Goodbyes are almost never easy; even if they are short. Returning to school is usually no exception, especially if you have children at home.
There are many changes that the little ones must face and that can generate some uncertainty. Separation anxiety is a very common reaction in these cases and it is important to understand it in order to be able to support them in the best way.
Here we will explain what separation anxiety in children is, what its causes are and how it manifests.. Plus, we’ll give you some practical tools to help you manage this emotion and make going back to school a calmer experience for both you and your little one.
What is separation anxiety?
Separation anxiety is a natural and common emotional response, especially in childhood. It manifests as intense and disproportionate distress when a person separates or anticipates separation from loved ones, such as parents, family members or primary caregivers.
Contrary to what some might think, separation anxiety is not a sign of immaturity.. On the contrary, it reflects a strong emotional bond and an innate desire for protection. But it must be taken into account that, if this anxiety greatly affects daily life, interpersonal relationships or school performance, it could be a sign of a more severe separation anxiety disorder.
There are several factors that may contribute to the development of separation anxiety, and may include traumatic experiences, changes in the family environment, individual temperament, and genetic factors. Understanding the underlying causes is essential for designing effective therapeutic interventions.
Let’s talk about separation anguish when going back to school
With the arrival of autumn, the time to return to the school routine is also approaching. For many children, this means meeting friends, discovering new learning, and explore a world beyond home. However, for others, going back to school can be a source of anxiety, especially when it involves separation from their parents or primary caregivers.
Separation anxiety is a completely normal and understandable emotion at certain stages of development and can intensify during these times of transition.
For now, let’s know its possible causes and most common symptoms:
Origin
Separation anxiety originates in the emotional connection that forms between the child and his or her attachment figures.. This bond, although it is essential for the adequate emotional and social development of the infant, can give rise to considerable distress when there is a risk of separation.
In the case of going back to school, this threat can manifest itself in different ways: fear of the unknown, uncertainty about what will happen at school, the feeling of abandonment or concern for the safety of their parents.
Several elements can influence the intensity of separation anxiety when returning to school. The child’s temperament, age, previous separation experiences, parenting style, and the presence of other anxiety disorders may play an important role. Additionally, recent stressful events, such as a move or an illness, can greatly increase this emotion.
Signs of separation anxiety when back to school
Separation anxiety can manifest itself in several ways in children. Some may present physical symptoms such as headaches, nausea or stomach pains, while others may experience difficulty sleeping, changes in appetite or regressions in sphincter control. On an emotional level, it is common to observe excessive crying, irritability, tantrums and irrational fears.
Additionally, children with separation anxiety may show active resistance to going to school, which may lead them to cling to their parents or caregivers and refuse to let go.
They may also exhibit avoidance behaviors, such as hiding or pretending to be sick so as not to have to face separation. It is important to remember that these behaviors are a way of communicating the emotional discomfort they are experiencing and should not be interpreted as manipulation.
Understanding the causes and manifestations of separation anxiety when returning to school is the first step in providing the necessary support to children and their families.
Keys to managing anxiety when returning to school
Returning to school can be a time of adjustment for many children, especially those experiencing separation anxiety. Understanding strategies to manage this emotion can be very beneficial for parents and caregivers.
1. Have open and honest communication
It is essential to establish an open and sincere dialogue with the child. Listening to your concerns and fears without judging them can make you feel safer and more understood.. Simply explaining what will happen at school, who will be there to look after you, and when you will meet again can help reduce uncertainty.
2. Establish stable and predictable routines
Creating schedules and routines both at home and at school provides a sense of security and control. Stability in daily activities helps the child anticipate what will happen and reduces anxiety.
3. Try separation step by step
Do short separations and strive for longer separations. Try leaving your child with a trusted friend or family member while you run a quick errand and see how the situation develops. This will help your little one gradually adjust to the experience of being separated.
4. Promote autonomy
Allowing your child to make small decisions and take responsibility can strengthen their self-esteem.. Invite him to organize his school supplies, to decide, with your help, what his snack will be, etc. The feeling of control over your environment gives you security and confidence.
5. Give them peace of mind
When saying goodbye, it is important that the son or daughter feels that their parents are calm, that they have no reason to worry. Make it clear that in a few hours you will see each other again and don’t make the farewell too long.
6. Take care of yourself
Parents and caregivers also need time to relax and take care of their emotional well-being. Stress and anxiety can be passed on to children, so it is important to seek support and practice relaxation techniques.