poor forms of communication with the rest of the family, something that produces all kinds of problems between parents and children.

This is due, in part, to the fact that in a matter of relatively few months young people go from having the behavior of their parents as a reference point to almost having the behavior of other young people their age as a reference point, especially those who are somewhat older. This rapid change is disruptive in family dynamics and clashes with what fathers and mothers expected of their sons and daughters until that moment.

To better understand this type of phenomenon, here we will talk about common communication problems between parents and their adolescent children

The main communication problems between adolescents and their parents

These are the most frequent types of communication blocks between adolescents and their parents.

1. Communication deficits due to a mismatch in expectations

As we have anticipated, there are many families who are slow to accept that the little one in the house is no longer a child and He has entered a stage that will transform him physically and mentally

As this change occurs quickly, it is very common for difficulties to arise in understanding what he does, says or thinks, simply because parents analyze his actions from the framework of interpretation that they used when he was still in childhood. It is difficult to get rid of those inertias.

2. Lack of understanding of your friends

The type of friendships that are formed during adolescence is another reason that generates discomfort in the relationship between parents and adolescent children, generally due to the fear that these young people are a bad influence, that is, the fear that these new friendships could lead the son or daughter down a path of bad habits drugs, vandalism, etc.

We must not forget that adolescents insistently seek autonomy in their free time, and tend not to want to explain everything they do. This lack of information leads many parents to adopt a hypervigilant attitude and interpret what adolescents do in a pessimistic way.

3. Differences in the way of seeing life

It’s not just age differences that matter; There are also important generational differences that can cause you to open up. a cultural gap between adolescents and their parents Many middle-aged people have problems understanding what their children say, simply due to their use of neologisms, terms that emerge from Internet memes, etc.

Furthermore, during adolescence it is common for the child to develop their own political and ideological convictions which do not always have to coincide with those of their parents or family.

This divergence of opinions can generate conflicts and discussions in the long run on all those topics on which one does not agree with the child, a fact that causes a lot of discomfort in family coexistence.

4. Decrease in time spent with family

Adolescence is a stage in which it is necessary for the child to establish a series of limits with respect to his parents and the world around him, creating personal spaces in which to enjoy a certain intimacy

However, when the child withdraws too much from his parents and progressively stops spending time with his family, real problems of communication and coexistence occur that must be solved so that the adolescent does not feel left out and the parents recover. to his son.

5. Disrespect

In the most extreme cases, adolescents can channel their frustrations through disrespect towards their parents, given that these types of attacks are more normalized in their age group.

Obviously, in cases like this communication is greatly hampered. No relationship can be positive if it is not based on respect and cordiality and that also includes the relationships between parents and their adolescent children, a stage in which respect and emotional support are necessary more than ever.

To do?

At the time of improve communication between adolescents and parents keep these key ideas in mind:

• Do not prejudge, understand that adolescents have developed their own generational culture and that this makes sense within their logic.
• Respect the fact that he will need much more privacy than during childhood.
• Don’t just bombard him with questions or he will become defensive, establish conversations in which you also contribute.
• Explain your point of view about why you care about what he does, showing your more human side.
• If everything gets too complicated, seek professional psychological help.

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