Knowing how to overcome fear can be what makes the difference between leading a life limited to the comfort zone or launching towards the goals that can really make us gain happiness. No change for the better comes without effort, and part of it must be aimed at overcoming those thresholds of uncertainty and doubt that impose so much.
In this article we will review some simple guidelines that will help us overcome fear and that, although they will not eliminate it completely, they will cushion its effects.
Fear is one of the basic emotions of human beings, and its importance is due to the fact that, in many situations, it is useful to us. No matter how unpleasant it may be when experienced firsthand, this psychological phenomenon is what leads us to avoid many situations that carry a real risk, either because they carry a high possibility of causing physical harm, or because they can harm us in any other way. manner.
Of course, fear does not have to be a mechanism that allows us to perfectly guess which situations will really harm us, but this is inevitable. That’s not the problem. The bad thing comes when we unconsciously use fear as an excuse not to leave the comfort zone, or when, due to certain learned dynamics, we internalize the idea that we must fearing certain things that don’t carry such a high risk
What to do in these situations? These tips will help you.
1. Learn the logic of emotional memory
Much of the fear we feel is explained through emotional memory. This is an information storage system that It has to do exclusively with emotions , and not with concepts that can be easily explained with words. It is known that emotions are processed differently than, for example, our memories of what we had for dinner yesterday, and this means that they are sometimes associated with new experiences even though we have “memorized” them in totally different contexts.
Therefore, know that it is not your fault for feeling afraid. This is part of brain mechanics that It is unconscious and we cannot directly control Our efforts must be directed at creating the possibilities that fear will no longer be associated with certain situations that are not really dangerous, or are not dangerous to the extent to which we perceive them.
2. Get closer little by little to what you fear
This is the logic followed in psychological treatments applied to phobias , but it also works for non-pathological fears. To know how to control fear you must be clear that you will have to suffer a little, but only just enough.
This means that you must make progressive approaches to those situations that you fear, to gradually move towards situations that are more difficult for you. At first, get a little closer to those environments or those actions, then go a little further then even further… The difficulty curve always has to be ascending, but you will have more and more preparation each time.
It is good that you establish a gradation beforehand, ordering those situations from those that cause less fear to those that generate more fear, and that you establish deadlines in which you must achieve each of these objectives.
3. Let yourself be helped
As we’ve seen, fear is nothing to be ashamed of, so there’s no reason you should avoid getting help. Given the irrational nature of these fears, it never hurts to have the security that the presence of others can give you and their assistance or intervention in specific cases.
Think that although this emotion is powerful, you have the power to modify your environment to achieve your goals even in the moments when you think you are losing control. Establishing the necessary alliances for others to help makes us help ourselves indirectly, creating tools to solve problems when our ability to think clearly fails us.
This is one of those tricks to overcome fear that many ovbian because they believe that the psychological is treated through individual work or through introspection: nothing could be further from the truth.
4. Learn to recognize if you need therapy
The line between pathological fear and non-pathological fear is not always clear, but you should be clear that if the fear you feel is very extreme, you may need professional help to progress. Fortunately, these types of psychological problems are relatively easy to treat if you undergo psychotherapy, and the results can be seen in a matter of a few weeks.
Of course: fear will never completely go away, but it will no longer paralyze us or prevent us from getting closer to our objectives. Although this is, in part, even positive. Doing something that feels partly like a challenge makes us feel better about having overcome it.
