How Does Attachment Style Influence The Management Of Emotions?
When we experience emotions, what we feel is subjective and private; A person will never have a complete notion about how another person feels, they will only be able to approximate these types of experiences thanks to the use of language and the complete communication system that human beings have.
For example, art reminds us that completely delimiting affects and feelings using words to classify and describe them objectively through labels is impossible: we need to use other creative resources to capture and express them.
However, it would be a mistake to consider that human emotion is a totally individual phenomenon, which is born and dies in the person who feels it. In fact, the reason for emotions is to help us interact with the environment in the best possible way for our survival. And this includes our way of managing the relationships we have with others. That is why it is so important understand the link that exists between emotions and the type of attachment we establish with those who matter most to us already from the moment of our birth.
In the field of evolutionary psychology (the branch of psychology that studies the growth and maturation of people, from gestation in the womb to old age) attachment is considered one of the most important concepts to understand the way in which that individuals develop psychosocially.
Defined above all from the Attachment Theory of John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth, attachment is understood as a set of psychological predispositions that people adopt with respect to a referent figure, normally represented by fathers, mothers and/or caregivers during early childhood Thus, attachment gives rise to a type of emotional bond that occurs from the first weeks after the birth of the baby, and that unites the child with the closest adults who take care of their survival, care and education in the main areas. life aspects.
Now, this emotional bond is not always of the same type, and depends largely on the way in which the interaction between these protective figures and the child occurs. Some of these forms of attachment are functional and beneficial for the child, and others are dysfunctional and capable of greatly hindering their psychological and even physical development. Besides, The way in which one or another attachment style is established during childhood usually has significant consequences in the establishment of the individual’s personality and in their way of managing their emotions and social relationships during adolescence and adulthood.
The relationship between attachment style and emotions
As we have seen, attachment has implications for people’s behavior many years after it has been established during childhood. Although it is not an innate psychological element in itself and is based above all on learning carried out unconsciously and internalized during the first years of life, that does not mean that it is easy to “unlearn” its imprint on one’s own mind: sometimes, it originated through experience is more difficult to correct than certain genetic or congenital alterations.
This is true with the different attachment styles and the way in which they predispose people to manage emotions in one way or another. Since a good part of our personality is built on what we learn during early childhood through interaction with what surrounds us and with other people, Subtle differences in the emotional bond that unites us with our fathers, mothers and caregivers can generate emotional and cognitive development as a “chain reaction” towards some attitudes or others, some beliefs or others, etc.
These are the different attachment styles and the way in which they influence our emotional side.
1. Anxious-avoidant attachment
This type of attachment occurs when Protective figures do not provide the necessary protection and emotional support and are close to parental neglect As a consequence, people who grow up in this context become accustomed to not expecting much from others, and they develop from the idea that they themselves must take care of their own well-being, without counting on the participation of others.
2. Ambivalent anxious attachment
As its name suggests, this attachment style is characterized by ambivalence. In childhood, it occurs when fathers, mothers or caregivers behave in a manner that is inconsistent and difficult to predict which makes the little one suffer when they are not present to provide protection, but at the same time feel anxious when they are around.
In adulthood, this type of development gives rise to a predisposition to generate bonds based on dependency: one feels that the other person is needed, but their presence does not provide peace of mind.
This attachment style is the most beneficial, and it occurs when the reference figures provide a balance between protection and emotional support, on the one hand, and freedom to explore the environment on one’s own initiative. In adulthood, it is reflected in a relative ease of maintaining good emotional balance and equitable and healthy personal relationships.
4. Disorganized attachment
It is the most harmful attachment style, and it occurs in highly unstructured and dysfunctional family contexts, in which it is common for there to be psychopathologies or diseases such as addiction, or even situations of domestic violence. It is capable of generating abnormal development that is likely to cause psychiatric disorders in children.
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