I Can’t Stop Thinking: Possible Causes And Solutions
Think of a white bear. Now, she stops thinking about him. You’ve got it? Probably not. It is very difficult to deliberately stop thinking about something. The human mind does not have a magic button to eliminate a thought from the plane of consciousness. We’ll just have to wait for it to go away on its own.
In our daily lives there are many intrusive thoughts that can invade our minds. Some do it for only a few minutes, while others, more worrying, keep us thinking about them for hours and hours, they cause us discomfort and, the more we try to make them go away, the more strongly they attach themselves to our consciousness.
“I can’t stop thinking” is the reality that frustrates many who cannot get rid of ideas and images of disturbing content.. His worries, obsessions, and ruminations take over. Let’s see what they can do.
I can’t stop thinking: understanding this psychological problem
The thoughts that come to mind involuntarily are known as intrusive thoughts. These are ideas or images that come to mind without being relevant, either because we have seen or heard something that has awakened them or because they have simply appeared. Having them is something completely normal and, at first, we should not worry because from time to time ideas come to mind without us wanting them.
However, we should not ignore the fact that intrusive thoughts are precisely the fuel they use. psychological processes such as worries, obsessions, and rumination. They are ideas and images that echo inside our skull and, if they make us uncomfortable and we try to fight them so that they leave us alone, it turns out that they become stronger. What you try to stop thinking about, you think even more intensely.
“I can’t stop thinking.” This is the recurring phrase in those who have been trapped in a whirlwind of recurring intrusive thoughts. Worries and obsessions flood your mind, making you turn over and over to the same topic. Sometimes, the discomfort caused by these involuntary thoughts is so great and the feeling of lack of control is so demotivating that it stops us from wanting to do anything, like going out with friends or enjoying a television series.
What can we do to stop thinking? We already mentioned that it is difficult, and that it all comes down to being lucky enough that intrusive ideas do not appear again, in addition to going to psychotherapy.
Egodystonic thoughts
Everyone can experience intrusive thoughts. It is normal. They appear from time to time and, just as they came, they leave. However, sometimes they can be very disturbing and cause us discomfort. This is especially the case when the intrusive thoughts are egodystonic, that is, they conflict with the individual’s values or self-concept. The person perceives them as unacceptable.
The ideas and images that we do not want and that we perceive do not leave us alone can bring with them a whole irrational interpretation of them. Since we don’t stop thinking about them and we get frustrated because this is the case, we begin to have related thoughts, generally negative ones, which only further cement the original annoying idea. It brings out all kinds of dysfunctional beliefs. about it such as, for example, “it is bad to have these thoughts”, “if I think about it it means I will do it”, “what happens to me is not normal”…
Obsessions, worries and rumination
When we cannot stop thinking about something it is because we are immersed in psychological processes that do not stop thinking about the same idea or image. Depending on the content of the thought, we can mainly talk about three phenomena:
Obsessions
Obsessions are intrusive and repetitive thoughts. These may be ideas or images that are not desired by the individual and that he considers unacceptable, causing him discomfort because he notices that he has no control over them. Since he wants to get rid of these ideas, the person tries to implement various actions with the intention of controlling them, without any success.
Concerns
Worries are anticipatory thoughts about what could happen in the future.. As their name suggests, they are “pre-occupations”, it is keeping the mind busy with something that has not yet happened, and that we are not sure if it will happen. Negative consequences are foreseen and an attempt is made to find a solution to certain problems.
It should be said that the concerns They are not pathological in and of themselves.. In fact, they can be considered adaptive as long as they are used to prevent or solve real problems. Once these problems are solved, the concern should cease to exist.
However, worries become problematic when they lose control and lead to a whole train of thoughts about what bad things could happen in the future, posing extremely catastrophic scenarios. In this case, we would talk about worries with surreal content, which deal with extremely improbable events, but which the person cannot stop thinking about and truly fears will happen.
Rumination
Rumination focuses on past events. It is the fact that the person thinks over and over again what happened to him, mistakes he made, significant losses, missed opportunities or things he would have liked to do that he did not do. It is a psychological process that is accompanied by evaluations and judgments about oneself, usually very critical.
The white bear problem: why we can’t stop thinking about something
In psychology we call “the white bear problem” the ironic situation in which Deliberate attempts to suppress a thought only increase the likelihood that they will reappear.. The name of this peculiar problem comes from the following example: if we told someone to think about a white bear and then told them to stop thinking about it, it is very unlikely that they would achieve this second guideline. The reason for this is that we cannot stop our thoughts just like that and all we will do is think about it even more.
If this inability to stop thinking about what we think occurs normally, this increases when we are emotionally tense and anxious. Anxiety is an experience that predisposes us to have more intrusive thoughts. and that end up becoming obsessions, worries and ruminations. Since we cannot control them, we become more nervous and, in turn, more of these ideas appear.
Related article: “Self-fulfilling prophecies, or how to make a failure yourself”
How to stop thinking about something you don’t want to think about
Stopping thinking about something that obsesses or worries us is complicated. Human beings do not have an off button for our minds. Fortunately, there are a series of strategies that can help us avoid thinking so much about what is currently occupying our minds and causing us discomfort. So, if there is something that obsesses you, it is important that you keep the following points in mind.
Regardless of the type of intrusive thought that invades our mind, a good way to weaken their effect is to relativize them. They are thoughts, ideas and images that are inside our head, not outside.. They are not facts nor do they define us or what may happen. Whatever the thought in question…. Having these types of thoughts does not make us a better or worse person and it does not mean that they will happen.
2. Accept that we cannot stop them
Trying to stop thinking about something when we are thinking about it doesn’t work. No matter how much we tell ourselves “stop thinking about this” or resort to similar behaviors, the thought is hardly going to stop at the moment it occurs. We must accept that we cannot stop them at once..
This does not mean that we cannot stop thinking about it, simply that we must understand that when the intrusive idea appears it will be there, it will occupy our consciousness for a moment. It will end up leaving. Trying to fight it when it occurs all you do is keep it more in mind and, therefore, think about it more.
You may be interested: “Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): principles and characteristics”
3. Manage our emotions
One of the factors that most attracts recurring ideas is finding ourselves emotionally tense, especially being stressed. Emotion management is a fundamental aspect of psychological well-being, and it has a great impact on what comes to mind. If our mood is negative, negative ideas will come to our mind and it is likely that we will not stop thinking about them..
On the contrary, if we are in a good mood, it is more difficult for us to think about unpleasant things. As our mind will already be occupied with various positive ideas and feelings, we are not going to occupy it with thoughts that harm us such as obsessions, worries and ruminations of all types and conditions.
