Surely, on occasion, you will have met a person who has convinced you of what is best for you in a timely manner it turns out that what they think suits you suits them like a glove and in the end you realize that what you are doing is not your desire.
These individuals have no qualms about asking you to put your needs aside for the good of everyone. They are people who, when they got what they wanted from you, don’t even thank you.
These individuals often earn the label of manipulators, and unfortunately society is full of them They are very skilled at making you doubt your abilities, making you feel vulnerable or inferior to others. The ability they have to distort other people’s beliefs strengthens them when it comes to drawing you into their playing field, convincing you that you can’t do something or that you should do it their way since they are the ones who know how things are going.
Their strength lies in emotional exploitation (and emotional blackmail); this is, They manage your emotions, producing a feeling of guilt a guilt that is completely unfounded, and that causes you to end up giving in to their desires.
What are the manipulators like?
So in this way the manipulators manage to take control by finding rewards from their prey and also in a calculated way. In today’s article We will try to identify manipulative attitudes to stop them
1. They are specialized in detecting other people’s weaknesses
Absolutely all of us have weaknesses, and they are the instrument they use to hurt you since if you waver in what you believe, there is something that causes you shame and you want to hide, the manipulative person will try to find out and, if the opportunity arises, they can use it against you.
2. They will not stop until they get what they want
They show few qualms when it comes to stepping on anyone, for them the end justifies the means When they are going to act, their pulse does not tremble to do what is necessary in order to achieve their objectives, yet their behaviors usually go unnoticed since they are good actors.
Manipulation makes them feel powerful and, as is often the case with power, they always want more Their moral principles are somewhat damaged, as they are aware that by themselves they are incapable of achieving a goal, but that their manipulative capacity can allow them to reach their goal by making use of the merits of others, behind the backs of others. They are filled with ambition, a desire that, like drugs, produces a kind of addiction.
4. They need control
The manipulator usually suffers from what is known as a superiority complex; They tend to be people with traits close to egocentrism and narcissism. They like to improve themselves and surpass the level previously achieved, in search of increasingly greater challenges.
However, people who feel the need to consider themselves superior to others, even perfect beings, thriving through the merits of others, They denote a certain insecurity which they cover with the appearance of power but deep down they hide an overwhelming fear of appearing weak.
Are all manipulators the same?
Since manipulation is an art, we can say that The gift of manipulation consists of different abilities and skills , different types of manipulators can be recognized within this category. We meet them below.
1. The inciter
A typical case, in this case opposite to the two previous ones mentioned. He shows off strength, and not only, but also a certain aggressiveness In this case, if you are a passive person, you will give in to save having to face him. In such a way that “ad baculum” the manipulator gets what he wants through coercion, this is the case of antisocial personalities.
2. The discrediter
The narcissism of this subject is especially marked. He just feels perfect, he’s a white blackbird, he’s never broken a plate. He is the measure of things, his rule is the only one that counts. This “perfect gift” will emphasize that you are wrong every time you say something , when he gets the chance he will highlight your flaws and ridicule you with his sarcasm. They are people who dedicate themselves to judging others but who do not usually look in the mirror except to praise themselves.
This type in particular is especially harmful when it concerns a group of people, whether it may be work or family, He has a Machiavellian and twisted personality act by extracting your words and changing their meaning, a meaning intentionally different from the message you wanted to communicate.
With this ruse will make you wish you had swallowed your words , that these were not appropriate, that you have crossed the line or that you have not thought what you were saying, thus hurting another person. Metamorphosing your words in this way, communicating them to the person who best suits him and modifying his intention, so you can end up being the bad guy in the movie.
4. The victim
The world has hurt this guy, he never stops lamenting that everything bad happens to him and asking himself “why me?” He focuses a lot on his own pain, shielding his reprehensible attitudes and behaviors under victimhood, he is always the most unfortunate, far above the others. This type of behavioral picture is usually known as the Job syndrome
Besides, leads to thinking that it is others who abuse him , he demands justice and considers himself as a mistreated innocent, in this way he creates a discourse so that you feel guilty for his misfortune and how unfair the world is to him. So, they usually take advantage of that speech to make you lower your defense and force you to agree to what they ask of you out of pity or guilt. Later you will be disappointed, because it is not what you really wanted, but he has already achieved his goal through his whining.
5. The remora
This kind of manipulator uses your own ego He is capable of making you feel superior, next to you he is less than nothing, a weak and clumsy being, and he is clearly incapable of doing anything while you can, in this way you will end up doing what he cannot.
The pity it produces in you and your own strong ego will force you, unconsciously, to do what the manipulator does not want to do. In this way, the consequences of such an exercise will be yours without obtaining any reward other than the empty feeling of capacity, which will later become a waste of effort for which it has not been worth it in addition to the consequent exhaustion.
How to protect ourselves from these types of people?
There are different types of manipulators, as we have seen. However, What precautions can we take to avoid falling into their psychological games?
1. Be aware
The first thing we must do is become aware of the manipulation. There are rights that are inviolable and that cannot be transferred those rights are the following:
If you are involved with someone and feel that your rights are being undermined, Consider that you may be the victim of a manipulator
2. Keep a safe distance
Keep your distance emotionally Just like when driving, we maintain a safe distance so as not to bump into the other vehicle and avoid an accident. Do not allow anyone to invade your space or get close to its spider web to avoid being hunted. No one can hurt you without your consent.
3. You are not to blame
If you answer no to any of the questions we have mentioned above, consider that you may be the victim and not the other way around. There are certain aspects of the reality around you over which you can exercise control, however, most things are not in our hands, so, you are not to blame for what happens around you so if you start to feel that way, try to find out what’s going on.
Question:
Issues like these will make the manipulative subject consider that he has been betrayed and will probably look for another person to deceive.
4. Take your time
Do not respond to their demands immediately, you should reflect first Manipulators often put pressure on their victims so that they do not delay in agreeing to their demands. Knowing how to recognize these moments is essential to not allow the pressure of the moment to make us give in to rationality, causing the interests of others to pass us by.
5. Don’t hesitate
Do not waver in your convictions and stand firm in your affirmations Manipulators are very skilled at interpreting your non-verbal communication, if you hesitate they will notice this and apply more pressure until you finally give in.
In conclusion, if you come across a person who acts like this, you need to unmask him or her. If possible, you should try to help that individual so that he becomes aware that his behavior negatively affects others and, above all, himself. In any case, do not hesitate and use all these tools that you now know to avoid being a victim of his manipulation.
