How To Help A Person With Anxiety: 7 Tips On What To Do
All or almost all of us have felt anxious at some point in our lives. So, we know that this state of discomfort, restlessness, hyperarousal and nervousness is highly punitive and aversive, and is generally something we do not want to experience.
Now, getting out of a state of anxiety may not be as easy as it seems. In fact, it is something complicated, especially if what it gives us is an anxiety crisis. Let us now imagine that the person suffering from it is not us, but another person we care about. What can we do? How to help a person with anxiety? Let’s talk about it throughout this article full of tips to keep in mind.
In order to think about how to help a person with anxiety, we must first know and understand the type of situation they are going through. And that is why a brief explanation of what anxiety is can be useful.
We give the name anxiety to a state of deep subjective discomfort of emotional origin characterized by the presence of strong negative affect together with a high level of activity or physiological activation, which in turn has an effect on behavior.
We are facing a state that is usually defined as an apprehensive reaction that appears without the need for a threatening situation to currently exist, but that does tends to be linked to the anticipation of a future threat or an overflow or inability to cope with environmental demands, although its origin is not always aware.
It is important to keep in mind that in anxiety there is an interaction between a subjective or cognitive-emotional component, which allows the perception of emotions and the state of discomfort, a biological or physiological component in which the emotional affectation generates a series of physical symptoms (the most common being palpitations, tachycardia and acceleration of respiratory rate, although there may be others such as pain, dry mouth, sweating or tremors) and finally a behavioral component that includes the set of actions that are carried out in said state. .
Anxiety attacks
The existence of a certain level of stress and anxiety is common in our society, but the truth is that anxiety can often rise to such an extent that it can overwhelm us, sometimes even in a surprising way and without prior warning. . This is the case of what happens to us when we have an anxiety crisis.
In these crises, great discomfort suddenly arises and panic appears along with palpitations and tachycardia, feeling of suffocation and hyperventilation, abdominal or chest pain, dizziness sweating, tremors, feeling of having a heart attack, dying, going crazy or losing control of one’s body.
It is also common for a feeling of strangeness and unreality to appear, known as depersonalization.
Therefore, when helping a person with anxiety who is going through a stage with frequent crises, it is important to know that you have to intervene both during these and when they are not occurring, to prevent them
Anxiety is not an uncommon emotion or reaction. In fact, most people have felt some degree of anxiety throughout their lives, and a high percentage of the world’s population has experienced or will experience a anxiety crisis at some point in their lives.
It it is not pathological in itself , but sometimes the persistence of anxiety or its repeated appearance, whether or not linked to some type of situation or stimulation, can become a highly disabling disorder. And in fact, the set of anxiety disorders is the most common type of disorder that exists, along with major depression.
There are many anxiety disorders, but probably the best known are panic disorder and generalized anxiety disorder.
In the first, the subject repeatedly suffers several episodes of anxiety crises, which generates the appearance of anticipatory anxiety about the possible appearance of a new crisis, which generally leads him to change his way of life and even to avoid exposing yourself to common situations in which you think you could experience them again
In generalized anxiety disorder, symptoms such as restlessness, fatigue, irritability, tension, sleep problems and inability to relax appear, derived from the existence of anxiety due to worries about multiple aspects of life or even a continuing nonspecific and general concern
In addition to these, other disorders such as phobias as a whole are also linked to anxiety, as well as other disorders such as obsessive disorders.
Likewise in depression, bipolar disorder or acute stress or post-traumatic stress disorders it is also common. In fact anxiety It is usually common in multiple psychiatric and psychological problems
How to help in case of an anxiety crisis
As you can imagine from its description, an anxiety or anguish crisis is a very disabling phenomenon that tends to make the focus of the sufferer’s attention focus on the symptoms themselves. Likewise, it is easy for the symptoms to be confused with those of a heart problem, something that causes people to live in great fear.
Helping a person in this situation is not easy when we are already immersed in it , although it is possible. How to do it?
The way to help would be to try to reduce the focus on discomfort or reduce some of the more controllable physiological symptoms, such as breathing. Likewise, we must remember that anxiety attacks They usually have a relatively short duration, lasting a few minutes so they end up disappearing on their own.
Below we will see some small indications to take into account if we meet someone in the middle of an anxiety crisis. Of course, it is important to keep in mind that first of all it must be ruled out that it is a true heart attack.
1. Don’t tell him to calm down
It is relatively common that when a person goes into a panic attack or an anxiety crisis, others do not know how to react. In this sense, it is common for them to try to tell you to calm down.
These types of indications are totally counterproductive : If the person could calm down just by wanting to, they would do so immediately and would not be going through the crisis. In this way, encouraging a person with anxiety to try to block that feeling leads them to become even more frustrated at not being able to immediately eliminate that type of mental content.
It can also add to the burden or tension you may feel from feeling recriminated for not being able to get out of the situation. The reaction is probably not positive, since it increases nervousness and the feeling of overwhelm and suffocation.
The person who is suffering from an anxiety attack usually You will feel safer if you feel that there is someone nearby who can help you and assist you at that moment.
However, it is necessary that you have some space, in the sense that it is not advisable for a large number of people to gather around you as it makes it easier to get even more nervous (something that can happen, for example, if we get on the street).
3. Help him focus on a fixed stimulus different from his sensations of suffocation or suffering
Whoever suffers an anxiety crisis is experiencing a series of very intense symptoms on which they generally focus their attention.
One way to help them would be to try to get them to focus on some different type of stimulus. In this sense, it may be helpful to try to keep eye contact with you, and help them focus their attention in aspects such as your own breathing in order to imitate it.
You can also try to distract them in other ways, such as talking to them to focus on what we are telling them instead of the symptoms, although this may not work.
4. Try to help him take deeper breaths
One of the strategies that can be useful to help a person in the middle of an anxiety crisis is to help her control her breathing, given that in these crises one of the main symptoms is the existence of hyperventilation
In this sense, it can be useful to try to get the other person to pay attention to you and try to take a deep breath, both inhaling and exhaling. If you have one, it can also help to use a paper bag so you can focus on filling and emptying it.
5. Don’t panic
Experiencing an anxiety crisis is not exactly pleasant and generates a great deal of suffering, to the point that the person may feel like they are dying or losing their minds. In this circumstance, having someone next to you who reacts with panic and nervousness and without knowing what to do about what is happening can increase one’s own anxiety.
That is why it is necessary try to stay calm and act decisively so that the other’s way of acting is a calming stimulus for the person having the attack.
6. Speak clearly and with a calm voice
Although the person in the middle of an anxiety crisis may react with some hostility, the truth is that the fact that they are spoken to in a firm, calm voice and in a clear manner can help lower activation level especially if you are processing and understand what we are telling you.
7. Remind him that anxiety eventually passes
This point is only applicable if the person has already had other anxiety attacks before. It’s about trying to remind them that even though the sensations are very intense and aversive, These crises are not dangerous for your life and that little by little your symptoms will disappear
Of course, you always have to assess whether it is truly an anxiety crisis, since we could be facing another type of problem.
How to help people with anxiety (whether or not they suffer from a disorder)
Supporting someone who is feeling a certain level of anxiety requires an appropriate approach to their situation. First of all, you have to assess if there is a reason for this emotional reaction, in order to be able to act little by little to reduce your level of tension. In this sense we can make some recommendations.
Very often sensations and emotions considered negative, such as sadness or anxiety, tend to be hidden or poorly expressed. A good way to reduce the level of tension of those who are anxious is allow this emotion to be expressed in some way In this sense, it may be useful to talk to him or her about her situation.
2. Expressive and energy-releasing activities
Probably when we have been anxious, one of the ways to reduce this discomfort has been to do something that allows us to let off steam. This can also help others do the same.
Among the different activities to do, those that allow us to truly discharge our instincts stand out, such as performing exercises, practicing boxing, singing, shouting or dancing. It can also be useful to write or paint, if possible. avoiding excessive rationalization but letting things emerge and flow naturally
3. Help him assess his concerns
There are many aspects of our lives that can cause us anxiety. However, sometimes focusing on these aspects can become extremely maladaptive and prevent us from functioning normatively. It may be useful to contribute to make you appreciate your concerns, as well as the way you relate to them and how they affect you
It is important not to do this through criticism or by diminishing the importance of your thoughts (since at the end of the day if they generate anxiety it is because they matter to you), but rather in a reflective manner and proposing whether worrying or avoiding situations is really an advantage or a disadvantage in your daily life.
4. Propose alternative interpretations
Another aspect that can be useful and that is in fact used in therapy is to propose finding alternative interpretations to our thoughts and concerns, as well as possible disturbing thoughts that we find dysfunctional or especially limiting.
5. Use relaxation techniques
One of the most common techniques when it comes to anxiety are relaxation techniques, among which breathing and muscle relaxation techniques stand out.
These types of techniques allow us to focus our attention on certain sensations, or get used to going from states of tension to states of relaxation in such a way that the possibility of suffering a crisis is reduced and prevented while at the same time it is possible to reduce nervous activity and calm the body and mind.
In this sense, it is possible to indicate the possibility of carrying out some variant of this type of techniques, even in a group.
6. Mindfulness: Full attention
Although mindfulness seems like the umpteenth fad when it comes to meditation practices of Eastern origin, the truth is that this technique has been shown to have very beneficial effects in the treatment of anxiety.
Often misnamed relaxation technique, What is intended with this type of methodology is to focus on the here and now , as well as observing our thoughts and sensations and allowing them to flow without judging them. It is very useful in helping a person with anxiety, and it does not take much time to learn the basics.
7. Recommend professional help
In the event that we are facing an anxiety disorder, these recommendations may fall somewhat short and it is usually advisable to seek professional help. In this sense it may be a good idea try to help find a psychologist or recommend doing so given that many people may not dare to take the step.
Throughout the psychotherapy processes, psycho-emotional skills are worked on and the generation of habits necessary to better regulate anxiety processes. For example, the patient is trained in relaxation techniques, helped to get used to certain stressful situations, helped to adopt a constructive mentality that does not fuel fear, etc. In this way, in a matter of a few months, important changes for the better are achieved.
