Conscious Touch: The Art Of Knowing How To Touch And Touch Ourselves
The touch. Just one of our five physical senses that link us to the outside world, the material world and the world of the tangible Nothing new is that our emotional and sexual education has always been limited to gender roles, religious expectations and limited sexuality from reproduction, contraceptive methods and sexually transmitted diseases, which of course are part of but are not all that is encompassed. human sexuality.
The exercise of touch, from our birth, is our first connection with the physical world. However, it is an act that we assume is fact and obvious, which is always well received and well provided. As much as talking about intercourse, orgasms, moans, ejaculations, fluids, etc., touch from sexuality and sexual relationships has always aroused our curiosity due to the socio-cultural and religious taboo that surrounds them, starting from the recognition of our own body to through erotic self-touch, Our first resource in the process of erotic self-knowledge was generally with the “help” of porn, magazines, etc
And for most of us, not even at home, much less in schools, were we taught to relate to our own body, with our needs, to establish our limits or to respect those of others, much less were we taught about consent, or pleasure. , nor to love freely without the preconceptions instilled by Disney, Hollywood, most religions as the idea of romantic love is promoted, nor to recognize our emotional, erotic and sexual needs, much less to communicate them or that self-exploration is not only normal but is healthy and necessary, so the fact of conceiving conscious touch and even less with erotic intention even in ourselves since it was always inadequate, unthinkable, sickly, dirty, sinful and/or unpleasant.
So what is conscious touch? A conscious touch, unlike ordinary or unconscious touch, is that touch that is given and received with absolute presence, without precipitation, with a synchronicity between the body and the mind There are no thoughts, images, fantasies or distracting dialogues that interfere, it is an act of dynamic and almost always shared meditation, without necessarily implying a sexual intention, but also as an act of connection with the other.
Almost always our intention is pleasure, skin-to-skin contact, establishing a bond with the other. One of the main signs of fractures in relationships is the lack of touch between each other, a lack of hugs, a lack of caresses, even passionate kisses… Those deep kisses at the beginning of the relationship.
What does touch have to do with a “therapeutic” process or sexual relearning?
I avoid saying therapeutic process because it is often related to following instructions or taking medications. In Sexological Bodywork or Sexological Bodywork we teach strategies based on the grounded practice of co-creation that is to say that the client is a participant in asking for the type of touch, depth, areas of his body that he wishes to deepen, improve, heal, recognize, explore that from the experience of receiving allows him to redefine the learning of consent and touch, both such as the breathing that results from your convenience or ease, the movements that you allow yourself to make to promote your process.
That is, he actively participates in what he wants, what he desires in each session under the conditions established under the code of ethics. In this way, he adheres efficiently, enjoys it, relearns and modifies practices, including the exercise of giving and knowing how to receive touch. Conscious touch as part of the experience of pleasure can be diverse according to the focus, need and intention, as well as personal preferences, although the central axis in Somatic Sexuality is always THE INTENTION.
Conscious touch is one of the tools part of individual processes such as, for example, premature or involuntary ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, sensitive anmesia, anorgasmia, healing process due to emotional, psychological and physical trauma (cesarean sections, episiotomies, vasectomies, prostate surgery , breast implants, etc., etc. in couples as in the processes of sexual reconnection, erotic communication, creative capacity and trust, even in group experiences that can be challenging but where learning is 360° thanks to the feedback and perceived experiences of others. .
However, It is always made clear to the client that all practices are governed by a code of professional ethics, among which the guarantees of consent are explained and provided, mutual agreements are established and that every touch that is provided is unidirectional. That is, it depends on the client’s personal learning, but he or she does not return. In all sessions that require genital touch, gloves are used.
