How To Be More Patient With Your Children: 9 Useful Tips

Fatherhood and motherhood are experiences that are based, among other properties, on patience. That is why learning to be more patient with your children is essential.

In this article we will see several tips about what to do to be more patient with your children whether they are in childhood or adolescence, and make that effort have a positive impact on their education.

How can I have more patience with my children? Basic tips

In the following lines we will see several tips about how to enhance the patience that as fathers and mothers we must have when raising children. Tricks so that anger and stress do not sabotage your plans to raise and educate.

First of all, we will see those that apply especially when the little ones in the house are small children and secondly we will see what to do when the sons and daughters are teenagers.

Be more patient with the children in the family

Childhood is the stage that goes from birth to approximately 11 years of age. Let’s see how we can use psychological techniques to regulate our emotions and have more patience with the little ones in the face of their inappropriate behavior.

1. Be clear that breaking rules is normal

Nobody is born with the inertia of complying with all the usual rules in a social context (like those in your house or in any family, for example). Breaking the rules, for children, is normal, and not the exception.

Being clear about this is important to avoid frustration when plans don’t go as we wanted due to apparently irrational behavior on the part of the little ones in the house.

2. Rest before potentially conflictive situations

Never forget that as a human being, you have emotions. Therefore, do not try to always suppress them; Simply play your cards so that they go in your favor, and not against you. In this sense, knowing how to strategically use small breaks to rest is very useful

For example, if your child’s school has called to tell you that he or she has misbehaved, consider taking a few minutes to rest before heading home to where he or she is waiting for you, rather than leaving work and arriving home. with all the accumulated fatigue.

3. Make sure you give clear and simple instructions

Being clear and transparent in what is said is very important to avoid creating ambiguous situations in which it is very easy for your sons or daughters to transgress the rules. You must not forget that as an adult you must create situations in which it is easy for them to behave in an appropriate way

For example, establish clear objectives divided into several simple sub-tasks, instead of transmitting an “en bloc” obligation expressed in a very abstract way and apparently complicated to fulfill. Saying “do half of the exercises now” today is not the same as saying “always do the homework they give you at school.”

This task of creating contexts in which it is easy to behave well instead of giving orders and expecting them to follow them may seem like an extra obligation that involves more work, but in reality, if you do it, you will be saving yourself a lot of unnecessary effort and as a result it will be easier for them to end your patience. You will get less tired.

4. Develop Emotional Intelligence

This is one of the tips to have more patience with your children that works whether they are children or teenagers, and it is very important. Thanks to Emotional Intelligence we are able to identify emotional states and regulate them to suit your goals

For this, there are many Emotional Intelligence courses and workshops that can help you, although there are also relatively techniques that can help you without having received special training.

For example, get used to adopting a detached perspective when you feel that the situation with your children is beyond you, so that your anger towards them is not an obstacle. A more neutral and objective point of view is useful to stop thinking so much about how to punish them and think more about how to turn the situation around. so that the conflict with them does not worsen and they see you as an ally.

5. Take care of your health

The mental state is not separated from the physical state. Therefore, take care of your body so that you always have an energy level equal to the circumstances. This is not easy being a father or mother but you can stay within healthy limits if you sleep the right amount of hours and worry about eating healthy.

6. Always respect, even in the face of his tantrums

It is important to be clear that Regardless of the tantrums or tantrums your son or daughter may have, he or she is a human being who should be respected, even if his behavior is “uncomfortable.” It is normal for this type of behavior to be part of their repertoire of actions, and venting your anger on them for the simple fact of doing that is totally counterproductive.

Be more patient when your children are teenagers

Adolescence is a complicated stage, because many times when the youngest people go through it, the authority of their parents goes through a crisis of credibility.

That makes sometimes rebellion and transgression of basic social norms become not only something desirable because it is a way to instant gratification (doing what you want even if it harms others), but also a positive value (something that demonstrates courage and independence, for example

Therefore, it is very normal for many people with teenage children to ask themselves… “how can I be more patient with my children?” In addition to applying the principles from the previous section, which are useful in these cases as well, consider the following key ideas.

1. Do not characterize yourself as someone who imposes

It is important to have authority, but not unilaterally imposing tasks without giving your son or daughter the opportunity to say what they think of those measures.

Take their judgment seriously, regardless of whether they are right or wrong and if he’s not right make sure he understands why.

2. Remind yourself that your task is to educate, not punish

Punishments are not bad in all cases, but they should only be applied when it is really clear that there is no will to collaborate, and always making it clear why they are applied. Of course, physical punishment is ruled out

You may be interested: “The 8 reasons not to use physical punishment towards your children”

3. Share your experiences with other fathers and mothers, or with your partner

If you are not a single mother or single father, talk about your experiences with your partner and in any case, you can always count on your friends, whose experiences are especially enriching if they also have children.

Expressing your worries and frustrations not only helps you have more patience with your children on a daily basis when making sense of stressful situations; It’s also good for learning.