I’m Tired Of Living: Causes And What To Do To Get Back To Normal

Most people want to live. Whether they are in a moment of sadness or in a vital moment of maximum splendor and joy, almost everyone wants to enjoy the days they have left, which are expected to be as numerous and peaceful as possible.

However, Some people find themselves in a situation where the desire to continue seems to have diminished or even disappeared They say they are tired of living. But what does someone mean when they say they are tired of living? where does this fatigue come from?

Throughout this article we will try to give some answers to these questions.

Tired of living: what are we talking about?

It is possible to define the feeling of being tired of living as (or tiredness or vital fatigue) as the loss of physical, mental and emotional strength and energy that requires the will to stay alive, which is not due to the effects of an illness. and that it is not the result of a specific experience.

Although the feeling of exhaustion and boredom and loss of motivation is quite common after situations of great emotional pain, vital fatigue goes beyond that: It involves the cessation or decrease of the desire to continue living, a situation in which thoughts of death usually appear or the vision of it as something desirable. It is a tiredness and fatigue that generally persists over time.

Although in some cases it may not be pathological per se (the consideration of what life or death means may vary depending on each person’s culture and vision), as a general rule it is strongly associated with depressive symptoms.

Symptoms

In fact, vital fatigue is linked to very common symptoms in depressive symptoms and disorders, and It usually hides some type of depressive syndrome behind it: the appearance of anhedonia or inability to feel pleasure or enjoyment of activities that we previously liked and apathy or lack of will to act are common elements of both vital exhaustion and depressive disorders, along with thoughts of death.

Likewise, one of the most relevant aspects associated with vital fatigue is hopelessness, in which there is no expectation that the future will bring something better or it is not directly considered that we have a significant role in it.

It is more common than feelings and thoughts of vital fatigue in very elderly people, although occasionally cases are found in young individuals. These are often people who are accumulating personal losses or who no longer have something that allows them to feel rooted in the world, or who suffer from a history of pain and suffering from which they are not able to get rid of. Sometimes it is a very thoughtful feeling or sensation on the part of the person who expresses it, not being the product of a sudden emotional outburst.

The presence of tiredness or vital fatigue can lead to an active search for suicide, being a relevant risk factor. Now, someone who says they are tired of living does not always want to die. In fact, this situation could often be reversed if the person found a role, a role or a motive that led them to connect and actively participate in the world, or if they could change the pain they suffer (whether physical or mental). ).

Possible causes

As we have indicated previously, in most cases typical symptoms of depressive syndromes and disorders can be found. One of the most common is major depression, in which sadness and anhedonia, together with hopelessness, passivity and thoughts of death and suicide (among other possible symptoms), generate clinically significant discomfort for those who suffer from it or alter their functioning. , for at least two weeks.

In addition to major depression, another disorder that may be deeply linked to the appearance of this vital fatigue is dysthymia, also known as persistent depressive disorder. The continuity of the symptoms (less severe than those of major depression but which remain almost every day for at least two years), can lead to boredom and persistent and prolonged vital fatigue over time.

And even if they do not meet the diagnostic criteria for these or other depressive disorders, the symptoms may exist in a subsyndromal manner. Most people tired of living have a deep feeling of hopelessness and rootlessness. Many of them feel disconnected from the world or consider that their role has already passed and They do not find a reason that anchors them to life, to which despair is added and the failure to visualize the possibility that said reason exists.

Some people have found themselves in this situation due to experiencing traumatic situations (as occurred in the case of the young Dutch teenager who died in 2019 after having stopped eating and drinking, as a result of her desire to stop living after having suffered multiple sexual assaults since he was eleven years old).

Others are in a delicate moment in life in which they have lost abilities and have seen how all or a large part of their environment (family of origin, partner, friends and sometimes even offspring) died, losing most of what made them feel. part of this world.

Another of the most common causes of vital fatigue is continued suffering, the presence of a terminal illness with no expectation of recovery or the progressive loss of abilities Examples of this are found in cancers and dementias, in which the expectation of a painful process without options for improvement or the loss of skills and abilities caused by degeneration can lead those in said situation to rethink whether they want to continue. living.

To do?

Vital fatigue is a severe problem since it generates great suffering for those who suffer from it Treating it can be very complex, and can be carried out from a multidisciplinary approach. In many cases the treatment may be for major depression or dysthymia.

1. Psychological treatment

At a psychological level, aspects such as the person’s beliefs, the meaning of life and death, life expectations or vision of the future would have to be worked on.

If we find ourselves faced with dysfunctional elements, it is possible to use techniques such as cognitive restructuring to modify cognitive biases and maladaptive beliefs that may be at the basis of vital fatigue. It is also helpful to help form goals, both short and long term, that are meaningful and relevant to the individual. In this way, the need to work on the individual’s life project, as well as their values, desires and future plans, arises.

It will also be possible to work on situations such as loneliness or the presence of illnesses when helping to analyze the personal situation and make decisions if necessary. At a pharmacological level, the administration of antidepressants can be helpful in order to reduce feelings of sadness and anhedonia.

2. Intervention in the social context

Other types of actions have to do with the sociocultural and political context, working on some of the sociocultural problems that cause these to appear and that cause hopelessness and that a large part of the people who are tired of living are: the lack of social visibility of populations such as the elderly population, loneliness, the lack of a role or a role to fulfill or the perpetuation of a liquid social model, with few references and unstable values.

It is necessary to establish new policies that make it possible to give visibility to invisible parts of society, such as different minorities or members of the increasingly prevalent elderly. Educating in more stable values ​​and generating references at different moments in life can be very useful, as well as providing desirable roles and roles to fulfill at different ages.