Personal Development: 5 Reasons For Self-reflection
He Personal development and the self-reflection , are two of the keys to the emotional well-being of any person, although they are often overlooked or their importance is underestimated. This usually happens because investing time and effort in enhancing them goes against the productive logic under which we usually live: it is not necessarily reflected in making money or in increasing the attractiveness of our resume, nor does it make our way of life fit with the idea of conventional “success” that is fostered through social media, television, etc.
For all these reasons, in this article we will delve into the reasons why self-reflection and personal development should be part of your life project, ensuring that your day-to-day actions and your sources of motivation are linked to these types of experiences. of growth.
What we understand today by personal development consists of entering into learning and self-improvement processes in which we can face challenges aligned with our most genuine values and interests, in order to bring meaning to our lives and live an experience of personal progress
That is to say, personal development allows us to create a satisfactory and exciting narrative about our own life journey, about our way of facing the complicated situations we experience and building our own identity through our actions and relationships with others. In this sense, it is closely linked to the concept of self-realization, and also to self-reflection. And we cannot live a true path of personal development if we do not learn to listen to ourselves, and appreciate what is meaningful to us.
The importance of self-reflection
Practicing self-reflection is a very important aspect in a person’s development. Intuitively, many will agree when stating that experience is one of the best ways to grow
Learning from mistakes is something that has happened to all of us, but the experience can have different consequences for each person: not everyone will perceive the facts in the same way. Without an active thought process about what we experience or without questioning the meaning of those experiences, learning, in many cases, will not occur. In other words, what takes us from simple experience to learning is the self-reflection
Self-reflection will allow us to learn more deeply by seeing situations from different lenses and by encouraging challenging questions that will lead us to question our own beliefs about the world. If the reflection is correct, it will help us to be more realistic and continue our path in personal development.
Reflection and emotions: walking towards well-being
We have already talked about the relationship between well-being and emotions in our article “What is emotional intelligence?”.
For example, the development of self control refers to an improvement in impulse management, emotional self-regulation the planning the self-awareness and the social adaptation , which are absolutely essential for human well-being and which are fully in line with meaningful learning for and for life. To acquire good self-control, this requires a good level of inner reflectionso the connection between self-reflection and well-being seems evident.
The word welfare that is to say, be okay, refers to “being in the place I want to be”, and implies achieving balance and harmony in our daily lives; in our relationship with ourselves and in our interaction with others. Therefore, well-being is not a constant, but a dynamic component, which is built throughout life and can change at any time.
However, Well-being can become a relatively stable characteristic if we achieve a good relationship with our interior By achieving this, we will be able to cope with the various experiences that come our way throughout our daily lives. That’s what personal development is all about.
Personal development and self-reflection: curiosity and pain
To build the internal support that will allow us to face the situations and problems of our daily lives, it will be necessary to make difficult decisions, assume a position or a certain point of view and decide the best choice. If we want well-being to be a more or less stable trait, we will have to ask ourselves the following question from time to time: “Is this where I want to be?”.
This question will allow us know if we are really in the place we want to be (our job, our partner, our city, etc.). If the answer is yes, we will be in a State of Flow and everything will seem to go in harmony. If the answer is no, then we will be in the place of discomfort. The way to reach well-being again is self-reflection: moving towards personal development.
Therefore, the path of personal development is neither more nor less than the path to well-being, to the place where I want to be, but this does not mean that we are constantly reflecting. We already discussed the importance of living in the present in the article “Mindfulness: 8 benefits of full attention.”
Even so, Mindfulness requires reflection and knowledge of our emotional state, to later accept ourselves as we are. Furthermore, the present will also tell us whether we are comfortable or not, since there are two paths that will lead us to self-reflection: curiosity and pain
The problems of avoiding reflection
Constantly living far from the present, in the past, in the future or in the excessive self-demands that we place on ourselves, are not due to full self-knowledge, but to an unbalanced and unobjective image of ourselves, which generates low self-esteem, feelings of inadequacy, social withdrawal, low assertiveness, constant stress and anxiety, psychosomatic problems and poor emotional well-being.
Although reflecting on personal development might seem easy at first glance, there are many people who turn to coaching professionals to unblock themselves. The coach, as a facilitator of personal development, gets the client to reflect through Socractic questions, allowing the client to continue growing as a person. The coach helps connect with desires and emotions and although reflection could seem like an intellectual act, it is an emotional act: detachment plays a determining role when growing as individuals.
In fact, avoiding self-reflection is common. When it is curiosity that leads us to reflect and we avoid it, the rigidity If we consider that there are other ways of doing things, but we are afraid of that possibility, we will surely never get out of it. comfort zone. On the contrary, if it is pain that leads us to reflect, but we do not attack that detachment, it will surely appear. the sadness In the long run, sadness will turn into melancholy and we will continue to think that the past was always better.
We live in a society that has undergone profound changes in recent decades. Globalization has brought another way of thinking to all of us and capitalism has influenced our lives. to the point of being objects before subjects It is not easy to look inward when culture leads us to constantly look outward, to compare ourselves, to be more successful, more consumers, etc. In the midst of so much information (or infoxication) we cling to old certainties to feel safe, unable to describe reality as it is.
So, we deny our emotions and we live together in a thoughtless psychic-emotional state Our value only seems to have value in the approval of others. In order not to be left over, you have to have designer clothes, a pretty girl, a successful profession, a good position, a good car, etc… building a path of suffering, far from a true sense of personal development, emotional well-being and back pain. to our own desires.
Fortunately, we have the reflective capacity to detach ourselves from certainties, to connect with ourselves and to self-reflect. In the personal dimension, our arguments and actions are always guided by our emotions, so it is important to understand and accept them. We do not know what is going to happen in the next present, but whatever happens will be different if it happens in the emotion of expectation, control, superficiality, hypocrisy, or if it happens from the emotion of self-respect, acceptance, gratitude, trust, tenderness.
Summing up: the 5 fundamental points for self-reflection
In summary, these are the five reasons for self-reflection that will guide you on the path of personal development:
