Nowadays, more and more couples make the decision not to be parents. When both agree, they continue the relationship without problems. However, when one of the two wants to be a parent and the other does not, the conflict is usually quite big. So if you’re wondering why I don’t want to have children with my partner? Surely you will be in that complicated situation where both are dissatisfied with the other’s decision. There are many reasons why a person makes the decision not to have children, which we will explain in this article. Another thing you have to consider is that if you really want to have children but not with your partner since it is very different. Whatever your case, we are going to briefly analyze it and present a series of recommendations to take into account that can help you ensure that your decision affects your relationship as little as possible.
In this PsychologyFor article: why I don’t want to have children with my partner we are going to explain in a simple way the main reasons and some recommendations.
5 possible reasons why I don’t want to have children with my partner
As we mentioned above, there are many reasons why you may be choosing not to have children with your partner. Below we are going to briefly explain some of the most common ones.
You have children with your previous partner
You probably already had the experience of being a father (mother), so having children again is not your priority now, no matter how much you love your current partner.
You don’t feel prepared
It may be the case that you do not feel emotionally mature enough and you fear that you will not be able to provide your child with the education and treatment you would like. Another reason why you might not feel prepared is the economic situation and/or lack of time, because you are in a job where you have to work for many hours, and you do not have the financial solvency at this time. that you need to support a child and/or that you do not feel safe with your partner in that aspect since they do not have economic stability either.
Health issues
It could be the case that you or your partner are not in good physical health and having a baby poses a great risk to your life.
Fear of losing individual and couple freedom
Another reason why you do not want to have children with your partner is that you feel that by having them you will lose your ability to act freely, that you will not be able to do what you want because you will have someone who will always depend on you. . You may also be worried about the fact that you will have less time to do things with your partner such as going on a trip, going out, or just spending time together doing nothing.
You don’t see yourself in the long term with your partner
If you don’t see yourself with your partner long-term and you have many doubts about your relationship, it is normal that even if you would like to have children, you don’t want to do it with your current partner. The decision to have children is sometimes not easy, but when you decide to do so it is because although we know that there is always the possibility of a future breakup, at least in these moments you want to continue with the couple for a long time.
Recommendations and advice
If you do not want to have children with your partner for whatever reason, you need to take into account some tips that could help you so that this decision affects your relationship as little as possible as well as your own emotional well-being.
The first thing you should do is Think seriously about your decision Ask yourself if it really is what you want or if you can change your mind in the future.
After being clear about whether your decision is momentary or not, it is necessary that regardless of what it is, you talk about it openly with your partner and express your wishes from the beginning. In the vast majority of cases, the problems begin not with the fact that one of the two does not want to have children but with not having clarified this important decision from the beginning.
It is important do not create false expectations in the other person since sometimes because of not arguing with the partner and even for fear of losing them, they begin to drag their feet when in reality they never want to have children. For example, when you tell the other person that right now you don’t want to have children but that later you do, knowing that that moment will never really come. Communication between couples is a fundamental piece in relationships.
If the reason why you do not want to have children with your partner is that you are not sure you want to continue the relationship, it is necessary that you do an analysis as soon as possible about what you want and you make a decision It is advisable not to let so much time pass if you know that you are not really in love with that person.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Why I don’t want to have children with my partner we recommend that you enter our Couples Therapy category.
