Nowadays, the excess of communication between everyone, globalization and the ease of being able to travel make it more likely that you will start a relationship and that your partner will go to live in another city for work or that on a summer day you will meet. falling in love with a person who lives a thousand kilometers away.
On some occasions, one or both members of the couple can become exhausted by the situation and begin to suffer from jealousy, uncertainty, problems enjoying time together, lack of physical contact, among others… leading to the breakup of the relationship. relationship. But how do we do it? ¿how to end a long distance relationship ? Throughout this PsychologyFor article, we are going to try to reflect on this question.
Do long distance relationships work?
Love and long-distance relationships defy miles and maintaining a healthy relationship in these circumstances requires a great effort on both sides.
First of all, you have to be clear if you want to end the relationship or not. Having a long-distance relationship can be complicated, but despite the difficulties it might be worth it It is also possible that we are going through a relationship or personal crisis and that we move through emotions that do not lead to being more sensitive and impulsive.
How to solve problems in a long-distance relationship
Talk to your partner How you feel and check that what is happening to you is not something temporary, that it is simply a problem of lack of communication or that it is only a problem of distance that can have a solution. Ask yourself why you want to break up with this person and identify everything that makes you unhappy in the relationship. If you are clear that you want to end your long-distance relationship, we recommend that you continue reading this article.
How to end a long-distance relationship: advice from psychology
Here are some psychological tips if you want to know how to end a long distance relationship:
Do it in person
Even if the distance makes it difficult for you, it is necessary that you talk face to face with your partner and explain the situation to them. You will think that it is easier to leave it by WhatsApp or through a letter, but you will cause the situation to be cold and insensitive and the other person will feel undervalued. If it is impossible to see each other face to face, use the video call tool before chat. Eye contact helps to the understanding and expression of feelings.
Take the reins
Don’t make me do it for you. Take your responsibility and do not start maintaining behaviors that deteriorate the relationship in order for the other person to decide to leave you. Accentuating conflicts and arguments by trying to get more excuses to end the relationship or to get your partner to ask you, is not a good idea.
Plan what you want to say and be firm
Before meeting your partner, mentally organize all those ideas you want to convey. Don’t make the breakup sound like a suggestion and make your intentions clear. You should not back down out of feelings of guilt or compassion.
Find the right place
Avoid those places where you usually go together, where you know each other or where you have experienced some of the most special moments of your relationship. You have to find a place where you can have privacy
More tips to end a long-distance relationship in a healthy way
- Express your feelings It is essential that you start the conversation by indicating what you feel, what your experience is with this long-distance relationship.
- Give importance to the relationship lived Introduce that the relationship has been important to you but that keeping it at a distance has become unsustainable.
- Don’t blame! Don’t accuse him of anything in particular. Attributing blame to the other is a way of self-justifying and not facing one’s own decision. Although there may be exceptions if the other person has made a mistake, such as infidelity.
- Let your partner express what you feel about it. Have empathy and listen to his point of view. You must be patient and talk about those things that the other person needs to know.
- Avoid saying phrases like: “it’s not you, it’s me” or “maybe we can be friends.” They can make the situation worse since they are not usually honest and sincere phrases.
- Keep your distance It is difficult to stop talking, avoid saying good night or asking how you are, but all this can lead to confusion and false hope, which will not help you deal with the situation. You have to leave a margin of time to overcome the grieving stage. It’s not about never speaking again but about giving yourself time to get over the breakup.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to How to end a long distance relationship we recommend that you enter our Couples Therapy category.