If you are wondering right now how to take initiative in a relationship, it is probably because not doing so may be causing you problems either with your current partner or with your previous partners. It may also occur to you that you would simply like to change the passive attitude that you feel that you have been manifesting until now in your relationships.
What is preventing you from taking the initiative in a relationship? How can you take the initiative sexually with your partner? In this PsychologyFor article, we are going to give you a series of tips that you can take into account to know how to have initiative in a relationship
The reasons why you are having a lack of initiative with your partner vary from one person to another and you must also take into account the situation in which each person finds themselves. However, below we are going to explain the main causes why this happens.
Factors related to personality. There are certain personality traits that influence one person to have more initiative than another. Some of these traits may be, for example, those related to shyness, low self-esteem, insecurity, passive-aggressive personality traits, etc.
Disinterest. Lack of interest is one of the triggers that makes it difficult for a person to have their own initiative. It may be that you do not feel completely comfortable in your relationship, that they have fallen into monotony and each time one or both of you feel more determined to get out of there or that you simply do not feel a real desire to have your own initiative.
Your partner always takes the initiative. Another possible reason is that your partner always takes the initiative and you find it comfortable to take the passive position.
Fear of doing new things. There are people who are very afraid to dare to do different things, so they are used to other people always taking the initiative. Taking the initiative implies in some way “risking” that what is done or planned does not work as one wants and that is what can generate a certain fear and insecurity.
How to take initiative in a relationship
The lack of incentive in a relationship and any other type of relationship such as friendship, can sometimes cause some type of conflict that, although it is not something serious or an attack against someone else, can sometimes cause a breakup of the relationship. The fact that a woman or a man does not have initiative in a relationship is not a sufficient reason why your partner wants to end the relationship, however, it is true that doing so gives them a different and special touch from which they can obtain certain benefits.
Here are some tips so that you can have greater initiative in your relationship.
Plans to get out of the routine
Get used to constantly proposing plans to your partner that are different from the ones they usually make. Investigate what other options they have to go out and enjoy your free time that catches both of their attention and that until now they have not carried out. Avoid falling into monotony or having your partner constantly suggest what to do.
Avoid saying “I don’t know”
It usually happens in some couples that when deciding what they are going to do, they end up doing nothing because of the time they lose by being undecided. So try that every time a similar situation happens and your partner asks you what to do or where you want to go, instead of responding with “I don’t know” as you would usually do, propose something specific even if you are not clear about it. If you want to know more about this advice, we recommend reading the following article: some ideas to overcome indecision.
Lose the fear
It is necessary that so that you can begin to take initiative in your relationship and even in any type of relationship that you lose the fear that something may “go wrong.” Remember that nothing ventured nothing gained And if you want to avoid falling into monotony or that your partner, in this case, becomes bored by always doing the same thing or because she is always the one who takes the initiative, you have to dare despite the fear. With practice, that fear that you now have will diminish and little by little you will get used to adopting this type of attitude.
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How to take the initiative in bed
Would you also like to learn to take the initiative sexually? Pay attention to these tips to revive the passion in your couple.
Be the first to propose it. Don’t wait for your partner to propose their next sexual encounter. Dare to take the first step, take the initiative to make love and don’t think about whether in the end he will accept or not, just do it without worrying about the result. As long as you notice that your partner is willing to do it, it’s not about forcing the situation either.
Suggest new places to have sex. Test your creativity and think of some new places where you think it might be exciting to have sex. They don’t have to be extraordinary places, the point is that they come out of the routine and you are the one who makes that proposal.
Forget the shame. It is strictly necessary that you put aside shame if you want to start taking the initiative sexually, since otherwise you will definitely not be able to achieve it.
Tell your partner what you like. Don’t expect your partner to try to guess what you like, so you need to be the one to tell them directly.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to How to have initiative in a relationship we recommend that you enter our Couples Therapy category.
