In most cases, vacations are an element that has a positive impact on the emotional well-being and mental health of people, especially those who remain active at work or academically throughout the year.
However, the vacation period is not free of certain risks, potential problems that may arise if the right circumstances occur and that are supported by that change in routines and places that being on vacation attracts into our daily lives It is advisable to know them in advance to detect them quickly and not let them hinder our emotional relationships during those days of disconnection from work.
How do vacations influence family and couple relationships?
Starting to share spaces, activities and free time all the time sometimes encourages a crisis to arise in relationships, and these can even end in separation Something similar happens with relationships within the family, which can give rise to arguments and conflicts that end up festering and generating resentment, defensive attitudes, etc.
The element that alters coexistence and the emotional bond is not so much the fact of spending a lot of time together, but rather the abrupt transition between a stage of life in which each person has enough hours to be alone or with other people, to another in which you are with your partner or family almost constantly. It is a change to which each person must adapt more or less quickly so that problems do not arise, and this, in some cases, becomes a challenge.
But it is also true that not everything is disadvantages ; Vacations give the opportunity to strengthen ties and consolidate loving and emotional relationships. Therefore, here we will review the positive and negative effects that vacations can have on couples and families.
Potential negative effects
These are some risk elements that, since the holidays, can trigger conflicts in family and couple relationships.
1. Poor management of joint activities
Differences in tastes, priorities and expectations mean that deciding what to do together can lead to arguments and situations in which there is perceived to be a clear “winner” and “loser” ; This causes a crisis to appear both during the discussion and, if it has not been negotiated properly, in the phase in which a decision has already been made and resentment appears.
2. Different levels of search for autonomy and loneliness
Vacations as a couple or with the family are time to share, but also to disconnect, and combining those times sometimes creates conflicts. Some people want to take advantage of the vacation period to be with their loved ones, others look for exactly the opposite to try to rest as much as possible and focus on their hobbies and interests, and between these two positions there is a wide gray scale.
3. Jealousy problems
If jealousy problems already existed in a relationship, it is common for these to become more acute during the holidays since there are more leisure contexts, and greater exposure to new places where there are new people.
4. Bad mood due to an altered sleep schedule
Many people have trouble getting adequate rest during the holidays, among other things because their biorhythms are altered
When this happens, they are much more likely to feel irritable, short on patience, and easily stressed, especially if they become frustrated at not being able to fully enjoy a vacation they had idealized in their imagination.
You may be interested: “Circadian rhythms: what they are and what biological functions they are involved in”
5. Frustration over the need to take care of children
It is very common for fathers and mothers with children to feel bad for not having those hours of the day when the little one is at school.
If we add to this the social pressure to have the best vacation possible and the need to negotiate new parenting and care tasks, it is not surprising that anger and arguments can easily arise.
Related article: “Stress due to parenting tasks: causes and consequences”
Potentially positive effects
On the other hand, These are several effects through which vacations can strengthen relationships in the family and couple:
Possibility of adding more elements of enjoyment to trips if done as a family or as a couple, by creating anecdotes that can be remembered together.
Opportunity to rethink and qualitatively improve life as a couple or as a family: fixing a garden, going to meet distant relatives, helping a child decide which university degree to pursue, etc.
Opportunity to discover new facets, talents and hobbies of a loved one.
Opportunity to improve communication and support skills for others, thanks to situations that demand it.
Do you want to have professional psychological help?
If you are interested in having individualized psychological assistance or are looking for couples therapy or family therapy services, I invite you to contact me.
My name is Carolina Marin, I am a psychologist federated by the Spanish Federation of Associations of Psychotherapists (FEAP), and I have a professional career of almost 20 years offering help in the areas of emotion management, learning good communication and resolution strategies and conflicts, and resilience in periods of crisis. I offer face-to-face sessions in my office in Seville and online by video call.
