Each family is unique, and the type of relationships established between the people who make it up can be very diverse.
The family is part of one of the main areas in which we develop as people and, therefore, everything that happens in it and the relationships we establish with the other members of it will affect the way in which we develop. we relate to other people as well as our general well-being.
We therefore want to offer some guidelines that allow generating more positive and appropriate relationships between family members
Follow these recommendations to apply them to the day-to-day life of your family.
1. Communication
We could say that it is a cornerstone that supports the foundation of right relationships It consists of maintaining good communication, listening to others, making sure that what we say reaches our interlocutor, that the message has arrived properly and that we are willing to listen to the other person.
We especially have to dedicate attention and time to listening to our children. Sometimes we consider them passive subjects within the family, and this is making a mistake, since in the end they are just another piece of the family machine.
2. Respect
It is basic to understand that family relationships must be based on respect. Besides, It is important that if we want to instill “respect” towards someone we be an example of it as educators For this reason, it is much more beneficial that we communicate with others appropriately.
We must not confuse setting limits and rules or even having moments of discussion with falling into insults, contempt and reproaches. Respect must be bilateral and not unilateral.
3. Understanding and empathy
One of the main problems that psychologists encounter when there are problems in family relationships is the lack of empathy or understanding of the other family member’s position.
We often make the mistake of thinking that “what I feel” is more important than what others feel or that our opinion or preference should be valued more, as well as even being in “possession of the truth.” It is especially important to be able to understand that each person lives their reality in a unique way and that what for me may be the “right” or “the right way” to do something does not have to be the same for the other person.
Trying to focus on why the other person thinks, what they feel and how to help them fosters confidence among family members, a feeling of security and being able to communicate in a more appropriate way, since it will always be easier to express something when we see that another person He is showing understanding.
4. Give and receive positive
If we want to improve relationships It is not enough to eliminate possible arguments or moments of tension but it is also important to be able to generate positive emotions As with a couple, if in the family environment we do not find anything that makes us feel good and that we like, it is more likely that we will end up spending little time with others and the relationships will cool down.
Looking for common points, joint activities that we can enjoy as a family is essential to improve these relationships. Here the factor of “giving in” also appears and understanding that sometimes doing something for others even though I don’t particularly like it is not something negative. Giving in would always be a problem, but doing so occasionally is not.
5. Conflict resolution/reach agreements
Normalizing that arguments will occur on many occasions but that there are always effective ways to address them will allow us to manage these situations in a much more appropriate way. In the same way It is important that we let the other person express themselves and give their arguments
Once we have presented the arguments, it is best to try to reach agreements whenever possible, but sometimes this will not be achieved and leaving aside the discussion can also be a way to resolve it.
Final recommendations
It should be noted that these are some important recommendations and factors but they are by no means an exact formula. It is necessary to analyze in each family what the main reasons for conflict are or why there are difficulties in relationships Each family and family dynamic is very different, and therefore solutions must be adapted to different types of problems. Even so, these recommendations are part of the basis for establishing good relationships between family members.
It is also important to comment that Sometimes “having a good relationship” is confused with “consent.” That is to say, sometimes it is thought that the best way to maintain a good relationship with one’s children is through permissiveness and giving everything the person wants. This can lead to problems regarding family limits and norms, developing later conflicts, especially during adolescence.
Finally, sometimes family relationships can be improved with a few techniques and tools, but, In some cases, the problems are much more deep-seated have become generalized over time or become more complex for which the help of a psychologist may be required to guide family members.
