How Can We Go Through Grief?

Unfortunately, losing a loved one is something that we will experience sooner or later. Suffering this loss can be one of the most painful experiences in life. Thus, it is normal for us to feel lost and overwhelmed by pain. This is a normal process that we must go through.

Unfortunately, there is no specific guide of steps to follow. Nor is there a magic formula to make the process easy.

Do we all manage grief in the same way?

The short answer is no. The long answer is: it depends. It depends on how each and every one of us is. Each person is a certain way, they have a specific story that conditions the way you manage your circumstances. And we do it the best we know how.

Going through a loss without having first experienced it is not the same as experiencing it when we have already had that experience. It is also not the same when we are aware that death is probable due to illness, because in some way we can expect it. However, when the death is sudden, due to a work accident, for example, we will not experience it in the same way.

It also depends on How has our relationship been with the being we have lost?. Each relationship is unique, and each person occupies a specific role in our lives. The relationship we have with our parents, for example, is not the same as the one we have with our partner. Thus, depending on the type of relationship, the grieving process may be different.

What we should know about grief

Surely many people will talk to you about their experiences of grief and tell you, with their best intentions, how you should feel and what you should do. Consequently, our experience is likely to be so different that we may feel guilty for not crying or think that we are too weak for suffering so much.

Nothing is further from reality. We have already seen that the grieving process is something unique that depends on many things. That is why all the emotions we experience are valid. And what we experience will be different from other people’s experience. So, What matters is how we feel and what we decide to do.

How to make difficult grief a more bearable experience?

First of all, remember that there is no magic formula for grieving. Here are some suggestions to make it a little easier:

1. Let off steam

Do not keep your emotions to yourself because, even if it is painful, It is also healthy to share how you feel with those closest to you. If you keep it to yourself, the process is likely to be more difficult and take longer. However, when you express it and share it, you will notice that the experience is more bearable.

2. Don’t judge how you feel

As we have seen, each person has a different experience of grief and all the emotions we feel are valid. Therefore, it is important that you stop judging yourself and allow yourself to feel your emotions. This will allow you to recover sooner.

3. Don’t isolate yourself

You probably don’t feel like going out and staying at home, and that’s normal. It’s okay to give us some time. However, It is necessary that we go out and little by little we interact with those who matter to us. This way, we will feel supported and we will also be distracted.

4. Do pleasant activities

When we go through complicated grief and feel a lot of pain, it is good for us to take a break and do activities that we find enjoyable. Thanks to this, you will notice that it will help you recover your life more easily.

5. Don’t stop your life

Even if it is difficult for you, continuing with your life will make it easier for you to return to a more normal situation. At first, it is normal that we do not have the strength to continue. However, by staying like this, the more difficult it will be for us to grieve. On the other hand, if you start small and continue with your life, you will probably notice that you can move on and you will learn to live with that loss.

6. Go to a professional

Facing grief in a healthy way often involves going to a psychologist to help you in an objective and personalized way.

When the grieving process we are experiencing makes us suffer too much and lasts a long time, you will most likely need professional help and support. For this reason in PsychoAlmería both in person and online, we have the necessary experience to help you.