Fear Of Loneliness Or Autophobia: 5 Keys To Overcome It
Do you know autophobia or the phobia of loneliness? How is it different from the feeling of loneliness? Discover how to overcome the fear of loneliness with the help of psychology.
The autophobia It is defined as the fear of loneliness or of being with oneself, in such a way that being alone ends up producing anxiety and a fear so intense that it is considered a specific phobia, such as, for example, the phobia of cockroaches. There is a difference between not wanting to be alone and avoiding being alone or feeling alone at all costs; and one of them is a normal fear while the other is a phobia. The fear of loneliness, also known as eremophobia or autophobia, is a condition that limits the life of the person who suffers from it.
What does the fear of loneliness or autophobia imply?
He fear of being alone or autophobia, does not mean being alone in life, but a phobia of loneliness that implies not wanting to be alone or being alone. So much so that this fear of being alone can create an emotional and effective dependence on the people around you.
Therefore, the autophobia or fear of loneliness It is a specific phobia that involves the feeling of fear of being alone at any moment in life. In this way, people who fear being alone can reconfigure their lives so as not to be with themselves.
Symptoms of fear of loneliness or autophobia
There are a series of signs that can indicate that a person does not know how to deal with loneliness or your own company. According to psychologists, the phobia of being alone can be detected through the following symptoms.
Dizziness, fainting, or nausea when alone
Experiencing anxiety when left alone
Feeling isolated or thinking that you may be alone in life
Do everything possible to not be left alone
Panic attacks when feeling lonely
Emotional dependence in relationships
Beliefs that being alone will cause something catastrophic to happen
How is the feeling of loneliness different from autophobia?
Although it is not a diagnosis yet registered by the DSM-V (diagnostic manual for psychiatrists and psychologists), the autophobia or fear of loneliness is defined by:
Avoidance of loneliness at all costs: The person needs the company of anyone. Thus, there is a tendency to do any activity with someone, from going to the movies to shopping, to the gym or even walking down the street. Unlike fear of loneliness or fear of being alone As usual, people have a certain tendency to prefer company, but we do not avoid day-to-day situations because we cannot go with someone.
Anyone is better than alone: The goal is not to be alone, no matter who you are with. People with autophobia or fear of loneliness and sadness What being alone can mean, they are capable of meeting anyone, even if they don’t benefit from anything or even dislike them, as long as they aren’t alone, anything goes. On the other hand, when someone does not have a phobia of oneself, the saying that it is better to be alone than in bad company can apply.
Emotional dependence: They are people who end up emotionally dependent on anyone, be it a partner, friends or co-workers. Therefore, they tend to generate close ties with anyone who crosses their path to avoid harm at all costs. moments of solitude When you do not have autophobia, there can also be emotional dependence but not necessarily.
Great emotional emptiness and irrational fear of loneliness: When they can’t meet someone they feel a great emotional emptiness, fear, loneliness and sadness excessive. They feel unprotected and afraid, like naked, and they don’t know what to do with that time. Instead of enjoying their autonomy and time for themselves, that feeling generates fear and anxiety. If autophobia does not exist, being alone can be sad, but it does not go to the extreme of feeling aversion.
Many of the people who experience autophobia or the phobia of loneliness have been people who have suffered abandonment (whether physical or emotional) from their main caregivers during early childhood and may later have been linked to more abandonment or a poor feeling of belonging (for example in cases of bullying). Therefore, they develop an aversion or fear of that sensation and at the slightest symptom, the trauma experienced in childhood (although it is not something conscious).
How to overcome autophobia or fear of loneliness?
In order to face this fear of being alone in life or the fear of being alone, the key is to work on the phobia of loneliness and the origin it may have. According to psychologists, you can focus on the following.
Learn to be with yourself: You are so focused on others and not be alone You probably haven’t stopped to think about your personal concerns, interests or hobbies. Think about things you would like to learn, what skills to develop, how to spend your free time enjoying yourself and what you want to do.
Prioritize your emotions: Not everything has such not be alone Think about what you feel, what the people around you transmit to you and the price you are paying to not be alone. Listen to your emotions and act accordingly.
Work on your traumas: This fear to loneliness Irrational comes from an experience or emotion that you cannot control. In these cases, it is vital to analyze where it comes from and how to solve the root problem. If you can’t use your own tools, go to a psychologist or psychotherapist to help you work on that feeling of childhood abandonment. Professional help can be key to overcoming this problem.
Don’t tolerate bad relationships: This fear of being alone It can involve tolerating toxic relationships from both yourself and others. In this way, in many cases this phobia of being alone may have been caused by a bad experience in the past with manipulative or blackmailing people. For this reason, it is crucial to try to avoid this type of attitude from others at all costs.
Get out of your comfort zone: One of the keys to know how to overcome loneliness and autophobia It is precisely ending the comfort that this entails. Therefore, the fear of loneliness is combated not by trying to meet more people to make a plan, but by making this plan for yourself.
‘No man is an island, everything in himself, each man is a piece of the continent.’
Joh Donne, poet
He fear of loneliness or autophobia It implies having a problem inside you that you must face and solve. Knowing yourself and what your insides are like will be the first step to overcoming it and taking control of your life again.
