People are social animals, which means that we are beings that need interaction with others, to such an extent that throughout our evolution as a species we have developed a system of societies that allows us to enjoy the feeling that we belong to others. something much bigger than us.
From this point of view, it would be logical to think that all people manage to develop the same socialization skills, but this is not the reality at all. Due to different influencing factors, some people are unable to develop these skills completely, so throughout this article we will see some tips on how to socialize better
The act of socializing, also known as socialization, is a process that practically all people go through and that consists of the cognitive assimilation of all elements, principles and sociocultural foundations of their environment to then integrate them into the structure of their personality, all of them mediated by the influence of their life experiences and social agents.
This process is carried out thanks to the actions of social agents, which are made up of the family environment, the school, peers and even the media and institutions.
Within all these agents, The family is considered an essential piece in the socialization process since it represents our first contact with people different from ourselves and serves as a guide for our first contacts with the outside world.
In second place is school, within this context we learn the guidelines to follow for interaction with our peers, as well as a first contact with authority figures other than parents or guardians.
Among people there are great differences when developing the skills that allow us to socialize with the rest. While some exhibit great abilities to relate and generate friendships in a very simple way, for others it requires a great effort.
These difficulties in meeting people and making friends can cause great feelings of frustration and anguish, since the person feels the need and wants to interact with others but their ignorance or lack of skills makes it impossible.
The skills that allow us to interact with others and establish positive friendship and personal bonds They are known as social skills This concept encompasses all those behaviors and behaviors carried out by the person within an interpersonal context.
It basically consists of the expression of emotions, feelings, desires and opinions in an effective and appropriate manner according to the situation in which the person finds themselves. In addition, it is also characterized by the ability to respect others and solve problems effectively, minimizing consequences and future complications.
The reason some people don’t have these skills is because They have not had the opportunity to learn them and put them into practice either due to inadequate or not very direct learning models, or due to the interference of negative thoughts or insecurities due to negative life experiences.
7 tips to socialize better
However, like the rest of the skills, these can be learned and practiced. Although with the passage of time this may become a little more complicated, it is never too late to change or improve socialization habits and patterns.
Next we will review a series of suggestions that will not make it easier to interact with other people and they will help us feel more comfortable.
1. Start small
Because of the tension that can come with starting a conversation or contact with another person, it’s worth starting small. Choose places that are not crowded, that allow you to have a quiet conversation with one or two people.
Choosing everyday contexts in which people talk naturally or habitually, such as supermarket queues, and starting a small casual interaction will allow us to practice and lose the fear of starting conversations
In the same way, it is advisable to start with small comments, which can lead to a conversation but without resulting in far-fetched or excessively deep expressions or sentences. Circumstantial comments that show points in common with the other person are usually very effective when creating a bond.
2. Smile
Of course we are not referring to forced or constant smiles, since these can transmit a feeling of strangeness or distrust to other people. Smiling when someone approaches, when funny comments are made, and maintaining a relaxed and casual facial expression will help us feel close to people and that they feel comfortable with us
3. Maintain adequate eye contact
Looking at people while they are talking is a sign that you are listening and makes it easier to bond with others. Otherwise it will seem that we are not in the least interested in what matters and this can create a barrier between the two.
In the same way, if we are the ones who speak too It is advisable to maintain eye contact with our interlocutor or interlocutors since this conveys security and also facilitates the creation of personal ties or friendship.
Socializing with involves only talking to other people, but also attending to them and actively listening to what they are not saying. Active listening will allow us to collect enough information from the other person to be able to formulate the appropriate questions and comments, which will allow us to continue the conversation effectively and transmit interest in the other.
5. Observe
Observing the people around us or with whom we are having a conversation can give us a lot of information about them, such as how they feel when talking about a topic. This information will allow us to connect with them and facilitate the start and progress of the conversation.
6. Stay informed
Knowing what is happening around us, what the latest news and events are will provide us with a wide range of topics to start conversations with and be able to intervene effectively in debates that may arise during social gatherings.
7. Don’t judge
If when you arrive at a meeting space the first thing you do is make value judgments, you will create a barrier between you and the rest of the people, since you will eliminate the possibility of getting to know them and what they really are like, especially if these judgments are negative.
In the same way, making negative criticisms or value judgments of people you have just met It usually conveys a very bad image, so you will only manage to keep these people away from you.
