How To Open Up More To Other People: 6 Tips For Socializing
Human beings are gregarious in nature, and regardless of our personality characteristics, we need contact with others in order to achieve adequate social development, which allows us to learn from others and know ourselves better.
In this article Let’s see how to open up more with other people, so that we can overcome shyness or excessive jealousy for privacy that often prevents us from making contact with others. We will also see some of the reasons why we could have problems socializing.
Why do I find it difficult to open up to other people?
To see how to open up more with other people, we must understand that this psychological limitation when relating to others can be due to a variety of personal or social factors.
For example, There are individuals who are introverted in nature for whom it is much more difficult than the rest to initiate friendships or have spontaneous social contact, since they feel less interest in intellectual stimuli outside their body. These introverted people are radically different from those who are capable of interacting with any stranger at the public transport stop, or while waiting for their turn to pay in line at the supermarket.
The ideal is to have an adequate balance between introversion and extroversion; conflicts in relating to other people often arise when the subject is at one of the extremes of these two aspects.
For example, a subject who is too introverted will have problems socializing because he or she does not feel comfortable during social protocols, while those who are too extroverted will have problems socializing due to their exacerbated behavior in search of external stimuli.
Some parenting styles could also negatively influence how you open up to others Those individuals who were raised under an overly protective style may present difficulties in terms of self-confidence and self-esteem, which makes interpersonal relationships difficult.
On the other hand, those who were raised in a completely permissive environment will present social difficulties based on not knowing the limits; They are subjects who generally believe that everything is allowed to them and do not easily understand when to give up or reduce the intensity of the contact.
How to be more socially open?
The irrational fear of interacting with others is motivated by social anxiety, which arises when the subject assumes that any contact that occurs between him or her and other people will end badly in some way. That is to say, the person anticipates his social failure and this predisposes him to make mistakes
To reduce this pattern of thinking, it is necessary to do a logic exercise where we answer key questions to ourselves. Why am I afraid of contact with others? Does it make sense that you are afraid of contact with strangers? Why do I think things will always go wrong?
By answering these questions you will realize that in most cases there is really nothing serious to fear regarding social relationships, and you will become predisposed to leave limiting thoughts behind that generate the feeling of social anxiety.
However, to learn to open up more with other people you have to move from words to actions, and this is not easy: it requires practice, and not just questioning certain beliefs. That is to say that as long as you limit yourself to reflection, you will not make significant progress where it matters, which is the context of real-time interaction with people who talk to you.
In the next few lines we are going to examine a list of practical tips so that you can improve your way of opening up to social relationships.
1. Accept the difficulty in contact
The first step should always be accept that we have a difficulty with social relationships Regardless of the causes, it is important that we do not evade this fact and set out to recognize where we can improve.
There are unconscious defense mechanisms that make it difficult for us to recognize our own limitations, and make us look the other way. For example, when we shift blame to other people or circumstances we are distancing ourselves from the real issue.
2. Relaxation techniques to reduce social anxiety
There are several simple exercises that can help you lower your general anxiety levels, and that are useful before and during certain intense social interactions. For example, controlled diaphragmatic breathing exercises can help, as well as certain Mindfulness exercises that only take a few minutes. Besides, Some of them are so simple that you can put them into practice without it being noticed, although the ideal is that you do them in a quiet space that offers you privacy
3. Create trusted links
Trust is essential for a friendship relationship to transcend. That is why we must try to make people feel confident with us. We will not achieve this in a forced or hasty way ; The ideal is to let the relationship gradually acquire these nuances.
Some methods to build trust with others can be; tell them some personal anecdotes about ourselves, expose our own vulnerabilities and ask for the opinion of others about a topic that is significant to them.
To achieve quality relationships and have the necessary strength to open ourselves to other people, it is necessary to first work in our garden (ourselves). We must be able to see the value we have as people and understand that we are on equal terms with others when we interact.
A good way to achieve this is to do a personal affirmations exercise; We stand in front of a mirror and tell the person in front of us several reasons why they should be valued. For example, “you are noble because you like to help other people,” etc.
5. Avoid prejudices
Prejudices are generalized thinking styles in which there is an all or nothing situation, of categorical thinking, when evaluating others These kinds of experiences only plunge us deeper into anxiety and hopelessness about properly relating to others, because they lead us to feel like we don’t fit in.
It is important to keep in mind that not all people are the same, even though we all have different tastes in certain aspects.
6. Do not change your essence
To please, many people go to the point of abandoning their principles or their tastes only to be accepted in groups. However, this is counterproductive, because There is no point in losing yourself in the process of pleasing others
Remember that principles are not negotiated, you must always be you and make others see that you are capable of respecting their opinions even if you do not agree with them, as long as they do the same with you.
