How To Detect If You Are In A Vicious Mental Cycle
Our mind tends to repeat, to return to what is known, to what gives us comfort, to repeat behaviors that even if they hurt us, we put them into practice again. It is important to know and observe ourselves to know what is doing us wrong and to produce healthy changes to move away from that area that causes us suffering.
Being inside a vicious circle It involves doing the same act over and over again, repeating a scene, a situation, obtaining the same or similar results. This causes the feeling of lack of a way out, absence of alternatives, inability to choose something different. To be in a vicious circle is to feel at a dead end.
“The same thing always happens to me”, “I’m not lucky”, “Why try if I won’t be able to?”: these beliefs limit ourselves and stop us from building new paths when developing as people. Generally, this is caused by low self-esteem, lack of security and self-confidence when making decisions, or by bad past experiences that hinder the present or cause fear of the future.
We register the discomfort and suffering and suspect that they are linked to a certain situation (substance use, exhausting work, toxic relationships) but many times, instead of trying to solve the problem, this discomfort paralyzes us and causes us to complain, worry, confusion, feeling of emptiness. The vicious circle we are going through remains invisible ; We feel the unpleasant effects, but it is difficult to stop and observe ourselves and analyze the entire situation.
We complain, we suffer, we get upset, without realizing that to get out of this harmful repetition we have to make decisions that allow us to break that cycle that generates wear and tear and suffering.
Types of vicious circle
We will propose 3 forms of vicious circle. Knowing their existence will allow you to detect them and get out of their trap.
1. Turning into a tiring job
If our work does not satisfy us, does not motivate us or we suffer abuse in it, we probably have feelings of frustration, helplessness, reluctance, lack of recognition and opportunities to grow professionally. This makes it difficult for us to start the work day, we wish that Monday will not arrive and we wait with all our desire for the time to escape from there.
We perceive the discomfort caused by the work we do or the conditions in which the work environment exists, but if we are in the circle we probably rotate in it with complaints, anger and frustrations, but without doing anything to change that situation.
A great obstacle to deciding to break this dynamic is fear. In this case, we may become afraid of starting a new job search and not getting a job, afraid of finding a job with more adverse conditions than the current ones, afraid of earning less money and living more comfortably.
There are no magic or unique recipes, but one of the tools to implement in this situation is to encourage yourself to make the decision to look for new job possibilities and set specific objectives, with a deadline. For example, taking the time to research job offers, using word of mouth to tell those close to us that we are interested in getting a new job, not acting impulsively and without thinking. Making a decision takes time and different steps, the first is to encourage yourself.
When you already feel that you are undertaking the difficult process of forgetting your ex and you realize that it was a relationship that was not good for you… this longing reappears! Just at that key moment, where you remembered the negative things, got angry, said it’s over, a message or a timid and suggestive like arrives on Facebook and your emotional reaction to this indicates that the seed of that mental trap is still there.
You wonder why not give it another chance, after all the relationship wasn’t that bad… Or yes, but hey, it’s easier to go back to what is known, to repeat old stories that, even if we suspect what results they could have, we put them together anyway, maybe hoping this time will be different. But the most likely thing is that as long as we do the same thing (and let the same thing be done to us) the results will be sadly the same.
Probably What prevents us from breaking this circle is the fear of loneliness no longer being loved, or feeling dependent on the other person, believing that without him/her you cannot live well. The confusion between love and need is never good.
A love relationship is a relationship of respect, trust and freedom. Being in love is not synonymous with being enslaved. If you feel this way, decide what is best for you, Look for healthy relationships and your mind and body will thank you.
3. Turning into a substance addiction
Substance addictions are a health problem caused by the compulsive consumption of drugs capable of producing dependence, both physical and psychological. The vicious circle sets in when consumption becomes excessive, uncontrolled, compulsive. That is, consume for the sake of consumption, consume because it is necessary, because the body or the head asks for it.
Stopping consumption on your own is very difficult and almost impossible for the addicted person. Containment and specialized treatment are required to be able to break this dangerous and even deadly cycle.
After compulsive consumption, come the effects of withdrawal, with which it becomes necessary to resume consumption. After this, the addicted person is likely to feel guilty, frustrated, or angry with themselves. But if the cycle is not broken, after these feelings and thoughts, consumption may return again and again, instead of reflecting and deciding to change.
Reorient ourselves towards a healthy life
Keep spinning over and over in a circle does not allow us personal growth or emotional well-being. By detecting our vicious circle, we can get out of complaining and ask ourselves why what happens to us happens, in order to begin to walk a different path in a very interesting process of change.
