Our existence is full of challenges. We must all learn to face problems and difficulties as inseparable parts of our development as human beings. This ability to successfully manage and overcome crises is known as resilience. Resilience refers to the ability to face and overcome difficult times, but also to recover from them.
This ability to recover and continue with a positive mindset in the face of daily difficulties can be the difference between someone able to function under pressure and someone who loses their cool in the face of the unexpected. In general, resilient people cope more effectively with times of stress.
From the field of psychology it has become evident that some people are born with a greater capacity for resilience than others. However, this attitude can also be learned; In this article we collect a series of techniques to develop one’s own resilience. Whether we are preparing for the future or going through a difficult time currently, these methods can help us cope with life more effectively.
In short, resilience is defined as the ability to bounce back after facing difficulties.
When we find ourselves faced with situations in life that are difficult to handle, we basically have two options. We can give up and let ourselves be defeated by the situation or cultivate resilience. That is, try to overcome it.
The dictionary of the Royal Spanish Academy of the language defines resilience as man’s ability to face extreme circumstances and overcome them. Many psychologists suggest that resilience, in addition to helping people overcome traumatic situations, also allows us to learn from them and develop our potential as human beings.
Resilience, as a psychological element, It was first described in the 70s. The American developmental psychologist Emmy Werner studied, about 20 years ago, a group of people on the island of Kauai, a small, relatively poor Hawaiian island.
His research ended in 1973, with a result that revealed the differences in resilience among the participating people. The study concluded that two-thirds of study subjects with alcoholic or mentally ill parents manifested problems in adulthood. However, a third of young adults were described as “resilient” and They showed no signs of difficulties despite their upbringing.
If we expand the definition of resilience; A person is resilient when they use mental processes and behaviors to protect themselves from stressors, or their negative effects, while promoting a positive attitude. The term is also associated with resilience, that is, the ability to calmly emerge from a difficult situation without lasting repercussions.
There are some situations, health conditions or psychological traits that limit the capacity for resilience. By closely examining these factors, we can better recognize What aspects of behaviors and conditions promote or impede greater resilience?. These features include:
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How to develop resilience capacity?
Resilience capacity is closely linked to other general health factors. By taking positive steps to improve our lifestyle, we can also develop resilience skills. The actions we take to take care of ourselves, such as eating well and exercising, allow us to better cope with the difficulties of daily life. Below we collect a series of general tips that can help develop better resilience.
1. Find a purpose
The search for meaning is an intrinsic need of the human being; However, many of us seem to walk aimlessly until something opens our eyes. Some people, after facing a traumatic situation, such as the death of a loved one, need to provide it with a positive meaning to be able to move forward. With this motivation, they may decide to found charities to try to prevent it from happening again or simply change their way of living and dealing with situations. Finding purpose after a crisis or tragedy is an important part of recovery.
2. Trust in your own abilities
The development of resilience begins with confidence in ourselves and our own abilities. This includes trusting our ability to deal with life’s stressors, or in the coping mechanisms themselves in the case of crisis. This self-confidence can be achieved by learning new skills, improving existing ones or taking on new challenges.
To achieve this we need to immediately replace negative thoughts with positive ones, phrases like “I am capable of doing it” or “I am good at my job” must replace the negative comments that exist in our head.
Developing good self-esteem is key to overcoming stress and recovering from difficult times. To increase it we need to frequently remind ourselves of what we do well and what we have been able to achieve. We must remember that life is not an easy path, simply wanting to move forward has a lot of value.
3. Have meaningful relationships
Dealing with a crisis always has an emotional cost. Having a network of support and trust can help considerably reduce the burden. Having people in our lives that we can trust helps us overcome obstacles and difficult times. Sharing our difficulties and allowing ourselves to talk about our feelings with someone close will not make our problems disappear, but it will help us manage them.
Ultimately, talking to someone about our difficulties can help us relieve stress, receive positive feedback, and even obtain possible solutions that we would not have been able to consider on our own.
4. Don’t be afraid of changes
Some people, when faced with big changes in their lives, become blocked and do not feel capable of facing the new situation. Instead, Resilient people are able to adapt to new circumstances and even thrive in them and they adapt easily to changes; In difficult moments they are able to see the positive in the new situation and accept it without resistance. Flexibility is an essential part of resilience.
4. Don’t be afraid of changes
It’s easy to forget to take care of yourself when you’re stressed or experiencing difficulties. Stress can negatively interfere with interest in food, exercise, or sleeping habits. Instead of focusing on stress and its consequences, it is important to focus on improving our ability to improve ourselves. This means invest time in activities we enjoy. Addressing our needs allows us to face life’s challenges with greater health and resilience.
Related article: “How to learn from mistakes: 9 effective tips”
Proactivity refers to the degree of initiative when facing new challenges. Proactive people have a positive attitude and propose new solutions to problems without being asked. People who are able to come up with solutions to a problem are better able to face the challenges of daily life than those who do not do so on a regular basis.
Proactivity is a trait that can be developed ; To do this we must experiment with different strategies, until we develop a logical way of solving problems that works for us and allows us to solve the most frequent ones. Exposing ourselves and solving problems on a regular basis prepares us to face future challenges and difficulties.
6. Set goals
To develop our resilience it is important to learn to set objectives, concise objectives help set goals. When facing a crisis, it is important to keep a cool head. Emotionally unstable people often feel unable to deal with a problem, while resilient people can set concrete goals to solve it. Although sometimes circumstances seem impossible to overcome, set reasonable goals by evaluating the situation realistically can allow you to dissect the problem and break it down into a series of smaller steps (objectives).
So when we feel overwhelmed by a situation, it is best to take a step back to evaluate its true extent. Analyze possible solutions and break them down into achievable steps.
7. Take action
Problems don’t go away on their own. Adopting a passive attitude towards problems often leads to prolonging them. Instead, it is necessary to work immediately to find possible solutions when a problem first appears. Although there is no quick or complete solution, you can always take steps to improve the current situation and reduce stress.
To deal with problems effectively, it is necessary not to focus on the work that still needs to be done, but rather to focus on the progress that has already been made, while planning the next steps that allow us to move towards improvement. Instead of passively waiting, acting proactively allows us to not only solve problems, but also make our goals a reality.
