‘I Want To Be A Mother And I Can’t’: How Does It Affect Women?

Have you always wanted to be a mother and now you can’t? How does not being able to fulfill a maternal role affect women? Discover the psychological effects of this event.

Not being able to be a mother

More and more women are deciding not be mothers But what about those who want it and can’t? We are not only referring to those who suffer from an infertility problem, but also those cases in which someone, due to not having a partner or for professional reasons, cannot be a mother. How does this phenomenon affect?

I want to be a mother and I can’t: Why does it happen?

Being a mother can be a choice in most cases, but on some occasions, there are women who they cannot have children due to the following:

  • Biomedical barriers: There are women who they can’t get pregnant because they are infertile, that is, they are medically unable due to a problem in their physical health or age.
  • By the situation: Other cases are those people who they can’t be mothers because they do not have sufficient financial resources, or they are not in a relationship or they have many professional demands that do not allow it.

These are the two cases in which women may wish be mothers but they cannot fulfill the purpose of their motherhood. Despite this, you can always choose to adopt (if you really have the resources, the energy and you feel strong enough to do so).

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What are the consequences of not being able to be a mother?

Women who cannot fulfill the desire of be mothers They may experience some negative feelings about it. Among the most common emotional problems, we find the following:

  1. Feelings of guilt: The people who want be mothers and cannot They often experience a lot of guilt around a situation that they really cannot control.
  2. Low self-esteem: Not being able to fulfill motherhood It can end up affecting the self-esteem of women who want to be mothers and cannot fulfill it due to psychological or situational factors.
  3. Feelings of inferiority: Women who are in this situation may feel inferior compared to those who have had this opportunity.
  4. Anxiety and depression: He wanting to be a mother and not being able to It can affect women so much that they can experience anxiety and depression disorders due to it.
  5. Relationship problems: In the event that the woman is in a relationship, the not being able to be a mother It can lead to problems within the relationship.
  6. Effects on sexual relations: The sadness and low self-esteem derived from this situation can also affect the person’s sexual relationships.

Not fulfilling the dream or need be a mother It can affect those women who find themselves in this situation in many areas. If this is your case and you think it is causing problems in your daily life, perhaps you should go to a professional psychologist.

How to face not being able to be a mother?

How to deal with ‘I want to be a mother and I can’t’?

Although it is a difficult situation to face, the reality is that sometimes you can’t do anything to change these circumstances. Thus, to deal with negative feelings around not be a mother Even though you want it, you can follow the following tips:

  • Seek support: The pain of not being able to be a mother It can be unbearable in some cases. Therefore, it is vital to know that you are really not alone and that you have people by your side who can help you deal with these feelings. Trust your friends and family to tell them how you feel right now.
  • Understand your pain: To the not being able to be a mother It is normal to be overwhelmed by a feeling of emptiness similar to grief. Therefore, it is important to try to understand where this pain comes from and deal with it.
  • Allow yourself to cry: If you feel bad and want to cry because not being able to be a mother, allow yourself to vent. Not doing so can end up affecting you more.
  • Take care of yourself: In these cases, sometimes the essential thing is to face the pain of not being a mother by trying to take better care of yourself inside and out. That is, take time to rest, learn about yourself, and deal with these feelings.
  • Plan your future: A good way to turn the page on these feelings of pain at not being able to be a mother is to try to plan a future that is in line with your purposes in life. In this way, you will understand that you can fulfill yourself despite not comply with motherhood
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Although it is sad, not all women can achieve be mothers Whether due to events in life or due to biological issues, many women cannot play the role of mother. In these cases, it is important to remember that not everything should revolve around one type of family, but that there may be other ways to fulfill oneself and live a full life.