40 Questions That Indicate If You Suffer Psychological Abuse As A Couple
Unfortunately, relationships are not always healthy, and abuse is a phenomenon that occurs in some toxic relationships. In the article “Profile of the psychological abuser: 21 common traits” we already delve into the psychological profile of an individual who abuses. But… How can we know that we are victims of psychological abuse?
Questions to know if you suffer psychological abuse from a partner
Below you can find a list of questions that can help you know if you are a victim of this type of psychological abuse In addition, they will allow you to reflect on the foundations of your relationship and perhaps help you realize that something is not working correctly.
1. Does he tell you how you have to dress? If you go in a way that he doesn’t like, does he get angry with you for it and you decide to change your clothes? Are there clothes that you no longer wear because you know that someone doesn’t like you to wear that way and you’re going to have problems because of it?
Abusive people are controlling and authoritarian. Their insecurity makes them jealous in a toxic way.
2. When you do something for your partner, does he thank you for it or does he make you feel like it’s your obligation?
Manipulation frequently appears in psychological abuse, as you can see in the article “6 manipulation strategies used by abusers.”
3. Are important decisions made without taking your opinion into account?
Manipulators are authoritarian people who think they are always right in everything.
4. Do you control the money you spend? Do you have to ask your partner for the money? Do you ask permission when buying something, whether for yourself or for the house?
In addition to controlling clothing, you also keep track of expenses and finances.
5. Do you have to inform him of your schedules?
The person who is manipulative directs his or her partner’s life. She doesn’t let him be free.
6. Do you downplay your personal or professional achievements?
He is not able to tell you how much you are worth, because He is interested in you feeling insecure and with low self-esteem
7. Do you organize your free time? Do you feel that in your free time you have to consult him on how to invest your time?
Control the way you dress, expenses and also your time.
15. Have you stopped telling your loved ones about your relationship problems because you know that if they found out they would get angry?
Ultimately, the relationship becomes toxic. Trust is completely lost.
16. Does your partner monitor what you have been doing and not believe your answers?
The lack of trust also turns into distrust.
17. Do you control your cell phone and your social networks?
Social networks are part of our daily lives. That is why the abuser seeks to control them at all costs.
18. Do you feel uncomfortable if someone of the opposite sex looks at you in case your partner notices and it could be the reason for another argument?
sick jealousy They are part of the daily life of a toxic relationship
19. Does your partner criticize or embarrass you in front of other people?
He doesn’t respect you, and he doesn’t care about disrespecting you in front of others.
20. Does your partner seem jealous, with behaviors such as accusing you of having affairs?
Distrust is very great in this type of relationship, and unfounded accusations of infidelity can also be great.
21. Do you often use emotional blackmail to achieve your goals?
Emotional blackmail is a weapon widely used by abusers. You can check it out in the article “Emotional blackmail: a powerful form of manipulation in a couple.”
22. Does he treat you as if he were your parent instead of your partner?
Your relationship is not a love relationship based on respect.
23. Do you feel forced or pushed to have sex with your partner?
It is such the dominion it exercises over you that you feel obligated to please him.
24. Do you feel like you can’t be yourself when you are with your partner?
You fear their reaction and that’s why your behavior changes.
25. Are you afraid to express a different opinion than your partner?
Manipulative people are authoritarian and, therefore, their opinion is the only one that counts.
26. Do you feel that even without him/her being there, when you want to be yourself you think that maybe it bothers him/her and you stop doing the things you wanted to do?
His influence on you is so great that even without being present, you fear him.
27. Does it remind you a thousand times of the mistakes you have made?
He behaves like this to make you feel inferior and your self-esteem suffers.
28. Do you feel guilty when you get sick?
Even when you are sick, you can’t be yourself.
29. Have you stopped seeing your family or friends because of your partner’s behavior?
He has tried to separate you from your family, and he has succeeded.
30. Do you watch what you do for fear that your partner will get angry or feel bad?
The fear of your partner is such that you behave just as he wants.
31. Has the way he addresses you changed, becoming imperative?
At first, the abuser may seem like a good person, but over time, his or her true personality comes out. To know more about the subtle aspects of personality you can learn more in some of the works in this selection of books: “The 31 best Psychology books that you cannot miss.”
32. Do you feel afraid?
If you feel afraid of your partner, then you must react. Seek help from people close to you and from professionals.
33. When there has been an argument, on most occasions do you give in, even if you are right because they could spend days without speaking to you and ignoring you?
Completely master your behavior and you are no longer capable of being assertive.
34. Do you blame your friends for causing your arguments and distance yourself from them?
In an attempt to distance yourself from your friends, blame them for your arguments.
35. Do you feel anxious or nervous when you are around your partner?
Fear and anxiety manifest when you have to be close to your partner.
36. Do you go to places and do activities you don’t want to so he doesn’t get angry?
You stop being yourself because you fear it.
37. Are you afraid to say some things to him because you know that his reaction may be disproportionate?
Not only do you go to places you don’t want to, but you also don’t say what you think for fear of their reaction.
38. Do you feel like you need their approval in everything you do, or even think?
You are not a free person, because you depend on him in every way. You can’t even think freely.
39. If you have a problem outside the realm of the couple, does it make you feel responsible for it?
It makes you feel guilty even in situations that have nothing to do with your relationship.
40. Do you notice that when the same act is done by another person, they value it more positively than if you are the one who does it?
He treats you differently than others, and can be very different with other people.
