Before reading the article, let’s think about those people who can get us out of our temper even though sometimes we love them very much.
Who doesn’t have a friend, boss, partner, partner, etc. Who doesn’t know someone who calls you or you call them and after blurting out all their problems on the run they say, well, we’ve talked and you haven’t been able to say a word? Who doesn’t? Do you know someone who only talks about himself, about his achievements and that just by talking about him his mouth fills and he has no room for anything else? Who doesn’t know or has known someone who until he gets you to do What he wants doesn’t stop? Who doesn’t know someone who has so many skills to turn the tables that you are stunned when he leaves and in the end you are left as the culprit?
The predominant emotions we feel in front of these people are usually helplessness, anger and confusion. Our face at that moment is a poem, because the worst of all is that they have not even been aware of how they have behaved and the “ballast” they have left on the other. It will seem incredible to us that they are not aware of it, because BELIEVE IT , it is like that, but that does not mean we have to continue allowing it.
The first thing is to identify these people, normally although we don’t like to say it, they are usually the most loved and/or closest to us in the family, work or social environment. What should we pay attention to? In how we feel in front of these people, emotion and intuition are usually not wrong. At the same time, ask ourselves whether it is necessary to maintain that relationship or not, valuing what it brings us. In the event that it is not necessary, we will end it WITHOUT feeling guilty, since we have to take into account that these people do not care about us enough to have to put up with this type of attitude. If, on the other hand, we have no choice because they are family, friends or co-workers, we will take a deep breath every time we have to talk to these people, expelling the air so intensely to get rid of all the tension that this moment is producing in us.
Faced with his speech, which is usually very directive, imposing, critical or complaining, annoying or hurtful, we can respond in two ways: The first with a big smile and sense of humor, equating it to raindrops when they slide down the raincoat (saying it delicately). not to put it another way) or if we are incapable because nothing funny comes out at that moment, we will respond with a firm tone and sure that that comment is bothering us, we do not agree, it makes us feel bad, etc. In this way we also try to earn the respect of this person and set the limits so that they reconsider having this behavior with us again.
It is important to understand that their personality is like this, it does not mean that we have to accept it without further ado, but it does mean seeing that we cannot change them, that they are the way they are because of their different learnings in life. We can understand it and even be able to have a certain compassion but that does not force us to have to put up with it.
