There is a lot of talk about leadership, a fundamental skill not only for the working world, but also for personal life. It is a desired skill, very valuable in these times but, to be developed, it is necessary to have two things: self-esteem and leadership.
Those who are not capable of leading their own life will find it very difficult to do so with other people. He will not be the owner of his life either, which will make him a victim of circumstances, emotionally dependent on his context and feeling that he can do little or nothing.
Self-leadership has a lot to do with achieving goals, feats that make us perceive ourselves as more effective people and, therefore, develop better self-esteem of us. Let’s see how to improve self-esteem and, especially, self-leadership.
In recent times, the word “leadership” has been mentioned so many times that it is surprising that it has not become worn out. It is very common in the workplace to talk about team management, with leadership understood as the ability to direct and motivate other people. But, before addressing other people, we must know how to address ourselves, control our emotions and regulate our behaviors. We must perfect self-leadership.
Self-leadership can be defined as the ability to influence, intentional and conscious, over one’s own thoughts, emotions and behaviors with the aim of achieving objectives that we have proposed. It is directing and redirecting one’s life, building the present and the future, taking the helm and not deviating from the course. It is being the owner of our own lives. This capacity is fed by a set of psychological elements that, if perfected and improved, increases the probability of achieving objectives, even if there is a certain limitation of resources and uncertainty.
It should be noted that self-leadership is strongly related to emotional intelligence, specifically intrapersonal intelligence. This is so since it requires important emotional management and regulation, in addition to being aware and knowing our strengths and weaknesses, and using that information to our benefit. Self-leadership is nourished by skills such as persistence, maintaining motivation, discipline and determination.
The main consequence of having good self-leadership is personal empowerment Knowing how to lead ourselves implies greater control of our lives, avoiding excesses and sacrificing ourselves to succeed, which will bring us satisfaction, fulfillment and happiness. Self-leadership involves making decisions independently, staying focused on achieving personal goals. Feeling that we are being consistent and succeeding in what we have set out to do has an impact on greater emotional well-being, personal growth, greater security and self-confidence.
It is said that there are five most important psychological processes that influence self-leadership and that, in turn, are influenced by this same capacity. These five processes are known as the 5 A’s of self-leadership.
1. Self-knowledge
Self-knowledge can be defined as the ability to recognize and detect our own emotions and thoughts, understanding how they affect us and what consequences they imply on our behavior. Furthermore, this skill involves understanding and knowing the personal resources we have, our strengths, weaknesses and limitations.
2. Autonomy
Autonomy is the ability of people to set your own priorities and objectives independently It implies having sufficient capacity to form personal criteria, make decisions and assume responsibility for our actions.
3. Self-management
Self-management is the ability to regulate emotions, behaviors and own resources to direct them towards a proposed objective This psychological process is fundamental in self-leadership, as it implies being able to analyze and control actions without external help and readjust them if the situation requires it.
4. Self-motivation
Self-motivation is the ability to influence one’s own state of mind, as well as being persistent enough to maintain an appropriate emotional state to achieve the goal we have set for ourselves We could say that it is made up of initiative, commitment to objectives, will, achievement orientation and optimism.
5. Self-esteem
And last but not least, we have self-esteem. It is commonly defined as the set of perceptions, evaluations and assessments that an individual makes of himself in terms of value, way of being and qualities.
The relationship between self-esteem and self-leadership is bidirectional If we have good self-esteem, we will feel more motivated and oriented to achieve our personal goals simply by valuing ourselves more and feeling that we are capable of achieving them. In turn, if we are people with this capacity for self-regulation, we will feel satisfied with everything we have achieved and are achieving and, consequently, our self-esteem will increase.
Strategies to improve self-esteem and self-leadership
The strategies that we are going to see below are mostly aimed at improving self-leadership, although many of them, if applied to our lives, will increase our self-esteem.
Having good self-leadership has a positive impact on our lives, both personally and at work, being a source of well-being as we feel that we are competent and regulated people. Training it is possible and below we see how to enhance self-leadership:
1. Know yourself
It is essential to know yourself to develop good self-leadership. We must be aware of our strengths and weaknesses in order to know which skills or aptitudes we have more developed and which ones we should perfect. To do this, we can think about those situations in which we believe we acted correctly and competently and those in which we believe not so much.
We can also ask people close to us to evaluate us, to tell us what they think are our strengths and weaknesses or what they think we excel at. By doing this, we can get an idea of what resources we have and what our limitations are.
All this It will help us to be realistic when setting a goal proposing something affordable but also ambitious enough to feel that we are achieving something as a result of our effort and determination.
2. Perfect our weak points
Once the limitations and weak points have been identified, it is time to work on them The most advisable thing is to work from the information we have obtained about these qualities. It is a learning exercise, so we must look for possible activities or tasks that can improve these weaknesses.
If these weak points include problems interacting with others, it is essential to work on them because they influence both self-esteem and self-leadership. We can resort to various resources: go to a professional specialized in social skills training or sign up for group activities such as theater, team sports, associations…
3. Draw a wheel of life
The wheel of life is a classic in the repertoire of personal growth tools. Fundamental to enhancing our self-esteem and self-leadership, it basically consists of drawing a circle and dividing it into ten sections, although this number is only a guide.
Each section represents an area to change or improve in our lives and, once chosen, we must prioritize them by assigning them a number according to the priority or importance that we believe they have. Using this, we analyze our present and focus on the future.
4. Set goals
Self-leadership does not just happen. Just as muscles must be trained so as not to atrophy, self-leadership is improved by setting increasingly ambitious goals in line with our abilities. Ambitious does not mean that they must be extremely difficult, but that help us improve as individuals and feel that we are moving forward
Within a certain ambition, the objectives must be realistic, achievable by putting a little more effort than we used to put before and, also, that they are easy to measure and evaluate in order to check whether or not we are really regulating our volitions and achieving that goal. that we have proposed.
It is highly recommended to break down the final objectives into short, medium and long term objectives By achieving more attainable goals, small but still requiring effort, our self-esteem will increase as we feel that we are achieving it and that we are getting closer and closer to the final goal.
5. Develop habits
Self-leadership is nourished by habits At first it is normal for us to find it difficult to do something, but once we have established it as a habit that we do out of inertia, it will cost us little to get into it. The development and maintenance of self-discipline is a very positive aspect, something that will make us value ourselves more and, consequently, have greater self-esteem.
One should not think that self-leadership is synonymous with working, working and more working. It is one thing to make an effort and be hardworking, focused on obtaining a specific goal or achievement, and quite another to exhaust yourself to the limit thinking that the maximum sacrifice always pays off. It is not like this. Being more tired, physically and mentally, will only make us make worse decisions in the long run This is why it is so important to know how to rest when it’s time.
Some people find it very difficult to get down to work on one of their obligations, but once they have started, they can also find it very difficult to stop. They spend hours and hours glued to it, ignoring what is happening around them and trying to combat fatigue. It is not the best way to be productive, because the more tired we are the worse we perform
When we see that we are not in the best state, it is best to stop and take a well-deserved rest. Of course, you also have to know how to stop, respecting the break time we have set for ourselves. It is one thing to stop to regain energy and another is to rest longer than necessary and lose concentration.
7. Check and readjust
Once in a while we will have to monitor and evaluate how our progress is happening In case we see that we are deviating a little from the path, the thing to do is to make the pertinent adjustments to get it back on track. It is essential that, from time to time, we analyze progress and evaluate how we feel, making the necessary changes to the initial planning to redirect us to our goals.
8. Value both the process and the result
Don’t settle for reaching the goal. Like any path, this will have been one full of learning and lessons to apply for the future The goal is the end of the path, the final evidence that we have been self-directed people and that we have known how to move forward, something that will undoubtedly feed our self-esteem. Valuing the process is almost as much or more important than the result itself.
We must extract the possible learning and lessons that the path has brought us, whether long or short, easy or difficult, in order to extrapolate them to future paths that we want to follow in order to achieve goals that we want to achieve in the future. Do this exercise of introspection and contemplation of how much we have achieved It will help us feel better about ourselves, seeing that we are capable of much
Are you interested in enhancing your self-leadership and self-esteem?
Do you want to improve your self-esteem and self-leadership with our 8-week MBSR programs or also in special individual sessions? Get in contact with us.
At Mente Feliz we offer Mindfulness courses for groups and in individualized sessions taught by a psychologist and certified Mindfulness instructor.
