Midlife Crisis: Symptoms, Causes And Solutions

The midlife crisis is a period of personal questioning that appears more or less in the middle of our lives when we pass from youth to maturity. The first thing that usually happens is that we become aware of death. We feel that, so to speak, start the count down and that makes us ask ourselves many important questions. We review what we have experienced until then, our goals achieved or not, our dreams, values, beliefs and desires.

This midlife crisis can be triggered by menopause, the death or abandonment of a family member, or noticing one’s own aging. In women it usually occurs more progressively and in men it usually occurs suddenly.

Not all people go through this crisis and not all those who go through it have the same characteristics, but there are common patterns that we will see below.

People going through a midlife crisis may have some or all of these symptoms and characteristics:

• Become aware of mortality. You become aware that life is limited and that time passes.
• Evaluate your reality: Ask yourself if what you have is what you wanted, if you have achieved success or met your expectations or dreams. Reflect and take stock.
• Set new goals: If the person perceives that they have not met their expectations, they can make a radical change in their life. Ending his marriage, leaving his job to dedicate himself to something he likes more or taking trips that he never took are the most common options in these crises.
• Recover youth: take care of your physical appearance, do activities associated with youth, start playing a sport, dress more youthful…
• Train in what you are passionate about: whether studying a new career, reading books or information on the chosen topic or attending courses and workshops.
• Search for young emotional companions: It is common to desire the attention of a younger person looking for new sensations. Some couples separate and others may commit infidelities.
• Tell the world about your new life: Whether in meetings or through their social networks, they want to show others what they have discovered, what they are like now, how they think and what their new life is like.

It may also happen that you have an existential crisis that translates into frustration and unhappiness due to not having achieved your goals or due to becoming aware of mortality. When this happens, they often suffer from depression. One of the most common behaviors that appear when the midlife crisis is negative is the increase in alcohol consumption as a means to escape from reality, with its corresponding consequences.

The midlife crisis appears between 40 and 50 years of age. lasts at least a year and can last several. As I mentioned before, it is common for women to present progressively, even at a younger age, and in men more radically. So in their case it may go unnoticed and the changes are not perceived as drastic.

The midlife crisis is usually triggered by important life events such as the death of someone close (we become aware of mortality), our children leaving home (we become aware that our youth has ended), the abandonment of a family member, menopause or the awareness of aging itself.

This does not mean that if any of these circumstances occur, a crisis will necessarily occur, but they are common triggers.

The causes of this crisis, as well as other previous ones in our lives, such as in adolescence or parenthood, are relevant changes in the development of our lives. When we move to a new stage we face a series of new circumstances that deeply influence us. In the case of this crisis, becoming aware that we are entering the last stages of life makes us ask ourselves if we have really taken advantage of the time former. We perceive that it is our last opportunity to feel fulfilled because we are aware that old age entails a series of physical, work and social limitations to carry out our dreams.

If you find yourself in this period, it is normal for you to wonder how to get out of the midlife crisis. Below we provide you with 7 practical tips to overcome the midlife crisis:

1. Talk to someone you trust about what is happening to you.
2. Go to a therapist that can guide you in the process.
3. Spend more time with your loved ones. Show them your affection.
4. Don’t make impulsive decisions without analyzing their short and long term consequences. Above all, reflect before making decisions that make permanent changes.
5. Request a leave of absence from your job and dedicate yourself to what you like without giving up your place. It is a way to try what you are passionate about but in a less risky way. You don’t know if you will want to come back and it is not advisable to reject it.
6. Do not consume substances that influence your conscience (alcohol, drugs…) in these circumstances can make you make bad decisions.
7. Talk to someone who has been through this crisis. Their experience will help you feel understood and avoid mistakes.

In the following article you will find more information about How to overcome an existential crisis.

This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

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