Taking a look at what we know about our history, It seems that human beings have always wanted to appear more than what we are Both through the exaggeration of the characteristics that define us and through the invention of traits that, deep down, do not characterize us. This occurs on a collective level, as seen for example in large monuments designed to impress, but also, and this is most painful of all, on an individual level.
And I say that it is painful because, beyond how badly certain people who live for and to pretend what they are not may fall, vanity is, in reality, something that prevents us from getting to know people A barrier that keeps us separated, where it exists to a greater or lesser extent.
And this becomes a problem when we ask ourselves the key question…
Who is safe from vanity?
When we have to make quick decisions about who to direct our attention to, we often we end up giving up on the possibility of judging through appearances and clichés and favor people who wrap their identity in them. We like authentic people more, but we opt for those who live off the image.
Yes, authenticity is not characterized by having been very abundant years ago, but there are those who say that today authentic people are in critical danger of extinction. The motives? The culture of spectacle, the importance of image over content, the dictatorship of rapid consumption. They are principles that seem to belong to the realm of advertising, marketing and markets, but that increasingly invade the realm of the human, the personal.
Being honest pays dearly
Not only is vain behavior positively reinforced. Honesty is also punished It is logical, if you take into account that many studies show that a large part of professional success also depends on our personal image. It happens in practically any field of work, but it is somewhat extreme in the case of professions in which aesthetics is decisive.
On certain social networks such as Instagram you can see how there is a bubble of speculation based on aesthetics. We saw it in the case of model Stina Sanders and the scandal that arose when she began uploading selfies without makeup, or in the case of Essena O’Neill.
How to recognize authentic people?
Given what we have seen, it is not surprising that authentic people can be difficult to find: they are buried under a barrage of social dynamics that invite us to stop acting as they do.
However, with a little dedication and practice It is possible to recognize someone whose way of being and acting is consistent with your way of thinking
Knowing these basic characteristics can help to vindicate this way of understanding life and, furthermore, to self-evaluate to know if one is being successful when it comes to linking personal development to the achievement of an authentic personality.
Which people are really authentic? Its basic characteristics are the following.
1. They don’t constantly think about their image
This is possibly its most defining trait. Of course, everything is relative, so authentic people can spontaneously think about how they are seen by others, but this does not become an obsessive loop
This means, for example, that They rarely ask for a second opinion on their appearance and who do not worry about appearing indifferent to their image, something that ironically could happen if they ascribed themselves in a very rigid or dogmatic way to an aesthetic current that, out of pure conventionality, we associate with carefreeness and the alternative (hipters, punks, etc.) .
2. They do not force their non-verbal language
This is a practical consequence that follows from the previous characteristic. People who try to adopt very imposed movements and tone of voice are relatively easy to recognize, because it takes a lot of work to learn a series of movement patterns that do not correspond to those we have been learning and using since our childhood.
In this way, their non-verbal language is natural and You won’t see them trying to pretend what they are not
3. They are not afraid to show their opinions
authentic people They speak as freethinkers, and will clearly express their ideas even if they may seem very radical or strange The motives? They know that in most spaces the free expression of their ideas will not give them serious problems, and therefore they do not give up taking advantage of the possibilities that a good conversation with someone offers.
This makes them good conversationalists, although sometimes their reflections can cause controversy among those accustomed to a politically correct line of argument.
4. They try to understand others
Leaving behind vanity and misunderstood pride also implies, to a greater or lesser extent, give up clichés and stereotypes to try to “read someone’s mind” which is not known very well.
Where other people throw in the towel by believing that they already know what the other person is like, authentic people take on the challenge of matching their way of understanding reality with those of their interlocutors.
5. They do not prejudge
authentic people They are not very fond of making decisions based on how their possible options are presented to them For this reason, they like to re-examine what happens to them, taking into account which things are objective and which are simply biases and prejudices arbitrarily manufactured by others.
This does not mean that to be authentic you cannot be impulsive, but rather that you do not fall into easy judgments and question prevailing opinions. What they call “rebellious spirit.”