The challenge of getting over the person you have fallen in love with
When we experience a situation like this, breaking up with that person becomes very painful. Some people even feel physical pain, very intense pressure in the chest or a lump in the throat that does not allow them to speak. Looping thoughts are always the same: “What have I done wrong?”, “Why don’t you call me?”, “Why are you no longer interested in me?”, “How can I win him/her back?”
Added to these questions is the need that our mind has to combat how bad we feel when thinking that that person no longer wants us by their side, to find a moment in the day to be able to draw and fantasize about a different scenario. A scenario in which this person returns, tells us that he has realized that we are very important and asks us for an opportunity.
In this sense, our mind tries to find balance to survive the very negative emotions we feel throughout the day. After all, it’s not pleasant. Getting up every day thinking about that person, what we had, and what we no longer have.
That moment of fantasy usually occurs when we go to sleep. We start our sleep with a pleasant situation that helps us rest, but this only feeds the loop in which you are stuck and does not allow you to move forward. Because? Because when we wake up the next day and see that what we would like does not happen, the pain, frustration and clash with reality is more painful.
Tips to consider
What can we do about it to get over the breakup as soon as possible?
1. Think of that person in a negative way
When we are in love, we tend to idealize the person we want to conquer. Their defects and the things we don’t like go unnoticed, becoming capable of accepting whatever is necessary in order to get their love.
Come down to reality. Stop thinking about all the good things you experienced or that he told you. Focus on thinking about what you didn’t like, what embarrassed you, or what made you feel bad. Focus on what doesn’t work for you in the present moment. Do you really think he is the love of your life? Was everything he gave you so important that you should invest time and pain in wanting to get it back?
Stop keeping track of their stories and posts, so you’ll never get them out of your head!
3. Don’t post every minute of your life to get their attention or wait for a reaction.
Whoever wants to know about you and how you are, will write to you without having to respond to a story or publication you make on social networks. If he thinks about you, he will look for you.
4. Activate your social life
If you look around you, you will realize that you have many people willing to enjoy you and dedicate their time to make you smile. Take advantage of those friends, family or colleagues, who are present in your daily life, to make plans and activities that allow you to distract yourself and appreciate the beautiful things that life has in store for you.
5. Talk about it if you need to but without it becoming the center of your conversations
Many people need to vent and share their concerns. This is very healthy if it helps you release tension and empty your mind a little of so many looping thoughts.
Some find answers or other ways of seeing the situation thanks to the feedback they receive from others, but Your heartbreak should not become the center of conversations at your social gatherings. Without realizing it, you will always be thinking and talking about the same thing. We unconsciously feed something that we must eliminate from our thoughts.
6. Take physical distance from that person
Do not provoke encounters or frequent the places where you know you will find him. Don’t fool yourself. You know where you can find this person, and if they have already shown you that they have no interest in you, do not provoke encounters that will do nothing but cause you more pain.
When there is pain, something is not working well. When there is no interest, there are no signals. Asking ourselves hundreds of questions will only serve to feed our anguish. We don’t have the answers, only the facts. And you know well that when we want to know something about someone, we sharpen our ingenuity to get in touch with that person. We are capable of moving heaven and earth to find it. If someone is looking for you, they will find you, but stop wanting to get to that place where no one is waiting for you. Love yourself, value yourself and you will find what you deserve without having to suffer to get it.
