How many times in your daily life do you think, very much to yourself, without sharing it with anyone: is this life?
In the daily routine, you go up, go down, come in, go out, you are in the daily grind of everyday life. And everything is going well, at least as it should be. And you continue living day after day. But there may also be times when you feel on edge. Tiny moments in which – almost without (wanting to) realizing it – you don’t find meaning. You feel like you can’t take it anymore. You want to escape reality.
It’s the day to day that drags you a, and that you don’t think can change. It is a reality that requires you to take care of what happens: work, your partner, your family, and also your children – if you have them…
It is the same reality that leads you – almost without realizing it – to continue. Of course! We have to keep going! Because you can.
And only in very precise moments, those moments when you can’t take it anymore and feeling takes over, then you feel… you realize that you feel, and yes you do feel! Even if it’s only inwards, because you don’t share it with anyone, it is something so intimate, so yours! And in that millisecond in which you allow yourself and can feel, then you let yourself go and the feeling absorbs you and you realize that something is not right (only for you, itself). And very secretly – also only for you – you know that you are not living what you want, you are not living the life you want.
You realize that what is happening is happening, and for you it is something too, but it is not what you want. And for a millisecond you feel that what you are noticing is not what you really want. What you are experiencing is not ‘living’. What you are doing is just ‘surviving’.
And you continue in life, surviving You survive what happens to you. You survive life itself. And you continue forward, because a part of you wants and as a person you tell yourself that you deserve it, because you are worth it, because you can. Although sometimes it is difficult, although sometimes you like it less, but you always move forward, encouraging yourself, overcoming yourself, believing that it is worth it. And you smile. And you keep looking forward. And what others see is that you are fine.
You are not alone
We all survive a reality that we make our own. “Reality” is what you feel while you live… Even though it is understood that reality is one, your life is one, unique and you only have to “comply” with it, with your life. We confuse ourselves with what is imposed on us as ‘normal’, what is socially accepted and valued. If this did not exist: What would you feel?
Your reality is a moment by moment in which you can be, in which you can be, just as you feel it: with your ups and downs, with the feeling of not wanting to continue or with the feeling that you can do everything. You are all that.
Living in society imposes certain “norms” on us. But let us not forget that it is thanks to our differentiation that this society is possible. It’s not about forgetting or postponing who you are. It is about accepting that you are a unique and unrepeatable being. That is precisely where our greatness lies.
The society in which we live encourages us to maintain “composure”, to show what is expected of us: it is a ‘comply’ with what is “normal”; It demands us to deal with what is outside, to respond, to solve, to “be able to handle everything.” It forces us to “do” to be what we are expected to be. It pushes us not to give in to what we feel, to what is really happening inside…
Concluding…
It’s not about having it all, but to understand and feel what it is that we really want. It’s not about having or not having, but about what I really want because it fits who I am.
It is listening to ourselves that can really free us and thus make us feel happier.
