How To Control Emotions, With 12 Effective Strategies
Emotional control (or emotional regulation) is essential when we relate to other people, and it is a skill that is part of emotional intelligence.
Therefore, the control of emotions is included within emotional management, and To regulate them it is necessary to understand them, understand them and make them aware It is impossible to control emotions if we do not master the skill of emotional self-awareness.
Emotional intelligence: a paradigm of current psychology
Emotions are part of us, and despite being necessary and adaptive, they can cause us suffering Suffering is often caused by the negative assessment we make of these, since trying to fight against them is not a wise decision. It is much healthier to understand them, know them, know that they are there, but accept them as part of our existence and our experience, knowing that many times they are not as we would like them to be.
Emotional intelligence has become one of the most important paradigms in modern psychology, because after all, we are emotional beings. Although we think that we make our decisions thanks to reason, studies indicate that a large part of our decisions are emotional.
How to improve emotional control
Most of the success and rise of emotional intelligence (EI) is determined by its benefits Well, EI is used in different areas: sports, education and companies, because it positively affects performance, decision making and the achievement of results. But in the clinical and psychotherapeutic field it is also essential, as it helps us relate to others and improve our psychological well-being and our quality of life.
If you want to know how to improve emotional control, below you can find 11 strategies really useful to increase knowledge of this very important skill.
Take time to reflect on what you feel and why you react a certain way in some situations. You may be worried about how you behaved at work this week, yelling at a co-worker, and now you regret it. Maybe the problem was not that serious, but it simply got out of hand for not stopping for a moment to think about the real problem. Maybe the underlying problem is that you feel stressed at work because you don’t manage your time well.
One strategy to understand your emotions is to keep an emotional journal. To use it, you only need to sit in front of it, 10 or 20 minutes before going to bed. You can review the day and write down how you felt, why you felt that way, and what you could have done to improve it. Maybe the next time you find yourself in this situation you will have already learned not to behave this way.
2. Practice active listening
It may also happen that you have simply become angry for not having listened properly, in other words, you have simply heard. Many people have the habit of paying little attention to others, and while they speak, they are already thinking about what they want to say.
Active listening is important to relate to other people, because allows you to pay attention not only to what other interlocutors say with their words, but also with what they express with their body language. In fact, scientific studies affirm that verbal language represents only 30% of what we communicate. The rest is non-verbal language.
3. Do physical exercise
Physical exercise is a good way to relieve stress and release tensions that can cause frustrating and tense situations. Something that is not at all positive for emotional control. In addition, physical exercise helps us release neurochemicals related to a positive mood, such as endorphins or serotonin. Therefore, its practice also has a positive effect on our self-esteem.
4. Don’t take criticism badly
Learn to accept criticism because it can make you lose your temper and unleash your anger Being too aware of what others say about you is a symptom that you do not have enough self-confidence and have not found the inner peace necessary to control your emotions. So play it down when you receive criticism, at least if you want to be an emotionally balanced person.
One of the big problems of not accepting yourself as you are, is that you adopt a defensive mentality, which is not beneficial for emotional control. We can all make mistakes because it is part of life, so you must love yourself as you are. This way you will feel less frustrated and have more patience when dealing with conflicts that may appear in your daily interpersonal relationships.
6. Adopt an optimistic attitude
In addition to working on your self-acceptance, you must have a positive attitude toward life, which will make you more resilient and less prone to interpersonal conflicts. Both for self-acceptance and to have a positive and optimistic attitude towards life, it is necessary to have will that is, do your part to make this happen.
7. Think about the good and not the bad
The discomfort that some emotions make us feel is what causes us to want to avoid them. However, to solve the problems you have to face them, because it is useless to look the other way. If you have worked on emotional self-knowledge and self-acceptance, you must let these negative emotions pass. Now it’s your turn to focus on the positive, and your stress level will be greatly reduced
8. Retire at the right time
It is good to have a positive attitude towards conflicts and think about the good, although sometimes the stimulus may still be present no matter how much we try to avoid it, because this does not always depend on us. For example, if we are provoked to Let’s end up fighting. In these cases, it is best to turn around and leave
9. Don’t react suddenly
You may have detected that the conflict is on the surface and inside you there is a force that drives you to take a step forward without caring about the consequences of that moment (although you may regret it later). Be patient, take a deep breath and don’t react suddenly If necessary, leave the room, get some air and come back with a clear and renewed mind.
Mindfulness is an ancient practice that is very popular today due to its benefits: it improves concentration, reduces stress, improves self-awareness, etc. This method helps you be in the present moment, with a non-judgmental mindset and an attitude of compassion towards yourself and others. Without a doubt, a very important tool to control emotions.
11. Adopt a sleep hygiene routine
The better we sleep, We will be better at balancing our emotions and less vulnerable to stress and impulsivity To take advantage of this fact, establish a clear schedule that indicates what time of day you will get into bed and turn off the light; Also, make sure you have enough hours to sleep, and make the place where you do so comfortable and not expose you to noise.
12. Go to Emotional Intelligence courses
If you are interested in taking an Emotional Intelligence workshop, the Mensalus Institute offers the possibility of taking training that will help you develop the skills and abilities to become an emotionally intelligent person This psychotherapy and psychology training center teaches these workshops both in person and remotely, so you can do them from anywhere in the world, in the comfort of your own home (or wherever you want).
Specifically, the “Online Emotional Intelligence Training Course” allows you to learn and put into practice key strategies for managing thoughts and emotions. This option makes it easier to live an experience similar to in-person training but with the advantages that training offers. remotely. You will have a tutor who will monitor the practical tasks that you must carry out and the different webinars that you will be able to take part in. This training action begins on February 5, 2018, costs €380 and lasts 10 weeks (the material will be available on the virtual campus up to 8 weeks after the end of the course). For more information, you can contact Instituto Mensalus through this link.
