It is clear that the best life is the one that we learn to live intensely, but that does not mean that we should constantly let ourselves be carried away by the torrent of emotions that our experiences produce in us.
Many times, it is important to take charge of the situation and focus on acting in a constructive way, no matter what happens. This ability is what we know as emotional strength
In fact, one of the most important aspects of Emotional Intelligence It is knowing how to distance yourself from the facts that do not allow you to examine them in a more reasonable way and identify the best options. Emotional strength consists of getting used to commitments to certain standards of well-being, living while avoiding unnecessary dramas. How can we benefit from this psychological attribute?
Exercises to train emotional strength
Below I propose a series of exercises to develop emotional strength through changes in our habits.
1. Spend time thinking about your priorities
For knowing how to distance oneself from facts when they gain a strong emotional charge it is important to be clear, first, for what purpose this is being done.
For example, when faced with arguments, do we want to satisfy our pride or maintain healthy relationships? Faced with stress due to lack of time, do we want to organize ourselves better or explore other work possibilities that we are passionate about? Reflecting on what our priorities are is essential, and it can be done at any time, for example, by writing them down hierarchically in a list.
2. Surround yourself with people you connect with
This step does not directly intervene in developing emotional strength, but it is a support. When we dedicate a good part of our time to cultivating toxic relationships, we lose the energy necessary to face crises, and consequently we let ourselves be carried away by circumstances Having an environment that welcomes us means we can better manage our psychological resources and use them in situations that are truly worthwhile.
3. Make a count of personal strengths
It seems obvious, but it is not. Many people are not aware of their strengths and assume that they are “born losers.” But if we have knowledge of what we do well at, we face problems with greater security because we know how to identify the support points that we can use to our advantage.
4. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is a good tool to reduce the stress levels that we often accumulate throughout the day. Therefore, it is something like a measure of psychological hygiene.
5. Commit
Many times a good part of our projects go down the drain of “I’ll do it tomorrow.” If we do not allow this and face those activities that really excite us, we will gain an invaluable sense of purpose that it will be good for us to have a direction to point to through all our experiences. And, when you are clear about what matters, it is more difficult to give in to vulnerabilities and manipulation by others.
In short, commit to something gives us more reasons not to give up what interests us in the same way that, for example, it is easier to continue going to the gym when you already have the routine than to go for the first time after a quarter break.
6. Train yourself in dedramatization
Examine those characteristics that you see as imperfections and ask yourself: so what? Knowing how to distance yourself from things is also that, understanding that what is not as we would like and cannot be changed should not have the power to stop us. That would be a totally unjustified limitation, a barrier that we put on ourselves and that makes our existence bitter without us considering why we are keeping it there.
7. Do the exercise: reason coldly
Give up any pretense of reaching a conclusion that you already had prepared. Distance yourself from something in which you feel some involvement and appreciate what really happens If you come to the same conclusion as always, with all the topics you do it with, ask yourself what you are doing wrong and repeat the process. Little by little, raise the level of difficulty, and use this strategy with aspects of your life that touch you very closely.
Developing emotional strength is knowing how to accommodate the effect that emotions have on us and channel them in a constructive way. In the case of anger, for example, it can be used as energy to build a world in which situations like those that bothered us do not occur as much. It’s about looking beyond yourself both in the analysis of the facts and in the application of the conclusions. Thus, this mental capacity associated with Emotional Intelligence can serve, at the same time, to make it increasingly contagious and easy to obtain from one’s own social environment.