Why can we feel sad before our birthday? What can we do if we experience sadness on this day? Discover the most common causes and how to deal with it.
He ‘Birthday Blues’ It refers to the sadness that we can experience during our birthday. In fact, this feeling can be accompanied by a series of thoughts of failure, apathy, lack of energy and regrets about our past. These feelings can arise in the days leading up to our birthday, as well as on the day itself, and also for some time afterwards. But why can we feel this way?
Signs of ‘Birthday Blues’
There are different signs that could indicate that you are experiencing this ‘sadness’ on your birthday. Mainly, people may face the following due to the ‘Birthday Blues’:
- Change in your mood: As your birthday arrives, you start to feel down and feel sad.
- Think about the past: You think about those goals that you have not achieved
- Lack of motivation: Because your birthday is approaching, you start to experience less energy and even less motivation to do what you love.
- Difficult to focus: People who experience Birthday Blues tend to begin to have difficulty focusing on certain tasks due to the sadness they feel.
- Physical pain or discomfort: When a person suffers from this sadness due to this time of year, they may end up experiencing physical ailments or pain because it somatizes their negative emotions.
- Avoid celebration or congratulations: Many people, faced with this birthday sadness, may end up avoiding congratulations or talking about how to celebrate that day.
These are some of the signs that could indicate that a person is suffering from ‘Birthday Blues ‘.
Why does the ‘Birthday Blues‘?
When a person experiences this sadness for their birthday, these feelings can be linked to different problems in our mental health or in our way of facing life. Some of the reasons why a person may suffer from ‘Birthday Blues ‘ are the following:
- Depression and/or anxiety: People who suffer from an anxiety disorder or depression may see their birthday as a date to avoid due to the thoughts of regret that may arise from this day of the year.
- Fear of aging: In some cases, people may feel Birthday Blues due to fear of aging or death itself. This may be due to both societal prejudices and life experiences.
- Lack of meaning and purpose: Not having goals in life or not building or pursuing our purpose can make us feel bad on our birthday because we begin to reflect on the passage of time.
- Relationship problems: Our birthday is a time that helps us think about our situation also with our friends, family or partner. So, if this is negative, it can create discomfort in us.
- Low self-esteem: Not feeling good about ourselves can also end up making us not want to celebrate our birthday. Therefore, it can end up causing a feeling of sadness on our birthday.
These are some of the main reasons that can make people feel sad because their birthday is approaching. Given this, it is important to focus on working to solve these feelings.
How to face the ‘Brithday Blues’?
Faced with these feelings of sadness, we recommend that you keep the following tips in mind:
- Recognize your emotions: Trying to ‘cover’ the negative emotions you feel because of your birthday will not help you at all. So, instead of trying to deny them, acknowledge them and above all give them the space they deserve. Recognizing these feelings will allow you to understand why they arise and what you can do to deal with them.
- Change your internal dialogue: In many cases, the negative feelings of the ‘Brithday Blues‘ tend to be linked to the idea that we haven’t gotten what we wanted or haven’t done enough. Instead of focusing on these ideas and criticizing ourselves, try to be more rational with these thoughts and understand why you decided this and why you made that decision.
- Talk to a trusted person: Sharing these feelings with a loved one will help you better deal with the sadness related to your birthday. In fact, it is very likely that others feel something similar or may even give you reasons to stop thinking that way.
- Celebrate your birthday however you want: On many occasions we tend to consider that our birthday should be celebrated in a big way because most people want that. Instead of focusing on the most ‘common’ things, try to focus on what you really want and how you want to celebrate it.
- Reflect on your life: Birthday can be a good date to try to understand where we want to go and above all what we want for our lives. So, instead of focusing on the negative, try to understand where you want to go and how you can start doing it.
- Talk to a therapist: If you feel that this sadness is limiting you, it may be a good idea to go to a professional psychologist. This specialist will help you understand where this feeling comes from and how to work on it.
Although birthdays are often associated with happy feelings and positive experiences, this may not be the case for everyone. So, on this day, it is important to focus on celebrating who you are just the way you like and feel like it.