Midlife Crisis: How To Face This New Stage In Our Lives?

The 30s It is an age where people have already assumed a lot of maturity after the challenging and lived 20s. That is why many experience certain concerns when the age approaches or is already fully in it. Part of the challenge of this time is that people are becoming more stable and already know how to approach their lives. It is a time where the majority feel stagnant and there is even the thought that from this age onwards there will no longer be great experiences. Dealing with each of the changes and challenges of getting older can lead to what is known as the midlife crisis.

Causes of the mid-30s crisis

Society puts a lot of pressure on our decisions, which is why many end up suffering from existential crisis at 30 People who suffer from it have the following recurring thoughts.

• They reflect a lot on past mistakes: To the 30 years It is a time where we think that we already have to have life decided. This is a very common mistake among our grandparents and parents, since it is one of the most conservative beliefs in our society. The reality is that you still have time to remedy what you consider to be past mistakes. Although it is more difficult to achieve your goals than in your 20s (since you have more responsibilities) you can still change jobs or develop new hobbies and passions. One of the characteristics of the crisis of 30 It is thinking that there is no longer time to do what you have always dreamed of. This not only causes frustration, but can also lead to problems with both self-esteem and certain depressive attitudes. Therefore, it is vital to leave these limiting beliefs behind and do everything you can to direct your life towards what you want most.
• You think you can’t change your profession: On many occasions the existential crisis of 30 in men and women It is preceded by the well-known burnout. When our job or profession does not convince us, many times we end up throwing in the towel and we limit ourselves to continuing in an environment that we do not want. This ends up being a mistake that can harm us and our environment. It is true that there are situations where it will be very difficult to change our way of living, but the reality is that there are ways out.
• Couple crisis: Many couples who started dating in their early 20s and reach their 30s find themselves in a crisis in their relationship. The reason is because most people change a lot throughout their twenties. Furthermore, many people believe that if they lose their partner at 30 they will no longer be able to start a family or they will be left alone. This is one of the beliefs that hurts us the most since it ends up causing emotional dependence in a relationship. The reality is that, in the same way that popular wisdom says, it is better to be alone than in bad company. Be single at 30 It doesn’t mean that you will never find love or that you can’t create a family.
• The time to have children?: 30 is a crucial age for women. The fact is that culturally many people have children between 30 and 40. For this reason, there is social pressure to start a family during this time. It is vitally important that both comments and popular beliefs do not affect you in this sense. You (along with biology) should be the one who decides when to have children. Being prepared for motherhood or fatherhood is a decision that you must make independently around you.

Although these are the best known psychological factors that can trigger the crisis of 30 , the reality is that any transition can lead to this recognized situation. By reflecting on your integrity and identity you can see all the evolution you have made during your life. Observing yourself can be the source of these psychological problems that arise during your thirties.

Symptoms of the midlife crisis

The crisis of 30 It is mainly characterized by asking ourselves deep questions about what we really want in our life, regardless of what is happening around us. So much so that the first thing we identify is that something is not going well in our lives, a fact that triggers some anxiety among other symptoms.

1. You feel like you don’t fit in: One of the most persistent symptoms in crisis of 30 It is feeling that we cannot adapt to our environment. On many occasions people have the belief that they are not in the right place.
2. You see life boring: You start to feel like every day is the same. Routine makes you feel bad even though you have everything you need to be happy.
3. You go on autopilot: Life is passing by quickly because you no longer live in the present. So much so that you consider that you are living almost like a robot.
4. Commitments overwhelm you: You believe that your commitments are trapping you into living a life that no longer feels like yours. So much so that you believe that you accept compromises just to adapt to others.
5. You don’t take care of yourself as much anymore: You have an internal belief that you no longer need to dress up so much. That’s why you no longer take care of yourself in the same way as before.
6. You make impulsive decisions : The discomfort caused by existential crisis at 30 It makes you make impulsive decisions like changing jobs or moving suddenly.
7. You are excessively worried about getting older: You think that you will get wrinkles that will no longer make you look as handsome as usual because of age.
8. You are interested in personal growth: Now that you are in a more mature stage of your life, you tend to seek information about personal improvement and how to know yourself. Although this is a positive attitude, the reality is that in excess it can even be limiting for your daily life.

If you are identifying with any of these symptoms, it is essential that you begin to act on these feelings. One of the ways to alleviate this anxiety is through psychological therapy.

How to manage a mid-30s crisis?

There are some psychological methods to face the situation in the best possible way. crisis of 30 and all the pressures that come from it.

• Seek perspective: Many times we are overwhelmed by the idea of be 30 years old since we think that we should have already met many of our goals. This is a thought that not only can hold us back from our goals but can also become a very negative belief for ourselves. As we have already said, we still have time to achieve our goals and purposes.
• Live how you want: Despite all the beliefs or demands that those around you tell you, you must keep in mind that it is your life and you have to do what you really want with it. If you don’t want to have children, don’t have them; If you want to change your profession or job and you have the desire to do so (with everything that entails), make that decision. The key is to accept who we are and know what we want for enjoy this new stage
• Everything you have done has served: Sometimes we look back and see only pessimistic thoughts about our path. Although we have not achieved our goals, many of the things we have done have helped us get closer to him, even though at first glance it may not seem like it.“Darkness is the light that you do not see”, Albert Einstein.
• You can change : Despite what many believe, change is possible. Therefore, if you are wanting to improve certain aspects of yourself that you don’t like, now is the best time. Instead of complaining about what you don’t like about yourself, motivate yourself to do better.

Thirties are a stage where you have the perfect youth and maturity to be able to enjoy both yourself and all aspects of your life. Therefore, it is essential that you do not limit yourself to believing that you are in a bad moment or that you are getting older. The 30s They are, on many occasions, one of the best stages of life.