There are many people who suffer from insecurity problems. Feeling that you are not up to the task, that everyone is capable of progress but you yourself do not have enough ability, etc. Coping with this type of self-sabotage is not easy, but achieving it usually does a lot of good, since it makes it easier to solve various problems derived from it.
In this article we will review some basic tips to know how to overcome insecurity through changes that must be introduced in day-to-day habits.
Like practically everything in psychology, insecurity has multiple causes, although there are several that are very common. Fundamentally, it is a distorted view of one’s own abilities from an extremely pessimistic point of view, which generates a self-fulfilling prophecy effect.
That is to say, having very low expectations about what oneself is capable of doing means that one does not even have exciting initiatives that are a challenge. As time goes by, this perception that one remains in a state of stagnation causes insecurities to be reinforced and self-esteem to remain low.
The idea that much of this monotony and lack of achieved vital milestones is due to oneself stays in the comfort zone It does not gain enough prominence for the perception of our own defects to determine the way we think about ourselves.
On the other hand, one of the areas of life in which insecurities are most noticeable are personal relationships. Something as simple as adopting non-verbal language that denotes insecurity has the effect that others treat us consistently, so that in every conversation and social interaction the message is captured that there are indeed reasons to feel insecure. It is a vicious circle that over time generates a dogma, a belief that is not even questioned: we are worth less than others.
How to overcome insecurity on a daily basis
Below you will find several ideas from which you can start to progressively strengthen your self-esteem. Keep in mind that the simple act of reading will not solve a problem of insecurities, but this is achieved by introducing different habits into your daily life, which we will talk about in the following lines.
In any case, it is important to keep in mind that the objective is not to eliminate insecurities, but to overcome them; that is to say, prevent them from significantly interfering with one’s well-being or that are obstacles to developing all the personal potential one has.
1. Write down your strengths and insecurities
Even the most insecure people are able to recognize certain things that, compared to the rest of their repertoire of skills, they are good at. Therefore, a good starting point is to write down a list of personal weaknesses and strengths. It is important that these are valued not by comparing ourselves with the rest, but by comparing those physical and psychological characteristics that belong to oneself.
This step will allow two things. On the one hand, it is a starting point that helps you focus more on the good things you have and on the other, if it is done with a certain periodicity, it helps to have information about how one’s own insecurities evolve.
2. Check for tendencies toward paranoia
Many people base their insecurity on almost paranoid thoughts, constantly ruminating about the supposed intentions to hurt us or make fun of us that others hide behind an appearance of normality. Therefore, it is positive to spend about five minutes, at the end of the day, to look back and assess whether you have fallen into this type of thinking unjustifiably.
3. Ask others for space
Changes must not only occur in oneself, but the social environment must also evolve. Ultimately, when you are insecure, others may be more inclined to make hurtful judgments out loud, even without having a direct intention to cause harm, simply because they see that that kind of criticism fits with what the other person thinks about themselves. same. Where others keep certain opinions silent so as not to spend the day criticizing the person they are talking to, this regulation of what is said decreases in the case of those who have low self-esteem.
Therefore, it is good to express directly that certain comments are unnecessary, since they are inappropriate. The good thing about these situations is that the other person, in most cases, will stop trying to maintain a dominant position in the conversation if it is someone who is fond of us, and will immediately see the error of their ways. On the other hand, This is an exercise in assertiveness which helps to reinforce self-esteem by the simple fact of seeing that these types of complaints are accepted by others, denoting that many of the criticisms received on a daily basis are unfounded.
With the rise of social media, it is extraordinarily easy to give an image of what you are not. One in which only the positive is highlighted, and the negative is ignored. This is something that facilitates the appearance of insecurities, because on certain digital platforms idealization is the norm.
Therefore, every time you are assaulted by a thought based on your own inferiority to others that is fundamentally known through Facebook, Instagram or the like, remember that it is a mirage. There is no reason to think that this person is perfect or even almost perfect, and there are many reasons to think that the image we have of that “other” is very distorted.
5. Practice sports and eat well
The good thing about this pattern is that it is based on the repetition of relatively simple behavioral patterns. Seeing how you progress physically over a few months is very motivating, and helps improve self-esteem.
