As we know, in general, shy people tend to participate little in social interactions and on many occasions they even decide to avoid them and run away from them. This may be due to different factors, among them is the fear caused by not knowing how to act appropriately in each social situation, which is why they also fear being rejected. On the other hand, there are people who consider themselves shy but who, despite feeling some discomfort when interacting with others, do not stop doing so and, on the contrary, seek the social contact more frequently.
When you want to stop being shy, it is because the discomfort experienced when interacting with others is so great that it does not allow the person to carry out what they want and also be able to meet their personal goals and objectives. You can always do something to put aside your shyness or to do the things you want despite being shy. In this PsychologyFor article: how not to be shy we are going to give you a series of tips that will help you overcome shyness.
Tips to overcome shyness
If you would like to be less shy since this way you could achieve some of your goals or personal purposes , such as having more friends, finding a partner, moving up a position at work, etc. Pay attention to this series of tips that, without a doubt, if you put them into practice, you will progressively notice a significant change in the way you behave.
Observe people who are not shy
Pay attention to all those people who relate fluently with others, who express their ideas without fear of making mistakes, who are more open and more extroverted. Look at the way they interact with others, how they react to certain situations, how they behave, their body language, etc. and see what behaviors you could start adopting that would help you to act more safely
Expand your social circle
It is not necessary that you make many friends or acquaintances from one moment to the next, however, try to make a conscious effort to interact, even little by little, with more people. For example, if a new person comes to work or you have a new classmate, take the initiative and be the first person to talk to them and show interest in them.
Talk to strangers
To start practicing stopping being shy, you can do it with people you don’t know and who you probably won’t see again. For example, if you are on the street, you can walk up to someone and simply ask him the time, any address , make a comment about the weather if the situation warrants it, etc. If you feel intimidated by doing so, remember that even if you make a mistake about something, this is a person you will never see again.
Dare despite fear
If you would like to attend a party or a meeting where there will be several people with whom you would like to interact, but you are afraid since you do not know most of them or simply the fact of thinking that you are going to be with several people makes you nervous, do an effort to attend despite it. Propose to attend even if it’s for an hour or a couple of hours even if you feel uncomfortable, try to interact with others and then you leave. The more you get used to doing it, the less uncomfortable you will become.
How not to be shy: more tips
If you want more tips to improve your social skills and stop being shy, you can try the following tips:
- Focus your attention on your goal, not on yourself. The mistake that many shy people make is that they focus all their attention on themselves. For example, when talking to someone or wanting to present a topic to other people, instead of their main concern being that others understand what they are trying to say, they are more concerned about not making a fool of themselves or they are thinking about what others are thinking about them right now.
- Practice. To improve your social skills, as well as the development of any other cognitive skill, requires practice. One of the ways you can do this is to stand in front of a mirror and start talking to yourself, imagining that you are doing it with someone else. This is going to help you a lot to feel more confident when you are actually talking face to face with another person.
Psychological therapy to be more sociable
If you notice that no matter how hard you try, you cannot move forward and stop being so shy, a good option would be to go to a professional to receive specialized psychological care
Through psychological therapy you will be able to know in depth where your shyness comes from, what are the behavior patterns that you usually use and that do not allow you to stop being shy, what are the thoughts or beliefs that you have been generating over time. over time and that until now have prevented you from being a more confident and open person, among other things that are undoubtedly necessary to know to start making changes that will help you get to where you want.
After knowing all this, the psychologist will be in charge of providing you with a series of tools that will help you feel more secure and comfortable within each of the social environments where you feel most insecure. Each session will also work on increasing your self-esteem and self-confidence, which will undoubtedly allow you to overcome shyness. The general objective of the therapy will be, more than making you become a more extroverted person, is that shyness does not limit you when it comes to wanting to achieve what you want, that you feel comfortable and confident and that your emotional well-being increases considerably.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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